I seem to be having this particular life lesson a LOT recently. I just had to laugh at some of the not so silly and the silliness of it all.
Maybe it's the absurdity. I have been trying to rebalance my life and my sig other is def a big part and in the picture .. lol. We are going on our first actual trip together which will be fun, although I'm also a little stressed because I see the markers on some of it. I have done this trip multiple times with just the kids. We have always had a good time. We are having to add another hour on to the trip because my oldest is staying with his best friend. I'm def a get there kind of person while I want to enjoy the ride because it was just me I was very focused on let's keep moving. I was to afraid to stop for the simple fact if I stop I'm going to not want to move further forward.
So he's driving, lol .. my control issue. He's nitpicking and I found out that this is the first long distance drive he's even done with family. Soooo .. now some of it is making a LOT of sense. His acting out before the trip, nervous and excited and wanted to reroute our trip which I about had a fit about because this is a direct drive .. overnight and back home. It's a LONG drive 14 - 15 hours with the kids it's actually faster when I go home as it's normally just me. I am adjusting my sails now for the fact we are going to stop, we are going to have a nice time and we are not going to stress .. LOL.
I'm also finding I am a little more aware of money these days. I'm really trying to do the whole Dave Ramsey stuff and it's been working very well however I have a LONG ways to go. So that's been a big deal and positive. It's been a painful reality check in many ways. Nothing like working on yourself and realizing it's a drop in the bucket of where you want to be as a responsible adult .. lol.
Anyway, I do want to stop and do something fun just us on the way home. I have something picked out when we go home with the kids so I'm super excited about that however it will add time to the trip. My honey seems to believe we have 3 - 4 days to complete the trip and that is not the case. The other funny part is I would like next year to do a family family trip with these folks as they are some of my best friends and of course my youngest is bff's with their youngest. That's a whole other funny funny story that I won't get into .. needless to say .. we have two totally different ideas going on. I am inclusive he's exclusive. That is def a perception/agenda issue though and it is interesting to observe when I have a chance to step back and not be emotionally reactive.
I have really forced this man outside of his comfort zone and we had that discussion earlier as again I'm social and he's not. I haven't been as much however some of that is just me at the moment I'm in some mental down time. He always has a good time after the fact (it's a little bit like dealing with my youngest .. LOL .. I'm going I'm not going to have a good time and tell you!) In the end he enjoys it. I know him well enough to know what I will deal with in the next 2 weeks is pretty much just a precursor to the fact that I have pushed him outside his comfort zone. LOL! I have to remember that fact though when stuff comes up to and that whole how important is it. I can address it or not .. unless it's a grievous issue I think I can just let it go.
The last couple of days has been entertaining. LOL. Still 2 weeks to go .. LOL.
El said
Jul 18, 2019
Have a great time! I am sure you will learn a lot on this first trip together! Relax and let it flow......you will have much fun and can't wait to hear how it turned out!
Ellen
Temple said
Jul 18, 2019
Dear One
You did not ask for advice.
Here goes anyway--disclaimer, disclaimer.
You drive. Then you won't feel so homicidal.
Disclaimer Disclaimer.
You've got this and I can't help myself.
Hugs, Temple
-- Edited by Temple on Thursday 18th of July 2019 03:43:59 PM
andromeda said
Jul 18, 2019
ROFLOL at what Temple had to say! OMG, that cracks me up!
Have a great time and remember to BREATHE and say the Serenity Prayer whenever you need it. I'm taking a 5 day trip with my bf and two of our friends on Saturday and this is a big trip for him as he has never left the country. So, I think my bf is a bit stressed about leaving his dog in the care of my son among other things. Anyway, I'm doing the best I can to let go and remember he has a different perspective than I do.....just as you are noting about your bf.
I truly think all will be well.
Funny aside story.....my son is a true introvert. I dragged him to a BBQ for the 4th of July where I knew my friend and her bf, who was the host, but no-one else. Her bf is an anesthesiologist and most of the folks there were doctors or people he knew from his driving clubs (he collects sports cars). Anyway, my son was intimidated but I begged him to just relax. We get there and after 5 minutes of introductions, I left him to go use the bathroom. I come out 2 minutes later and he's having a brilliant discussion with another anesthesiologist doctor. He sat with this guy and another doc for dinner leaving me in the lurch, lol. I sat and met some other folks outside at a different table. Come back and 30 minutes later I hear one of the docs giving my son life advice and there's my kid just chatting away about his goals, what he's interested in, asking them questions about their career paths, etc. i love seeing people come out of their comfort zone and realize that the world isn't actually coming to an end. Go figure!
