Today's reading is by someone who viewed their experiences with alcoholism as a technicolor extravaganza on a big screen, with their name in lights. It seemed like a big, splashy story. They told it again and again, until they realized it had become smaller, like a home movie. Now, instead of being the star in a melodrama of martyrdom, they now see themselves as having an important role, but not one in flashing lights. They understand that their story is not unique.
Today's Reminder: Al-Anon has given me an opportunity to share my home movies with others. My situation is neither the best nor the worst. Although I am unique in some ways, I am more like others than I ever suspected. I appreciate this sense of fellowship today.
Quote from the Al-Anon Welcome: "...as we learn to place our problem in its true perspective, we find it loses its power to dominate our thoughts and our lives."
-----------------
Today's share reminds me that when I first came to Al-Anon, I had a great need to tell the shocking story of what was going on in my life, with a sick alcoholic husband at home. I was not one of those members who stayed silent in the meeting for months on end. I always shared, and when I was asked to lead a meeting, I told my story in as much detail as would fit in the allotted time. I had a tremendous need to tell as much detail as possible -- because that's where I was, in the details. I had not yet reached the big picture.
Now, when I share in a meeting, I can tell my background story in a sentence or two. Then I move along to how I'm using the Al-Anon tools in my daily life. During my first few months in the program, I would be quite annoyed, disappointed, and frustrated when I heard members speaking about how they used Al-Anon tools when dealing with their friends or their co-workers. I would think: Friends? Work? You think those are problems?? Look at what I'm dealing with at home! I wanted to hear other dramatic stories like mine, from people who were as angry as I was. Sometimes I did hear those stories, but too many of the members in my group just had too darn much recovery.
Now, I'm one of those annoying people with calm or humorous stories about Al-Anon tools in my life. When appropriate, I apologize to newcomers about that. But it was all the listening I received, when I needed to tell my big-screen story over and over again, that allowed me to move beyond it. It does not dominate my thoughts. It's a short feature, not a blockbuster film. So now I am boring, and I love it!
I am taking a break from the Intimacy book this week -- maybe it will be back next week, but I take in one day at a time.
Lyne said
Sep 24, 2021
Thank you FT for your service and interesting share. I was ashamed and embarrassed by my home movie, and I distanced myself from friends and family. I could not believe what had happened to my happy little life. And I was in so much pain....
Fast forward, and hearing the quote from the welcome, thank God "we find it loses its poser to dominate our thoughts and our lives." But I was obsessed with my spouse/marriage and for a couple years could not control my thinking at all. I was constantly trying to figure out new ways to fix things and was not a peace.
Grateful member. :)
DM2021 said
Sep 24, 2021
Thank you FT for your service, today's reading and to you and Lyne for both your ESH.
TGIF MIP Family!!
I too am a grateful member of Al-Anon/MIP in that I have learned that my situation/life is not unique when it comes
to living with alcoholism/active drinker.
I was reading today in the C2C (I am on July) that when we try to force issues in our favor it is like trying to force
a seedling to grow with our fingers or we try to hold onto those happy situations that are sometime (from our
perspective) far and few is like trying to hold onto a hand full of water, both are quite impossible and very frustrating.
Al-Anon has taught me that it is to my advantage to live in the moment and be grateful for the lessons instead of
trying to control things that are not within my control, in that way there is less and hopefully no melodrama and life
can be more peaceful and focused on ourselves.
{{HUGS}}
Daffodils said
Sep 24, 2021
Thank you Freetime for your service/ESH. I am grateful for members who shared some of their back stories. That's where I was able to identify and no longer felt alone. It easier to follow directions from people who have lived experience... Thank you for the show
:) Have a wonderful day
Today's reading is by someone who viewed their experiences with alcoholism as a technicolor extravaganza on a big screen, with their name in lights. It seemed like a big, splashy story. They told it again and again, until they realized it had become smaller, like a home movie. Now, instead of being the star in a melodrama of martyrdom, they now see themselves as having an important role, but not one in flashing lights. They understand that their story is not unique.
Today's Reminder: Al-Anon has given me an opportunity to share my home movies with others. My situation is neither the best nor the worst. Although I am unique in some ways, I am more like others than I ever suspected. I appreciate this sense of fellowship today.
Quote from the Al-Anon Welcome: "...as we learn to place our problem in its true perspective, we find it loses its power to dominate our thoughts and our lives."
-----------------
Today's share reminds me that when I first came to Al-Anon, I had a great need to tell the shocking story of what was going on in my life, with a sick alcoholic husband at home. I was not one of those members who stayed silent in the meeting for months on end. I always shared, and when I was asked to lead a meeting, I told my story in as much detail as would fit in the allotted time. I had a tremendous need to tell as much detail as possible -- because that's where I was, in the details. I had not yet reached the big picture.
Now, when I share in a meeting, I can tell my background story in a sentence or two. Then I move along to how I'm using the Al-Anon tools in my daily life. During my first few months in the program, I would be quite annoyed, disappointed, and frustrated when I heard members speaking about how they used Al-Anon tools when dealing with their friends or their co-workers. I would think: Friends? Work? You think those are problems?? Look at what I'm dealing with at home! I wanted to hear other dramatic stories like mine, from people who were as angry as I was. Sometimes I did hear those stories, but too many of the members in my group just had too darn much recovery.
Now, I'm one of those annoying people with calm or humorous stories about Al-Anon tools in my life. When appropriate, I apologize to newcomers about that. But it was all the listening I received, when I needed to tell my big-screen story over and over again, that allowed me to move beyond it. It does not dominate my thoughts. It's a short feature, not a blockbuster film. So now I am boring, and I love it!
I am taking a break from the Intimacy book this week -- maybe it will be back next week, but I take in one day at a time.
Fast forward, and hearing the quote from the welcome, thank God "we find it loses its poser to dominate our thoughts and our lives." But I was obsessed with my spouse/marriage and for a couple years could not control my thinking at all. I was constantly trying to figure out new ways to fix things and was not a peace.
Grateful member. :)
Thank you FT for your service, today's reading and to you and Lyne for both your ESH.
or we try to hold onto those happy situations that are sometime (from our
TGIF MIP Family!!
I too am a grateful member of Al-Anon/MIP in that I have learned that my situation/life is not unique when it comes
to living with alcoholism/active drinker.
I was reading today in the C2C (I am on July) that when we try to force issues in our favor it is like trying to force
a seedling to grow with our fingers
perspective) far and few is like trying to hold onto a hand full of water, both are quite impossible and very frustrating.
Al-Anon has taught me that it is to my advantage to live in the moment and be grateful for the lessons instead of
trying to control things that are not within my control, in that way there is less and hopefully no melodrama and life
can be more peaceful and focused on ourselves.
{{HUGS}}