I've been reading old posts here lately. Last night I was reading some from 2005 and it kinda surprised me that they weren't really that much different than current ones.
When I came here I felt so alone and like my situation is somehow worse or different than others. But reading old posts shows me otherwise.
I found comfort in that. I also found comfort in the way this program has been/stayed the same throughout the years. The ESH shared then is the same,as well as the slogans,the steps,etc.
I guess I expected it to be like being told that coffee is harmful but then hearing it's good for you(or eggs,wine,whatever). Or as different as landline phones vs cell phones. It's consistent though,it's stable,it's reliable and predictable.
And I like that,especially when everything else in my life seems so chaotic.
Iamhere said
Feb 5, 2020
Lovely share SF and I so, so relate and agree! What's so lovely for my recovery and I is that when I do reach out, I can/do receive support and ESH. The more I practice, the better my days feel and are. It really does work, as designed, when we work it! Glad you're here and a part of my journey!! (((Hugs)))
Bo said
Feb 5, 2020
Very, very true...a friend of mine said her struggle is the same every single day, perhaps different triggers and stresses, but conceptually the same struggle...Just for today, she doesn't drink...and she does so one day at a time.
For me, every single day -- I stay on my side of the street, I pay attention to my side of the street, I clean my side of the street. I focus on making healthy decisions, and living my life the right way. I make sure I check my motives. I focus on not controlling, not forcing my will, and not wanting to be right. I focus on not accepting unacceptable behavior. And more. Just for today, and I do so one day at a time. I live my life with clarity and integrity.
Freetime said
Feb 5, 2020
Sunny, I also appreciate how the program is consistent and reliable and has been working for so many years. It is comforting to hear the same readings that open and close every meeting, the rituals like saying "hi" to each person, etc. It's wonderful to be able to count on something.
I remember when my life was chaotic, I would be rattled when a meeting did something different than I was used to -- after all, each meeting is autonomous. I also remember thinking I could make edits/improvements in the wording of some of the traditional readings that I thought weren't clear enough. As I have worked the program and recovered more, I find myself more flexible and appreciative of differences in various meetings, and not needing to "fix" the program to help imaginary others who I thought needed my help to make the readings easier for them. But I still appreciate the traditions that stay the same, even though we can have slight differences within the same general format.
I'm glad all of us are on this journey together!
PosiesandPuppies said
Feb 5, 2020
Glad you shared that, SunnyF!
It is very true. I saw it in my Nar-Anon meetings (way back), and I see it now. It is one of the main reasons I really embraced, "What did I want?" and Acceptance this time around in the Programs. It was so, so hard to begin to think of myself first! My needs, my wants (besides, the "I want my old husband back'). But I feel it was essential for me to figure that out, otherwise I could be living with the addictive chaos for the rest of my life! It was super hard to accept that I had no control over that chaos... just my response to it! I still see some chaos - in the fringes (b/c we share a kid), but now I am better at not engaging, and accepting that it is "Not my monkey's, not my circus." I am not perfect (far from) but I work on not trying to "Fix," and not Controlling anyone/thing but myself, and I must say, I am forever grateful for the tools and the support that Al-Anon provides!
SunnyFrogs said
Feb 6, 2020
Thanks guys!
Bo said
Feb 6, 2020
Nothing changes if nothing changes.
Who is that statement really about?
Things That Make You Go Hmmm...
LOL.
JerryF said
Feb 7, 2020
Thank You!! Sunny....I am so grateful for your post. It reminds me that when I keep working what works; it will continue to work and I will continue to be happy, joyous and free. (((((mmmmm)))))
I've been reading old posts here lately. Last night I was reading some from 2005 and it kinda surprised me that they weren't really that much different than current ones.
When I came here I felt so alone and like my situation is somehow worse or different than others. But reading old posts shows me otherwise.
I found comfort in that. I also found comfort in the way this program has been/stayed the same throughout the years. The ESH shared then is the same,as well as the slogans,the steps,etc.
I guess I expected it to be like being told that coffee is harmful but then hearing it's good for you(or eggs,wine,whatever). Or as different as landline phones vs cell phones. It's consistent though,it's stable,it's reliable and predictable.
And I like that,especially when everything else in my life seems so chaotic.
For me, every single day -- I stay on my side of the street, I pay attention to my side of the street, I clean my side of the street. I focus on making healthy decisions, and living my life the right way. I make sure I check my motives. I focus on not controlling, not forcing my will, and not wanting to be right. I focus on not accepting unacceptable behavior. And more. Just for today, and I do so one day at a time. I live my life with clarity and integrity.
I remember when my life was chaotic, I would be rattled when a meeting did something different than I was used to -- after all, each meeting is autonomous. I also remember thinking I could make edits/improvements in the wording of some of the traditional readings that I thought weren't clear enough. As I have worked the program and recovered more, I find myself more flexible and appreciative of differences in various meetings, and not needing to "fix" the program to help imaginary others who I thought needed my help to make the readings easier for them.
I'm glad all of us are on this journey together!
Glad you shared that, SunnyF!
It is very true. I saw it in my Nar-Anon meetings (way back), and I see it now. It is one of the main reasons I really embraced, "What did I want?" and Acceptance this time around in the Programs. It was so, so hard to begin to think of myself first! My needs, my wants (besides, the "I want my old husband back').
But I feel it was essential for me to figure that out, otherwise I could be living with the addictive chaos for the rest of my life! It was super hard to accept that I had no control over that chaos... just my response to it!
I still see some chaos - in the fringes (b/c we share a kid), but now I am better at not engaging, and accepting that it is "Not my monkey's, not my circus." I am not perfect (far from) but I work on not trying to "Fix," and not Controlling anyone/thing but myself, and I must say, I am forever grateful for the tools and the support that Al-Anon provides!
Who is that statement really about?
Things That Make You Go Hmmm...
LOL.
Thank You!! Sunny....I am so grateful for your post. It reminds me that when I keep working what works; it will continue to work and I will continue to be happy, joyous and free. (((((mmmmm)))))
