For Monday, 10/28, the author discusses their attitudes towards others, both negative and positive. They note when they accept someone unconditionally, they feel safer. On the other hand, when defensive and impatient, the author expects others to be unkind to them. The writer says its in their best interest, to treat others as they wish to be treated.
Reminder: There is something for me to learn from every interaction I have with other people. I will make an extra effort today to take note of the attitudes Im giving and receiving because they both can teach me about myself.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I try my best to treat others as I wish to be treated. I find I feel self-respect when I can accomplish that. Ive also found that if a negative situation is unfolding, to treat the other person with calm kindness, often diffuses the situation. If one person wants to fight, and the receiver doesnt jump on the band wagon, there wont be a fight. And I can always walk away with dignity without stooping to their level. I like choosing behaviors that enhance my self-respect. Its hard learning to be a mature, grown up, but I am definitely trying. Lyne
DavidG said
Oct 27, 2019
Thanks Lyne...
I had a show-down day with my SO yesterday. It was exactly the same sort of show-down we have had together- for thrrr, going on four decades! Unresolved and unresolvable. Lots of blame and shame being shovelled in my direction. My stuff? Not my stuff? I have never ever been sure.
I breathed- and practised detachment, the best way I knew how... ...and the issue was resolved before the end of the day. Years past- I used to think of the saying "Don't let the sun go down on your anger!" That was always a forlorn hope, really. Just a sad sick repeat of my own FOO.
So I am not too sure what worked here. Maybe SO just got sick of fighting? Anyways- I was always hoping to become a wise older person! ...and over time it shall emerge- what just happens on the run- ...emerge some healthy family culture...
-thanks... ...
hotrod said
Oct 28, 2019
hood MORNING MIP Love this reminder that what i put out comes back. i really love how the reading points out that it is in our own best interest, to treat others as we wish to be treated. i have found this to be so true.
Thanks or your service Lyne
PosiesandPuppies said
Oct 28, 2019
Thank you Lyne for your service. I love how you keep seeing noticeable changes in you!!
Wonderful shares as well, David and Betty.
I too, love the reminder of what we put out comes back to us! I have always followed this "rule" - or at least tried very hard to. I think it's b/c I grew up at a time that the "Golden Rule" was really emphasized in both my household and Sunday School. Sadly, it really was in vain with my Ex. The disease of Addiction is just too selfish and self-serving for the affected one to take notice of what you are doing (positively). And sometimes I had to check my motives with this "good" behavior, b/c it can bring resentment for me ( I am doing this, now my spouse should react in kind... very rarely happened = resentment.)
At least I now know that I modeled some pretty good behavior for my Kid as he grew!
&
El said
Oct 28, 2019
Thank you, Lyne and all who shared! I have found that when I respond with kindness or not respond at all....the situation is improved! Even if I want to retort and "let them know what's what!" it works out better to not engage. I don't think one can ever go wrong with kindness. If nothing else, it models another way of communicating.
Have a great Monday......sunny and mid 60s here today in western New York state.....we'll take it!
Ellen
Maresie888 said
Oct 31, 2019
I think one of the things I do is to treat others better than me. Last night I was working late with a new group.of people. They thanked me for helping them
I have to say in most relationships I have been in the other party felt entitled to drain me to zero.
There is giving and there is giving till you drop. I had so mb e misguided idea if I gave my #all# it woukd help
I gave more than I had on so many levels
Then I had nothing left for me.
So the way I would like to be treated is with measure. Measures to make room for #me#.
One of my friends pointed out to me that I feel guilty when I see other struggling
I feel like I have to step in. When I dont have #it# to give self preservation is essential. Now I have to practice that self preservation first
Maresie
For Monday, 10/28, the author discusses their attitudes towards others, both negative and positive. They note when they accept someone unconditionally, they feel safer. On the other hand, when defensive and impatient, the author expects others to be unkind to them. The writer says its in their best interest, to treat others as they wish to be treated.
Reminder: There is something for me to learn from every interaction I have with other people. I will make an extra effort today to take note of the attitudes Im giving and receiving because they both can teach me about myself.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I try my best to treat others as I wish to be treated. I find I feel self-respect when I can accomplish that. Ive also found that if a negative situation is unfolding, to treat the other person with calm kindness, often diffuses the situation. If one person wants to fight, and the receiver doesnt jump on the band wagon, there wont be a fight. And I can always walk away with dignity without stooping to their level. I like choosing behaviors that enhance my self-respect. Its hard learning to be a mature, grown up, but I am definitely trying. Lyne
I had a show-down day with my SO yesterday. It was exactly the same sort of show-down we have had together- for thrrr, going on four decades! Unresolved and unresolvable. Lots of blame and shame being shovelled in my direction. My stuff? Not my stuff? I have never ever been sure.
I breathed- and practised detachment, the best way I knew how... ...and the issue was resolved before the end of the day. Years past- I used to think of the saying "Don't let the sun go down on your anger!" That was always a forlorn hope, really. Just a sad sick repeat of my own FOO.
So I am not too sure what worked here. Maybe SO just got sick of fighting? Anyways- I was always hoping to become a wise older person!
...and over time it shall emerge- what just happens on the run- ...emerge some healthy family culture...
-thanks...
...
hood MORNING MIP Love this reminder that what i put out comes back. i really love how the reading points out that it is in our own best interest, to treat others as we wish to be treated. i have found this to be so true.
Thanks or your service Lyne
Wonderful shares as well, David and Betty.
I too, love the reminder of what we put out comes back to us! I have always followed this "rule" - or at least tried very hard to. I think it's b/c I grew up at a time that the "Golden Rule" was really emphasized in both my household and Sunday School. Sadly, it really was in vain with my Ex. The disease of Addiction is just too selfish and self-serving for the affected one to take notice of what you are doing (positively). And sometimes I had to check my motives with this "good" behavior, b/c it can bring resentment for me ( I am doing this, now my spouse should react in kind... very rarely happened = resentment.)
At least I now know that I modeled some pretty good behavior for my Kid as he grew!
Thank you, Lyne and all who shared! I have found that when I respond with kindness or not respond at all....the situation is improved! Even if I want to retort and "let them know what's what!" it works out better to not engage. I don't think one can ever go wrong with kindness. If nothing else, it models another way of communicating.
Have a great Monday......sunny and mid 60s here today in western New York state.....we'll take it!
Ellen