With 2 different perceptions.
I seem to be having this particular life lesson a LOT recently. I just had to laugh at some of the not so silly and the silliness of it all.
Maybe it's the absurdity. I have been trying to rebalance my life and my sig other is def a big part and in the picture .. lol. We are going on our first actual trip together which will be fun, although I'm also a little stressed because I see the markers on some of it. I have done this trip multiple times with just the kids. We have always had a good time. We are having to add another hour on to the trip because my oldest is staying with his best friend. I'm def a get there kind of person while I want to enjoy the ride because it was just me I was very focused on let's keep moving. I was to afraid to stop for the simple fact if I stop I'm going to not want to move further forward.
So he's driving, lol .. my control issue. He's nitpicking and I found out that this is the first long distance drive he's even done with family. Soooo .. now some of it is making a LOT of sense. His acting out before the trip, nervous and excited and wanted to reroute our trip which I about had a fit about because this is a direct drive .. overnight and back home. It's a LONG drive 14 - 15 hours with the kids it's actually faster when I go home as it's normally just me. I am adjusting my sails now for the fact we are going to stop, we are going to have a nice time and we are not going to stress .. LOL.
I'm also finding I am a little more aware of money these days. I'm really trying to do the whole Dave Ramsey stuff and it's been working very well however I have a LONG ways to go. So that's been a big deal and positive. It's been a painful reality check in many ways. Nothing like working on yourself and realizing it's a drop in the bucket of where you want to be as a responsible adult .. lol.
Anyway, I do want to stop and do something fun just us on the way home. I have something picked out when we go home with the kids so I'm super excited about that however it will add time to the trip. My honey seems to believe we have 3 - 4 days to complete the trip and that is not the case. The other funny part is I would like next year to do a family family trip with these folks as they are some of my best friends and of course my youngest is bff's with their youngest. That's a whole other funny funny story that I won't get into .. needless to say .. we have two totally different ideas going on. I am inclusive he's exclusive. That is def a perception/agenda issue though and it is interesting to observe when I have a chance to step back and not be emotionally reactive.
I have really forced this man outside of his comfort zone and we had that discussion earlier as again I'm social and he's not. I haven't been as much however some of that is just me at the moment I'm in some mental down time. He always has a good time after the fact (it's a little bit like dealing with my youngest .. LOL .. I'm going I'm not going to have a good time and tell you!) In the end he enjoys it. I know him well enough to know what I will deal with in the next 2 weeks is pretty much just a precursor to the fact that I have pushed him outside his comfort zone. LOL! I have to remember that fact though when stuff comes up to and that whole how important is it. I can address it or not .. unless it's a grievous issue I think I can just let it go.
The last couple of days has been entertaining. LOL. Still 2 weeks to go .. LOL.
Have a great time! I am sure you will learn a lot on this first trip together! Relax and let it flow......you will have much fun and can't wait to hear how it turned out!
Ellen
Dear One
You did not ask for advice.
Here goes anyway--disclaimer, disclaimer.
You drive. Then you won't feel so homicidal.
Disclaimer Disclaimer.
You've got this and I can't help myself.
Hugs,
Temple
-- Edited by Temple on Thursday 18th of July 2019 03:43:59 PM
Have a great time and remember to BREATHE and say the Serenity Prayer whenever you need it. I'm taking a 5 day trip with my bf and two of our friends on Saturday and this is a big trip for him as he has never left the country. So, I think my bf is a bit stressed about leaving his dog in the care of my son among other things. Anyway, I'm doing the best I can to let go and remember he has a different perspective than I do.....just as you are noting about your bf.
I truly think all will be well.
Funny aside story.....my son is a true introvert. I dragged him to a BBQ for the 4th of July where I knew my friend and her bf, who was the host, but no-one else. Her bf is an anesthesiologist and most of the folks there were doctors or people he knew from his driving clubs (he collects sports cars). Anyway, my son was intimidated but I begged him to just relax. We get there and after 5 minutes of introductions, I left him to go use the bathroom. I come out 2 minutes later and he's having a brilliant discussion with another anesthesiologist doctor. He sat with this guy and another doc for dinner leaving me in the lurch, lol. I sat and met some other folks outside at a different table. Come back and 30 minutes later I hear one of the docs giving my son life advice and there's my kid just chatting away about his goals, what he's interested in, asking them questions about their career paths, etc. i love seeing people come out of their comfort zone and realize that the world isn't actually coming to an end. Go figure!