Today is full of endless possibilities and dreams. In many cases, we are limited only by our fear and lack of hope, in others and ourselves. Each new day we are given a clean page to live in our book of life.
What freedom we find when we choose to practice the art of forgiveness. Forgiving others and ourselves will allow us to step into this new day as free human beings. What can really hurt us in the present if we have the key to daily forgiveness? What could our friend, boss, or enemy possibly say that would be worth the emotional price of on-going resentment?
Freedom is a gift we give ourselves every time we choose not to react to a hurtful comment. Holding on to old resentments keeps our creative energy trapped and stifled. Our choices are these: new freedom or old resentment. We choose new freedom. It is the gift we give ourselves when we choose not to let the sun rise on yesterday's script.
Today let me forgive everyone and anything - past and present - that might distract me from my spiritual growth.
Today's Quote: "It is the act of forgiveness that opens up the only possible way to think creatively about the future at all." -- Father Desmond Wilson
I like the thought that each day I have the freedom to start over. I do not need to hold onto old resentments. It is a great concept... but one that is sometimes hard to accomplish. The longer I am "In Program" the easier it has become to let go of resentments. By letting go of resentments, you are practicing Forgiveness. Sometimes, I find that I need to work on forgiving myself for not doing something either I know I should have, or that I did, but could've done much better. It is getting easier to recognize when I "could've and should've" myself.
Today, I am grateful for this program and this fellowship that helps me to Accept, Let Go, Forgive and embrace my Freedom! My journey is never perfect, and sometimes it is one step forward, and 3 steps back! But today I can forgive myself for those 3 steps back, and move forward in Grace.
I hope that you all continue with good health, and reach out and find your JOY this weekend!
&
mamalioness said
May 2, 2020
((((PnP)))) thank you for your service
the word "forgive" kind of sticks in my throat because the offender abused that to no end...to him?? you HAD to forgive him and then FORGET what he did and "business as usual" NOT to me it isn't....if they don't take responsibility, don't confess/feel sorrow, AND make amends to me, I don't forgive, but I AM working on, sincerely, to give up the resentments/bitternesses that only hurt me......so i "get around" that word by being willing and asking my HP to help me disolve the resentments/bitterness....I do it for ME...not the other....IF the relationship is worth it and its an honest human error, and they make amends??? no worries, i can completely let go and we can even restore relationship and even be closer, but willful betrayal, i cannot ever reconcile with that kind of offense....I can let go the hate, but i never will give them a 2nd chance....to me a mistake is human and we all do it. but a willful and deliberate betrayal, i can stop hating them, but never again do they get close enough to hurt me ever again....and I don't want to restore a relationship where trust is wiped out.....
JUST saying my 2 cents worth......
JerryF said
May 2, 2020
Thank you Ladies. The subject and memories of "getting it...getting and working forgiveness are powerful spiritual wonders for me". Of course there was a time I "wouldn't" and "didn't" cause there was so much more value for me not to. The anger and rage was apart of my personality so I took it everywhere I was. My friends and neighbors and community named me "crazy" and I didn't care...I didn't know other than I was born like that. I didn't have a safe future and then I had no idea about the AFG and the steps and traditions and slogans and fellowship with our ESH and unconditional love and support. A friend once suggested a movie in the theater which was titled "Mommy Dearest" and I went to see it sobbing from start to finish.
I am grateful for the program, my therapists and mostly my sponsor Don'T for teaching me what anger was like in my life, God I was a very sick puppy and getting sicker by the day. The 5th steps gave me reason to have and practice compassion and empathy for the victims of my rage and my rage lessened. Don.T explained to me and taught me how to "do the opposites"; the opposite of resentments are forgivenesses and then the rages ceased and I lost all reasons to hate and rage and my spirit got sane and quiet and the family around me asked "what's happened?". The answer was/is a smile.
