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Miracles In Progress 12 Step Recovery Forums -> Al-Anon Family Group -> Al-Anon Family Group -> And it Still Goes On :)
Post Info TOPIC: And it Still Goes On :)
Jozie


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And it Still Goes On :)
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When life goes faster then I can...

In 2 days my Baby boy will be 14... Its hard to beleive that he is that old all aready, but I have been very accepting most of the time of him growing into a young man.. Not easy for me... He is my One & Only and at times I truly can't believe how fast time has gone by...

this past weekend we had him a Sleep over party at the river, and it was a great time... He has such a Great group of friends that I have come to Love and just sitting around with a bunch of teenagers, around a camp fire roasting marshmellows & listening to what they go thru, and the silly, goofy things that talk about, I feel quite lucky that they still let me hang with them...lol...I feel pretty good that Most of them know they can talk to me about just about anything... However "Sometimes" I have regrets on curtain subjects :O lol...

I went down a day early, and got things set up, grass mowed, sodas/waters iced, food prep't and just spent the evenning chillin with my dogs, and swimmin in the river with my family... It was a Great Night tho, My boy on his B-day weekend caught an 8lb Catfish, and he was Over the Moon about it... It was pretty great, the 1st one he Ever caught that big, and the fish wore him out so much he was so excited he couldn't even fish anymore...lol... I am grateful I decided to walk over and meet them because I started to Over Prep for the Party, and Hp Lead me to the other side of the river with them instead...Camera in hand of course so i got some Great pics for him...

I have been practicing my HP time on a more minute by minute part of my day and boy has it payed off... I have been accepting of my surroundings, I have been speaking to HP on a more rapid basis, and just feeling his presents like never before...I Now can say... The God of My Understanding is Now Driving and i am on Co-Pilot...I am slowly enjoying riding Shotgun :)

Even at the party Saturday with all the distractions, I still felt, Ease, balance & Grace... And that is Good for me...Rare at times... but Good... when I had about 14 kids total I was responsible for most of the day, and didn't loose my mind...lol... The only time it got scarey was when my Husband got stung about 15 times by Bee's... ;( Needless to say, he is now ok, but had to be knocked out for most of the party... but Thank God above that was the only Mishap all weekend...he was tryin to clear a path up one of the trails and the bees come out of the ground after him... So Greatful tho that He Found them and Not the Kids...

For the longest time in my life i always felt like i was running on Auto pilot! I just did did and did somemore that i never took the time to even realize half the time what the H$ll I was doing! I was so use to "going with the flow" only My Flow was trying to Control Everything & Everyone around me! It feels so great to just hand it over to HP, and be OK that Its Out of my Control... and yet things still end Happily and with me not so Stressed over the rest...

I Can't say I have it all figured out, I don't think anyone can... But just seeing the improvements on a more daily basis, and Feeling the pressents of my HP more then just in troubled times... I am slowly Let Go of My Cody behavior of Years past, and really trying NOT to be the steam roller I was so use to being... I have noticed the change in so many things... Even My Friendships have Grown stronger with people I would have normally either been intimidated by, or controled... Now I do my best to stay on My side of the street know matter what others think or say about them , and just keep an open mind about Everyone... Not Just the ones at one time that may not have fit into my close minded/ judgemental world...

You know one thing  that has ALWAYS irritated me the most about people was "Judgemental People" and then I Realized the reason I couldn't stand them... Was because that was One of the things I Hated most about myself..I just didn't know how Not to be That Person... .I have worked very hard to change that about myself, now to say that i don't slip from time to time would be a fib..(I am Terrible with Road Rage at time:() . but I have so much seen improvement, and I noticed that those that where around me that bothered me the most with there judgement,  I can now get up and walk away from the group and not have to be apart of it... never seen that as an option before... Thought if someone was talking I had to have INPUT... Let the Truth be known... I Don't... and Silence is Golden... Who Knew =)

Funny what this program can do for you! When I joined I had know idea the changes would be IN ME! Not my Alcoholics... Now things with me and my Alcoholics have changed, becuse I do now have boundry's in place and learned to say NO! But the Biggest change has def. been Within Me! I feel like a Child that just got her 1st A+, and can't wait to get to the Next Subject and see if I can get another one!

There is/was a reason I didn't find this program till AFTER I lost my Afather to this Disease, It was Time for Me! Time for me to Heal my Past, Accept my Pressent, and Start Looking Forward to my Future, to start Living instead of just existing in the world of others, and never knowing what was Right for ME!, or even what I Wanted really... I can now say, this program is Def. for Me! About Me...

I am Very grateful for the Love & Support i have Found here, however I am Most grateful to now have an Extended Family that loves & accepts me for Who & What I am Without boundrys or rules... I Love coming and Hearing your story's, becuase even tho at times you all are stuggling, your struggles help show me that i am Human, and regardless of whats next, I CAN!

Thanks for Being here One & All... Thank you for my Growth, Thank you for Your Friendship, But mostly Thanks for your ESH... I am Forever in your debt...

Thanks for letting me Share :0) 
Love, Hugs & Prayers to All

 

Jozie



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Thee Only Journey I Control Is MY Own :)

Gratitude.... Is a God Honoring Attitude! :D
Pushka


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Hugs Jozie,

what a wonderful share what a blast the party sounded like!! Oooowwwiieee on the bee stings too :(

You give me hope that I can make it to that point and have that in my life. So thank you so very much. :)

Hugs P :)

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Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not more difficult than remaining in a situation, which is not nurturing to the whole woman.- Maya Angelo
Debilyn


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This was great, I felt like I was there! Well Jozie my little boy is 35!! tomorrow. It goes so dang fast. Last I remember I was holding his hand in the parking lot...sigh.

your love and spark just shows big time girl.

I learned the more I loved and appreciate the me HP helps me to be, being critical is non existant.

Hugs! deb



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Putting HP first, always  <(*@*)>

"It's not so much being loved for ourselves, but more for being loved in spite of ourselves."

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hotrod


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Hi Jozie

Another, inspirational posting. I can truly identify with being on auto pilot before alanon and not even being aware of the destructive attitudes and behaviors I was engaged in. I love how you discovered your judge mental attitude by focusing on yourself and the reasons you are upset by others actions.

Alanon tools of Focusing on myself, removing blame and criticism from my attitudes, enabled me to finally see me and what I was doing to hurt myself

You are growing and reaping the rewards. Good work.

So sorry to hear about hubby and glad he is on the mend



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AnnieMar


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That was really an inspiring, uplifting post, Jozie. Thank you so much for sharing it.

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youfoundme


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I have a 14 year old son too :) Glad you had a nice time :) Thats awesome!

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-youfoundme

Let go and let God...Let it be... let it begin with me... 

 
maresie


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Glad you had such a wonderful time.

 

Maresie.



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maresie
flopadopilus


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Great share thanks Jozie!

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God grant me the serenity 
To accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference. 

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