Today's page notes that it is desperation over another's drinking that drives most of us to AlANon. Many are surprised when, instead of instruction on how to 'control' the alcoholic, the program provides guidance on how to dojust the opposite.
Some who find success in this approach mistakenly think their work is done when they get some relief from the insanity, and perhaps the alcoholic seeks recovery. In fact, AlAnon offers great rewards to those who approach the steps and principles as a way of life rather than crisis management.
Reminder: Alanon offers great value as a way of life regardless of whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not.
"Let me never forget how much ALAnon can do to make me a better person with a richer, fuller life. It gives me the means and the wisdom to serve others which I must have I order to fulfill myself." ---------------- Fortunately for me, the insight AlAnon provided was life changing right from the start, I was able to see how warped my whole approach was to people, places and things in my life. I saw there was much work to be done, but unlimited benefits if I stuck with it.
Progress is not linear, but it is unmistakeable. AlAnon works when I work it. So grateful for the wisdom and reminders
Lyne said
Jan 26, 2021
Thank you Paul for your service and for both shares which make a ton of sense! I came to program to learn how to fix my A and I could not see how messed up I was. It took awhile for everything to sink in, first of all, I cant fix anyone else, and secondly, I can fix myself if I am willing to do the work. My denial finally broke down and I could see how lost, confused, and upset I wastruly a train wreck running wild.
Fast forward, I dont think anything would have helped me except this program, and without it, I cant imagine how/where I would be today. Im so grateful for the tools and all of the people that help me everyday.
Debb said
Jan 26, 2021
Thank you as well Paul and to TT and Lyne.
It was an eureka moment for sure, when I landed on the steps of MIP. I agree with TT & Lyne, that I have learned to accept AH's drinking and am
working the program for myself so that I can live my own life outside of AH's decisions. I no longer look at my life as controlled by the chaos
and gaslighting and see that it can no longer affect me the way it did before Al-Anon. I am happy whether AH drinks or not, it is none of
by business what he does and am able to detach with love. I do see how Al-Anon principles and traditions have changed my outlook on
how I view people, places and things too, because the hurt that the alcoholic inflicted on my life is no longer the dominate factor anymore.
I am so grateful for the program and Al-Anon.
Iamhere said
Jan 26, 2021
Thank you Paul for your service and the daily. Thank you all for your shares & ESH. I really, really wanted 'the answers' when I arrived at Al-Anon. So much so that after my first meeting, I was angry when told to focus on me. I did not think I was a problem and had to go back for more 'life' and pain before I returned with the gift of desperation.
I have found Al-Anon to be life changing for me. I too had to do some soul-searching and find my truth - I had warped expectations and unrealistic definitions of love, marriage, relationships, honesty, and so much more. It is in recovery that I have come to 'see' that who I am is OK and who others are is also OK - even if we are opposite in so many things.
I am so grateful to have learned tools and more in recovery to help me deal with life on life's terms. I can actually cope today with more than I thought possible, and often with grace & dignity. I'm excited over progress and could care less about perfection. I am just a different person than I was before and very grateful for that.
Happy Tuesday all - today was my day to donate blood and I was not able to do so - my iron was too low. I'm registered to try again tomorrow. Hope each had a great day - (((Hugs))).
SunnyFrogs said
Jan 27, 2021
Thanks for all the shares here.
When I first came here I wasn't consistent, I mostly popped in when things were bad. Since the first of the year though I have been coming here every day, if I do not post I am at least reading posts. Something I just noticed a couple of days ago is when I do share, it's mostly about myself now whereas before it was always about AH. It has been such a gradual thing that I didn't really notice. I pray that I can/will continue to progress in this program and things will gradually change for me. I know it's gonna take time and I am finally ok with that. Before I would get so aggravated and frustrated because it wasn't instant.
I know this is going to be a lifetime thing for me. Yesterday was a rough day for me and I had a miserable day, it seemed like everything I have learned here and all the tools flew right out the window. I know it's gonna take practice,practice,practice and I also know I am not gonna always do things in the way I would like.
I have been dealing with and living with A's my entire life. Change is so hard but I am determined to keep working at this.
Today's page notes that it is desperation over another's drinking that drives most of us to AlANon. Many are surprised when, instead of instruction on how to 'control' the alcoholic, the program provides guidance on how to do just the opposite.
Some who find success in this approach mistakenly think their work is done when they get some relief from the insanity, and perhaps the alcoholic seeks recovery. In fact, AlAnon offers great rewards to those who approach the steps and principles as a way of life rather than crisis management.
Reminder: Alanon offers great value as a way of life regardless of whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not.
"Let me never forget how much ALAnon can do to make me a better person with a richer, fuller life. It gives me the means and the wisdom to serve others which I must have I order to fulfill myself."
----------------
Fortunately for me, the insight AlAnon provided was life changing right from the start, I was able to see how warped my whole approach was to people, places and things in my life. I saw there was much work to be done, but unlimited benefits if I stuck with it.
Progress is not linear, but it is unmistakeable. AlAnon works when I work it. So grateful for the wisdom and reminders
Fast forward, I dont think anything would have helped me except this program, and without it, I cant imagine how/where I would be today. Im so grateful for the tools and all of the people that help me everyday.
It was an eureka moment for sure, when I landed on the steps of MIP. I agree with TT & Lyne, that I have learned to accept AH's drinking and am
working the program for myself so that I can live my own life outside of AH's decisions. I no longer look at my life as controlled by the chaos
and gaslighting and see that it can no longer affect me the way it did before Al-Anon. I am happy whether AH drinks or not, it is none of
by business what he does and am able to detach with love. I do see how Al-Anon principles and traditions have changed my outlook on
how I view people, places and things too, because the hurt that the alcoholic inflicted on my life is no longer the dominate factor anymore.
I am so grateful for the program and Al-Anon.
I have found Al-Anon to be life changing for me. I too had to do some soul-searching and find my truth - I had warped expectations and unrealistic definitions of love, marriage, relationships, honesty, and so much more. It is in recovery that I have come to 'see' that who I am is OK and who others are is also OK - even if we are opposite in so many things.
I am so grateful to have learned tools and more in recovery to help me deal with life on life's terms. I can actually cope today with more than I thought possible, and often with grace & dignity. I'm excited over progress and could care less about perfection. I am just a different person than I was before and very grateful for that.
Happy Tuesday all - today was my day to donate blood and I was not able to do so - my iron was too low. I'm registered to try again tomorrow. Hope each had a great day - (((Hugs))).
When I first came here I wasn't consistent, I mostly popped in when things were bad. Since the first of the year though I have been coming here every day, if I do not post I am at least reading posts. Something I just noticed a couple of days ago is when I do share, it's mostly about myself now whereas before it was always about AH. It has been such a gradual thing that I didn't really notice. I pray that I can/will continue to progress in this program and things will gradually change for me. I know it's gonna take time and I am finally ok with that. Before I would get so aggravated and frustrated because it wasn't instant.
I know this is going to be a lifetime thing for me. Yesterday was a rough day for me and I had a miserable day, it seemed like everything I have learned here and all the tools flew right out the window. I know it's gonna take practice,practice,practice and I also know I am not gonna always do things in the way I would like.
I have been dealing with and living with A's my entire life. Change is so hard but I am determined to keep working at this.