For Monday, 9/13, the member talks about time as a special kind of checking account: there are 24 hours to spend, and they are precious. You can make a positive change and enrich your life by using the 12 Steps, HP, alanon meetings, people, calls, and literature. You can spend your time to grow, enjoy, improve, and learn from mistakes. You get a new start at living with each new 24 hours.
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I latched onto this reading this evening as it applies to what happened tonight. When my A disappears with lame excuses for what needs to be done outside the house, I am wise enough now to know this means its secret drinking time. But am I really wise? I started stewing, planning my confrontation, and making sure my A knows that I know exactly what is going on in reality. I felt my blood pressure going up and my anger growing. And then, I heard my sponsors words about pausing, thinking, praying, and why invite a fight that will have NO useful purpose whatsoever??? Then two of us will be upset and why? I let it go. I calmed down. I thought. I know Im married to an alcoholic and there are many reasons why I choose to stay. Nothing new is happening. I had cooked a beautiful dinner and we were able to sit in peace and enjoy it. Thats program at work. Grateful member.
DM2021 said
Sep 13, 2021
Thank you Lyne and TT for both your ESH and to you Lyne for your service and today's reading.
I do, indeed, encounter the same exact thing Lyne! I know when AH says he is going to the
fill the car up (way to often) that it means it is a trip to the liquor store and have grown accustomed to the
ritual and thankfully understand to never confront AH about it. Like you said "pausing, thinking,
praying, and why invite a fight that will have NO useful purpose whatsoever???
Grateful member as well!! TT I was so said this morning that I had to take down our hummingbird
feeder for the season, they have all left for their winter migration south and I will miss them!!
HP did indeed speak to me through those little birds and am reminded of the day, about a week ago,
that I was sitting on the porch where the feeder hung (about 3 feet from me) and I spoke to the
hummingbird on the feeder to tell it that I knew that it was preparing to leave soon and that I would
miss him. Twice that bird flew from the feeder right up to my face and responded to my lament,
just wow!!!
Freetime said
Sep 13, 2021
Thank you, Lyne, and thank you DM and TT for sharing so beautifully about using Al-Anon tools and philosophy in daily life.
About the hummingbirds -- I enjoy taking lessons from the natural world and creatures around me. I have learned so much from creatures both welcome and unwelcome. Reading about the hummingbirds' migration, it makes me think that they have a loving HP that is telling them to take care of themselves by going to a warmer climate, so they can live to return next year.
Skorpi said
Sep 13, 2021
Thank you Lyne for today's topic and for the ESH from everyone else.
Of late, the readings seem to be speaking to me exactly what I need to hear. I'm dealing with a difficult family situation right now, and focusing on what I can do to improve my life and ensure that I'm the best I can be for what comes next is how I've been living since last Wednesday. It has helped! Instead of staying home and being around AW as she did not prepare for guests she'd invited over at 3, I was up early, did the cleaning and food prep, and went to an AA picnic at a local club house with an Al-Anon friend. I was home by 3, at which point I was able to pull out all the prepped food, and not worry about how she'd decided to leave the house for guests. I'd already spent 6.5 hours getting things ready. The fact that she chose to spend her time sitting on the couch was not my problem, I didn't have to see it or think about it, and I was able to get a dose of program wisdom.
Today, as I prepare for a challenging meeting about the family situation, I'm doing my best to stay in the moment and not borrow trouble from tomorrow. I can enjoy my day today, be fully present for where I need to be, and let tomorrow take care of itself.
Daffodils said
Sep 13, 2021
Good Day All. Thanks Lyne for your service and the experience, strength and hummingbirds. :) I purchased a daytimer so I can create a schedule/lists of activities that cover all the spiritual food groups. Top of each page: triangle with HP at the top. Each day, readings/shares give me a practice I can put into action. As I read your share Skorpi, I thought of James Blanchard Cisneros ' quote "Once you awaken, you will have no interest in judging those who sleep ". My spirit is learning to gracefully navigate life thanks to Al-Anon and MIP.
serenity47 said
Sep 14, 2021
Thank you for the shares. Such a great reminder of letting go.
