The material presented
here is not Al-Anon Conference Approved Literature. It is a method
to exchange
information, ideas, feelings, problems and solutions on a personal
level.
I recently volunteered to care for a little abandon kitten. He's about 3 weeks old. Therefore, he needs to be bottle fed and have his little private parts messaged so he can elminate body waste.
I was very reluctant to take this cat home. However, given the circumstances, he would have died if left there.
So as I am taking care of this little one - feeding and messaging him - every 4 hours around the clock, I find myself worrying. What will I do with him? My indoor cat of 6 years dislikes other cats. I don't want to have one indoor cat and one outdoor cat. I don't want the expense of another cat (I feed my cat premium food). Worry thoughts just kept going through my head as I cared for this kitten, robbing me of the moment.
Then it dawned on me! Caring for this kitten could help me practice living one day at a time. Just for today, I'll care for this kitten and actually enjoy doing it. Imagine that!
So now when I catch myself worrying about what will be the outcome of this kitten, I just begin to study his little stripes, or talk to him, or really be mindful of how he feels in my hands and how neat it is to care for him - just practing being in the now. I deliberately take my mind of my worries and experience how it feels. Nice!
But then - I get interrupted by my conditioned thinking (old mental tapes) breaking the peacfulness as it tells me "You'd better think about what you're going to do with this kitten! You know your indoor cat hates cats! What are you going to do???? This is irresponsible of you to not worry! I call these old tapes "Fang" cause they try to clamped down on me and hold me hostage.
However, "Fang" doesn't have such a grip on me any longer. I like the new way of thinking feels, even though it feels a bit awkward. So I practice, practice, and practice some more. One day it will be second nature.
So perhaps this little kitten is a blessing; it's giving me opportunities each day to be in the moment.
By the way, anyone want a precious little kitten? (just kidding).
Take good care, Gail
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
Great use of your alanon tools It is so wonderful to be in the moment and truly feel the joy!!!
I am glad you have identified "FANG" and do not let him take hold. Mine is called: ANTS (Automatice Negative Thoughts) So glad that we discovered they are not true and that "worry "does not help a sistuation only robs us of the joy of the day and moment
Gail I love your share it's sooo true!! :) Enjoy your little kitty, then answers will come when it's time. :)
Hugs, P :)
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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Dear Gail, I have an idea. How about asking Debilyn (catwhisperer). She is so good with these situations. I am not sure that it is essential that the cats "love" each other. As long as they co-exist is enough. I have had many cats that lived together, but weren't "in love".
A good example of living, with faith, in the moment.
How cool is that? Great awareness and work! I would take the kitty if I lived close. We have two cats that are really friendly! Lol... take care and enjoy!
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-youfoundme
Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me...
Praise to Higher power for using this kitten to remind us all to stay out of the future (where I get fearful because I don't know what it looks like).... and to stay in the moment, where all is well. Thank you for sharing this.
More shall be revealed, things will become clear, today is not that day, that's all. Until then, good job practicing one of the most difficult behaviors .... waiting.
((Gail)) ((little kitty))
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The prayer isn't for Higher Power to change our lives, but rather to change us.
Otie: One of the first persons I contacted was Debilyn. I sent her a PM just an hour after he was brought home. She gave me some tips and I found an excellent website for learning how to take care of such young kittens.
My indoor cat has beat up two female cats that I've brought home. He literally terrorized them. They were both very gentle cats! The vet had warned me that my cat is best being the only one. But I didn't listen. I had to find homes for both cats. I didn't bring both of these females home at once. It happended over a two-year period.
Why when I wonder about the kitty's future is it always negative? Is negative thinking innate or learned behavoir? I'd like to think it's learned.
Perhaps I will run across an awesome cat lover who will want the kitty. But then, I'm growing attached to it.. So is my former recovering AH! He is the one who brought the kitten home!
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You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
Being in the moment is such a hard and valuable lesson to learn -- I am such a beginner -- but what a wonderful way you have of practicing!
Having taken in more rescued cats than I should ever admit, I'll just add that it's my experience that adult cats don't react to kittens the way they react to other adults. At first they're suspicious and hostile, but after a few weeks they come round. It has something to do with the kitten not reacting the way an adult would, with returned hostility. However, you'd want to wait for the introduction till the kitten is old enough to fend for itself (12 weeks or more, I'd say). For a while it will be so little that the big cat will pin it down in playing, there will be kitten shrieking, etc. etc. This was the case with my grumpy and hostile older cat and the new kitten I saved. When the kitten got old enough to hold her own, they played more successfully, and now they are the best of friends. My grumpy and hostile cat even washes the kitten. Definitely a variety of Miracle in Progress.
But -- one day at a time! So many opportunities life gives us to practice!
I love labs, too! My former husband had a black lab when I first met him. That dog didn't want to give up his seat in the car when I came on the scene.
I'd love to be retired, live in the country, and have loads of money to care for animals!
__________________
You have to go through the darkness to truly know the light. Lama Surya Das
Resentment is like taking poison & waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt
