The 1st Step questions from the perspective of an Adult Child of an Alcoholic
flower19 said
Apr 9, 2020
Im having a little trouble applying what I went through as a child to the questions. I am trying the best I can. I feel like its not good enough like I need to convince myself it wasnt that bad. Like a week ago in my heart I genuinely believed the 1st step since Ive been in Al anon which is like a year and half ago and now Im thinking from my head.
DavidG said
Apr 10, 2020
Hmmm, yes, Flower... I am an adult child looking backwards now... and it has been some journey!
I think that the questions you raise, we all agonise about, and ponder upon. The fact that you are raising the
questions, I think, is a significant sign of growth. ...
JerryF said
Apr 11, 2020
As a child I was subject entirely to what the adults in my addicted family were telling me and leading me to accept. I could not have ideas, impressions, beliefs or perceptions unlike their own as they were the law, they were the rulers/teachers and I the unquestioning student like so many others like myself. My family like so many other Roman Catholic families made up the foundation of what we believed and did. If we decided different often we were strictly recited or punished. That was a large part of my up bringing and to do otherwise was disrespectful. It was that way also with the school teachers, nuns, brothers, priests and they held as much or more power over the young as did my parents. My mother once old me that when I was in school she handed total control over me to the faculty. It wasn't long before she had to add the police into the control group. My family was alcoholic/addict and I followed the line. My life was a insane mess until by the love and grace of HP and program tools such as literature, meetings, ESH, sponsorship and more that it began to change. The women in Al-Anon actually gave my mother the son she always wished she had. The was no finer group of ladies in my life than the 49-50 Alanoner women I came to learn from. (((((HUGS)))))
Im having a little trouble applying what I went through as a child to the questions. I am trying the best I can. I feel like its not good enough like I need to convince myself it wasnt that bad. Like a week ago in my heart I genuinely believed the 1st step since Ive been in Al anon which is like a year and half ago and now Im thinking from my head.
Hmmm, yes, Flower... I am an adult child looking backwards now... and it has been some journey!
I think that the questions you raise, we all agonise about, and ponder upon. The fact that you are raising the
questions, I think, is a significant sign of growth.
...
As a child I was subject entirely to what the adults in my addicted family were telling me and leading me to accept. I could not have ideas, impressions, beliefs or perceptions unlike their own as they were the law, they were the rulers/teachers and I the unquestioning student like so many others like myself. My family like so many other Roman Catholic families made up the foundation of what we believed and did. If we decided different often we were strictly recited or punished. That was a large part of my up bringing and to do otherwise was disrespectful. It was that way also with the school teachers, nuns, brothers, priests and they held as much or more power over the young as did my parents. My mother once old me that when I was in school she handed total control over me to the faculty. It wasn't long before she had to add the police into the control group. My family was alcoholic/addict and I followed the line. My life was a insane mess until by the love and grace of HP and program tools such as literature, meetings, ESH, sponsorship and more that it began to change. The women in Al-Anon actually gave my mother the son she always wished she had. The was no finer group of ladies in my life than the 49-50 Alanoner women I came to learn from. (((((HUGS)))))