I to had a huge desire to let the qualifiers in my life know that I was not being fooled!
I would poke, prod, confront with the intent to get the "truth". What I would do differently with that truth if I ever got it I do not know! I guess I just wanted to be right.
It was an exhausting and a futile exercise.
I now know that I will be given all the information that I need in order to make the best decisions for myself. I dont have to go on the hunt for it.
For Monday, 9/13, the member talks about time as a special kind of checking account: there are 24 hours to spend, and they are precious. You can make a positive change and enrich your life by using the 12 Steps, HP, alanon meetings, people, calls, and literature. You can spend your time to grow, enjoy, improve, and learn from mistakes. You get a new start at living with each new 24 hours.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I latched onto this reading this evening as it applies to what happened tonight. When my A disappears with lame excuses for what needs to be done outside the house, I am wise enough now to know this means its secret drinking time. But am I really wise? I started stewing, planning my confrontation, and making sure my A knows that I know exactly what is going on in reality. I felt my blood pressure going up and my anger growing. And then, I heard my sponsors words about pausing, thinking, praying, and why invite a fight that will have NO useful purpose whatsoever??? Then two of us will be upset and why? I let it go. I calmed down. I thought. I know Im married to an alcoholic and there are many reasons why I choose to stay. Nothing new is happening. I had cooked a beautiful dinner and we were able to sit in peace and enjoy it. Thats program at work. Grateful member.
I do, indeed, encounter the same exact thing Lyne! I know when AH says he is going to the
fill the car up (way to often) that it means it is a trip to the liquor store and have grown accustomed to the
ritual and thankfully understand to never confront AH about it. Like you said "pausing, thinking,
praying, and why invite a fight that will have NO useful purpose whatsoever???
Grateful member as well!! TT I was so said this morning that I had to take down our hummingbird
feeder for the season, they have all left for their winter migration south and I will miss them!!
HP did indeed speak to me through those little birds and am reminded of the day, about a week ago,
that I was sitting on the porch where the feeder hung (about 3 feet from me) and I spoke to the
hummingbird on the feeder to tell it that I knew that it was preparing to leave soon and that I would
miss him. Twice that bird flew from the feeder right up to my face and responded to my lament,
just wow!!!
About the hummingbirds -- I enjoy taking lessons from the natural world and creatures around me. I have learned so much from creatures both welcome and unwelcome. Reading about the hummingbirds' migration, it makes me think that they have a loving HP that is telling them to take care of themselves by going to a warmer climate, so they can live to return next year.
Of late, the readings seem to be speaking to me exactly what I need to hear. I'm dealing with a difficult family situation right now, and focusing on what I can do to improve my life and ensure that I'm the best I can be for what comes next is how I've been living since last Wednesday. It has helped! Instead of staying home and being around AW as she did not prepare for guests she'd invited over at 3, I was up early, did the cleaning and food prep, and went to an AA picnic at a local club house with an Al-Anon friend. I was home by 3, at which point I was able to pull out all the prepped food, and not worry about how she'd decided to leave the house for guests. I'd already spent 6.5 hours getting things ready. The fact that she chose to spend her time sitting on the couch was not my problem, I didn't have to see it or think about it, and I was able to get a dose of program wisdom.
Today, as I prepare for a challenging meeting about the family situation, I'm doing my best to stay in the moment and not borrow trouble from tomorrow. I can enjoy my day today, be fully present for where I need to be, and let tomorrow take care of itself.
I to had a huge desire to let the qualifiers in my life know that I was not being fooled!
I would poke, prod, confront with the intent to get the "truth". What I would do differently with that truth if I ever got it I do not know! I guess I just wanted to be right.
It was an exhausting and a futile exercise.
I now know that I will be given all the information that I need in order to make the best decisions for myself. I dont have to go on the hunt for it.