HP still uses that sanity and recovery to me whenever He would like me to help others just as you have helped me. I once was given the opportunity to lead a "Non-violence" class for men jailed and imprisoned for domestic and public violence. One afternoon while I was coming home in traffic a truck pulled up next to me driven by a smiling former student. His wife was with him and a smiling infant and children in the back seat and it was great to see him. "How are you doing?" I asked and he replied, "Great...I haven't been in jail for 3 years". I'm still smiling at that and remembering, "When anyone anywhere reaches out for help I want the help of Al-Anon to always be there ...and for that I am responsible.
Thanks again ladies for your responsibility. (((((HUGS)))))
Maresie888 said
May 3, 2020
I work real hard on forgiving oeople for this COVID crisis. It certainly brings even mire chaos into my life. I also work really hard to forguve nyself. This has been a really hard year
This has also bern a year wherr i hsve had to make priorities. Every day
This COVID crisis has meant I have had to learn to be oatirnt and forgive how hard even the most basic task has become
Mresie
PosiesandPuppies said
May 3, 2020
(((Rose))))
I hear ya. And your 2 cents is valued!
Are there "unforgivable offenses?" When an adult preys on innocents (children), then yes, I believe some things can't be forgiven... or at the very least, forgotten. So when I speak of a reading about "Forgiveness," please know that I cannot lump everything under that umbrella.
But the reading speaks of "What would be worth the emotional price of ongoing resentment?" That is where this concept of "forgiveness" can come into play. The child-victim can help themselves emotionally heal by forgiving themselves - for being a "victim," for having the anger and resentments that naturally come with that kind of betrayal. To know and embrace that holding onto that anger/resentment will only hurt their soul... it will never affect the person who did the betraying.
I have read in your posts over the short time I have been on this forum, that you have worked hard to get to that place where you refuse to cause yourself anymore pain due to the anger/resentment that had built up over the heinous crimes perpetrated onto you by your father. I applaud you. There is no need for any justification IMHO. I could never truly understand, b/c that type of pain/offense has never happened to me. But I can empathize with the depth of that pain through your honest shares.You have found a way to heal yourself... I understand it is an ongoing path... and perhaps a long time coming... but you are so worth it!
As usual, I hope that you take what is useful and discard the rest.
Wishing you Peace, Rose!
-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Sunday 3rd of May 2020 12:40:40 PM
-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Sunday 3rd of May 2020 12:41:26 PM
-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Sunday 3rd of May 2020 12:42:57 PM
Maresie888 said
May 3, 2020
I try to forgive myself every day for not being able to do more.
The pressure to be super human is enormous.
Maresie
Today's reflection is taken from Today's Hope.
Today is full of endless possibilities and dreams. In many cases, we are limited only by our fear and lack of hope, in others and ourselves. Each new day we are given a clean page to live in our book of life.
What freedom we find when we choose to practice the art of forgiveness. Forgiving others and ourselves will allow us to step into this new day as free human beings. What can really hurt us in the present if we have the key to daily forgiveness? What could our friend, boss, or enemy possibly say that would be worth the emotional price of on-going resentment?
Freedom is a gift we give ourselves every time we choose not to react to a hurtful comment. Holding on to old resentments keeps our creative energy trapped and stifled. Our choices are these: new freedom or old resentment. We choose new freedom. It is the gift we give ourselves when we choose not to let the sun rise on yesterday's script.
Today let me forgive everyone and anything - past and present - that might distract me from my spiritual growth.
Today's Quote: "It is the act of forgiveness that opens up the only possible way to think creatively about the future at all." -- Father Desmond Wilson
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I like the thought that each day I have the freedom to start over. I do not need to hold onto old resentments. It is a great concept... but one that is sometimes hard to accomplish. The longer I am "In Program" the easier it has become to let go of resentments. By letting go of resentments, you are practicing Forgiveness. Sometimes, I find that I need to work on forgiving myself for not doing something either I know I should have, or that I did, but could've done much better. It is getting easier to recognize when I "could've and should've" myself.
Today, I am grateful for this program and this fellowship that helps me to Accept, Let Go, Forgive and embrace my Freedom! My journey is never perfect, and sometimes it is one step forward, and 3 steps back! But today I can forgive myself for those 3 steps back, and move forward in Grace.
