This is one of my favorite topics, and one I think I've mastered at times, and then I realize, not so much!
The reading says we should let the alcoholic be--they need to hit their own bottom. We have to get out of the way, which is detaching with love. It's not disinterest, but others must be free to handle themselves. It's a way of showing respect not to impose our thoughts and opinions on them. It means learning the difference between helping and interference.
Yup, Amen to this. For years and now once in a while , I thought/think I know what my A should be doing. I gave so many suggestions before recovery--OMG! At least now I catch myself often before I even speak, so I can think of a way to give my thoughts in "I" statements instead of "you" statements. I believe I am entitled to give my opinion one time in a respectful way, and then let go and let God!
a4l said
June 17th
The irony of the timing as i re read the merry go round called denial. I've found getting out of the way is not always what the A wants. I feel like I want to move to the moon and the A would move there as well while claiming to hate me. Hate the insanity of this disease so much.
Lyne said
June 18th
Yes, definitely a merry-go-round, just not so merry. Insanity is a much better description!
Macworkz said
7 days ago
we didn't have a meeting in the area that I live. My phone died with my neighbors I have to detach and I wasn't able to get to meetings they were 20 miles away at the time I was challenged on both time and resources. So we put one out in the middle of very small town where the bigger towns around can access it and we put that on the same day that we have a growing substantial alcoholics anonymous meeting we ran ours an hour and a half beforehand to allow 30 minutes for us to get out of there before the AA show up it worked out really well for me. If it were for people like you would never have to do this thanks for being there for me and help me stay saying one more day.
Lyne said
6 days ago
Keep coming back! We need you as much as you need us. :)
This is one of my favorite topics, and one I think I've mastered at times, and then I realize, not so much!
The reading says we should let the alcoholic be--they need to hit their own bottom. We have to get out of the way, which is detaching with love. It's not disinterest, but others must be free to handle themselves. It's a way of showing respect not to impose our thoughts and opinions on them. It means learning the difference between helping and interference.
Yup, Amen to this. For years and now once in a while , I thought/think I know what my A should be doing. I gave so many suggestions before recovery--OMG! At least now I catch myself often before I even speak, so I can think of a way to give my thoughts in "I" statements instead of "you" statements. I believe I am entitled to give my opinion one time in a respectful way, and then let go and let God!