Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author speaks about step 6: being entirely ready to have our HP remove our defects of character. The author shares that they sometimes cling to their character defects because they do get a certain amount of pleasure from them, for example revenge upon those who have caused us harm, or enjoying thinking that they are never wrong. However, defects of character get in the way of the author living the kind of life that they want to live, and they prevent us from treating ourselves and others with love and respect. The author shares that if they really want healing, they must be willing to turn their character defects over to their higher power.
Today's Reminder: Are the small, temporary pleasures I get from my defects of character worth the price I am paying to keep them? If not, I may be entirely ready to let some of them go today.
Today's Quote: "I know that help is waiting only for my acceptance, waiting for me to say, 'Not my will but Thine be done.'" The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage
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One of the ways that I've started to think of defects of character is that they really aren't defects, they are strengths that I am using out of proportion. This makes me off-balanced. Sometimes, living with the disease of alcoholism leads me to over-rely on certain strategies that are effective for a time, and have their place. But, my overreliance on them prevents me from building other strengths. When I use my strengths in proportion and appropriately, I can still find times when I might need to use a certain strategy, but I find even more times when another strategy would be a better fit for my life and the way I chose to walk in the world.
Daffodils said
Jun 8, 2022
Thank you Skorpi for your service and share. Right now , the words entirely ready seem daunting. Can I settle for somewhat ready? lol. Anyways, a defect of mine-cut a person off instead of adjusting a boundary is playing in my head. A long time friend has worn me out with her stubborn behaviour. Clearly I need to do a step 4&5 and then ask HP to remove the defect that's getting in the way of my spiritual growth so I can change MY behaviour(s).
SunnyFrog said
Jun 9, 2022
Good morning.
I know I have some things I need to work on,things that seem like a necessity but in reality are just part of my controlling ways.
I am ready for them to be removed but I'm not quite willing to let go of them yet. I'm not sure why and need to do some inner reflection.
Have a good day everyone!
DM2021 said
Jun 9, 2022
Good day to everyone!!
Thank you Skorpi, Daffodils and Sunnyfrogs for all your shared ESH and to you Skorpi for your service!
I realized that when I do not give that control to my HP, it is my ego clinging to the fact that somehow
I am losing that control. When I let go and let God, it gives back that control to the alcoholic or who ever is
causing issues and the only thing that changes is that I have attained serenity, peace and humility!!!
I learned that proving that I am right, even when I maybe, really isn't as important as I thought!!!
Those issues causing conflict are momentary, but the fallout can last forever!!
Lyne said
Jun 9, 2022
Thanks Skorpi for your service and for all above ESH. Just want to say that I appreciate ESH as I receive wisdom from everyone.
I have reached a point in my recovery where I ask God every day to give me help and remove my shortcomings. Although they seem to be less intense over time and occur less frequently, it seems to be a very slow process. Progress not perfection ODAT.
Daffodils said
Jun 9, 2022
Thanks DM2021. You hit the nail on the head! It's my bloody ego! We're engaged in a contest of wills. Time to invite HP into this drama. Sure feels better than my plan to block her. No out of sight out of mind BS. Deal with the temporary conflict instead of having a permanent fallout. It's a challenge but I'm open to trying new ideas. I appreciate all the shares. Have a great day.
Hello MIP! In today's C2C, the author speaks about step 6: being entirely ready to have our HP remove our defects of character. The author shares that they sometimes cling to their character defects because they do get a certain amount of pleasure from them, for example revenge upon those who have caused us harm, or enjoying thinking that they are never wrong. However, defects of character get in the way of the author living the kind of life that they want to live, and they prevent us from treating ourselves and others with love and respect. The author shares that if they really want healing, they must be willing to turn their character defects over to their higher power.
Today's Reminder: Are the small, temporary pleasures I get from my defects of character worth the price I am paying to keep them? If not, I may be entirely ready to let some of them go today.
Today's Quote: "I know that help is waiting only for my acceptance, waiting for me to say, 'Not my will but Thine be done.'" The Dilemma of the Alcoholic Marriage
-----------------------------
One of the ways that I've started to think of defects of character is that they really aren't defects, they are strengths that I am using out of proportion. This makes me off-balanced. Sometimes, living with the disease of alcoholism leads me to over-rely on certain strategies that are effective for a time, and have their place. But, my overreliance on them prevents me from building other strengths. When I use my strengths in proportion and appropriately, I can still find times when I might need to use a certain strategy, but I find even more times when another strategy would be a better fit for my life and the way I chose to walk in the world.
I know I have some things I need to work on,things that seem like a necessity but in reality are just part of my controlling ways.
I am ready for them to be removed but I'm not quite willing to let go of them yet. I'm not sure why and need to do some inner reflection.
Have a good day everyone!
Thank you Skorpi, Daffodils and Sunnyfrogs for all your shared ESH and to you Skorpi for your service!
I realized that when I do not give that control to my HP, it is my ego clinging to the fact that somehow
I am losing that control. When I let go and let God, it gives back that control to the alcoholic or who ever is
causing issues and the only thing that changes is that I have attained serenity, peace and humility!!!
I learned that proving that I am right, even when I maybe, really isn't as important as I thought!!!
Those issues causing conflict are momentary, but the fallout can last forever!!
I have reached a point in my recovery where I ask God every day to give me help and remove my shortcomings. Although they seem to be less intense over time and occur less frequently, it seems to be a very slow process. Progress not perfection ODAT.