I hope that you all continue with good health, and reach out and find your JOY this weekend!
the word "forgive" kind of sticks in my throat because the offender abused that to no end...to him?? you HAD to forgive him and then FORGET what he did and "business as usual" NOT to me it isn't....if they don't take responsibility, don't confess/feel sorrow, AND make amends to me, I don't forgive, but I AM working on, sincerely, to give up the resentments/bitternesses that only hurt me......so i "get around" that word by being willing and asking my HP to help me disolve the resentments/bitterness....I do it for ME...not the other....IF the relationship is worth it and its an honest human error, and they make amends??? no worries, i can completely let go and we can even restore relationship and even be closer, but willful betrayal, i cannot ever reconcile with that kind of offense....I can let go the hate, but i never will give them a 2nd chance....to me a mistake is human and we all do it. but a willful and deliberate betrayal, i can stop hating them, but never again do they get close enough to hurt me ever again....and I don't want to restore a relationship where trust is wiped out.....
JUST saying my 2 cents worth......
Thank you Ladies. The subject and memories of "getting it...getting and working forgiveness are powerful spiritual wonders for me". Of course there was a time I "wouldn't" and "didn't" cause there was so much more value for me not to. The anger and rage was apart of my personality so I took it everywhere I was. My friends and neighbors and community named me "crazy" and I didn't care...I didn't know other than I was born like that. I didn't have a safe future and then I had no idea about the AFG and the steps and traditions and slogans and fellowship with our ESH and unconditional love and support. A friend once suggested a movie in the theater which was titled "Mommy Dearest" and I went to see it sobbing from start to finish.
I am grateful for the program, my therapists and mostly my sponsor Don'T for teaching me what anger was like in my life, God I was a very sick puppy and getting sicker by the day. The 5th steps gave me reason to have and practice compassion and empathy for the victims of my rage and my rage lessened. Don.T explained to me and taught me how to "do the opposites"; the opposite of resentments are forgivenesses and then the rages ceased and I lost all reasons to hate and rage and my spirit got sane and quiet and the family around me asked "what's happened?". The answer was/is a smile.
HP still uses that sanity and recovery to me whenever He would like me to help others just as you have helped me. I once was given the opportunity to lead a "Non-violence" class for men jailed and imprisoned for domestic and public violence. One afternoon while I was coming home in traffic a truck pulled up next to me driven by a smiling former student. His wife was with him and a smiling infant and children in the back seat and it was great to see him. "How are you doing?" I asked and he replied, "Great...I haven't been in jail for 3 years". I'm still smiling at that and remembering, "When anyone anywhere reaches out for help I want the help of Al-Anon to always be there ...and for that I am responsible.
Thanks again ladies for your responsibility. (((((HUGS)))))
(((Rose))))
I hear ya. And your 2 cents is valued!
Are there "unforgivable offenses?"
When an adult preys on innocents (children), then yes, I believe some things can't be forgiven... or at the very least, forgotten. So when I speak of a reading about "Forgiveness," please know that I cannot lump everything under that umbrella.
But the reading speaks of "What would be worth the emotional price of ongoing resentment?" That is where this concept of "forgiveness" can come into play. The child-victim can help themselves emotionally heal by forgiving themselves - for being a "victim," for having the anger and resentments that naturally come with that kind of betrayal. To know and embrace that holding onto that anger/resentment will only hurt their soul... it will never affect the person who did the betraying.
I have read in your posts over the short time I have been on this forum, that you have worked hard to get to that place where you refuse to cause yourself anymore pain due to the anger/resentment that had built up over the heinous crimes perpetrated onto you by your father. I applaud you. There is no need for any justification IMHO. I could never truly understand, b/c that type of pain/offense has never happened to me. But I can empathize with the depth of that pain through your honest shares.You have found a way to heal yourself... I understand it is an ongoing path... and perhaps a long time coming... but you are so worth it!
As usual, I hope that you take what is useful and discard the rest.
Wishing you Peace, Rose!
-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Sunday 3rd of May 2020 12:40:40 PM
-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Sunday 3rd of May 2020 12:41:26 PM
-- Edited by PosiesandPuppies on Sunday 3rd of May 2020 12:42:57 PM