I was reading an interesting book when I cam across these questions which the author says he poses to himself each day:
1. What does this have to do with the agenda of my soul? (Before partaking in any activity, discussion, decision, etc.) 2. Is there any part of what I am now seeing "over there" that I have seen "over here" in myself? (To be used when judging something or someone - good or bad.) 3. Is this what I want the world to hear from God right now? (When speaking remembering that we are all a part of or one with HP, and thus that means what passes our lips is what's passing from HP's lips.)
Finally, it wasn't a question in his daily toolkit, but another that I really loved when it came down to finding ourselves harshly judging someone, regardless the reason: "What hurts you so much that you feel you have to hurt others in order to heal it?"
I feel they're all pretty thought-provoking. I wonder what it would look like just remembering to ask even ONE of those questions each day - I'm on auto-pilot a whole lot!
Lyne said
Jun 21, 2019
Hello Aloha-Are these by any chance from CAL? They remind me of some of my alanon tools, THINK and focus on myself. A question I found on the board one day and have remembered for several years, is that if I know the answer to a question, don't ask. I like that one very much, Lyne
Aloha said
Jun 21, 2019
HI Lyne - unfortunately it's not CAL. If you want I can send you a private message with the book title and author.
I did like that section of his book, however, as it follows along Al-Anon principles of keeping our side of the fence clean. I think we ask these same questions in Al-Anon, as well, just worded in different ways. For whatever reason, the particular wording and suggestion of this sort of daily inventory just stood out to me.
I like that thought you shared, too, Lyne - if you know the answer already, don't ask! (Can't tell you how many arguments that thought kept me out of!)
canadianguy said
Jun 21, 2019
Aloha... those are awesome (particularly the first three - the last one is a bit passive-aggressive for my liking, as it kind of allows you to take a shot at the person, whereas the first three feel very much like we are looking internally)
Love the sentiment, and great reminders for our daily walk!
Hugs,
Tom
El said
Jun 21, 2019
I love the first question! Thank you for sharing with us!
DavidG said
Jun 21, 2019
That's an awesome list Aloha... ...
this week I more or less made up a new word- god-sister. She is the daughter of my dearly loved godmother.
I hadn't had contact with her for many, many years... but in recent years my oughts had gone back to her and her sister frequently. An old photo showed up on our facebook nostalgia page- which triggered me. Our "mother" and 'father' had no kids of their own- and adopted two. But their first attempt fell over when "Steve" was retrieved by his birth mother.
I got some good nurturing in that family. It makes a big difference to me, in later life, to think of this.
My god-sister has had "issues" which I am not going to disclose here. But we actually fitted together like a hand in a glove. It was awesome!
1. What does this have to do with the agenda of my soul?
Your first question, Aroha. Charity does begin at home- and with those closest to us... and our issues are much more relevant here, too.
Feeding this back to our group- and to family of choice- something to celebrate...
Aroha mai, aroha atu... huri mai...
Giving and receiving love can transform us... ...
Have read the sources and readings- within our three daily readers- for many years.
But few, for me, were as powerful as your three pointers this morning...
Kia ora,
Thanks.
PosiesandPuppies said
Jun 22, 2019
Thank you, Aloha for posting these. All very thought-provoking questions.
Like you, sometimes I am on auto-pilot, so remembering to ask these questions of myself can be a challenge! LOL! But that does not mean I shouldn't try!!!
I actually like the added one. In my Step 4, I came to realize that I do A LOT of judging. I just don't verbalize it to others. And it's not a "biggie" (say, like bigotry), but just little things, like "Wow! That was a bold fashion choice!" or comments about the way people drive. The last question reminded me of how I do my daily inventory regarding this... when I catch myself doing this, I ask myself, "What fear or hurt are you trying to shield by making fun/commenting on others? And how would you feel if they all could hear you?"
Well, of course I would be mortified, b/c deep down in my heart, I wish no harm to anyone.
This allows me to then ask myself, "OK, then why say anything (to myself) at all? You are just feeding the negative monster inside you!"
As I typed this, I just realized that my last typed line could be directly tied to "What does this have to do with the agenda of my soul?"
KABOOM! Mind blown!
Aloha said
Jun 24, 2019
Glad you're all enjoying the questions. :)
I felt the same way about the added question. It's not really, in my head, aimed at asking someone who's being hurtful to me -it's for me to ask myself what's going on deep down when I find myself being critical of others.
Although that question can be utilized in a way to remind myself that if someone is being hurtful to me that they're truly hurting deep down themselves.
I was reading an interesting book when I cam across these questions which the author says he poses to himself each day:
1. What does this have to do with the agenda of my soul? (Before partaking in any activity, discussion, decision, etc.)
2. Is there any part of what I am now seeing "over there" that I have seen "over here" in myself? (To be used when judging something or someone - good or bad.)
3. Is this what I want the world to hear from God right now? (When speaking remembering that we are all a part of or one with HP, and thus that means what passes our lips is what's passing from HP's lips.)
Finally, it wasn't a question in his daily toolkit, but another that I really loved when it came down to finding ourselves harshly judging someone, regardless the reason: "What hurts you so much that you feel you have to hurt others in order to heal it?"
I feel they're all pretty thought-provoking. I wonder what it would look like just remembering to ask even ONE of those questions each day - I'm on auto-pilot a whole lot!
I did like that section of his book, however, as it follows along Al-Anon principles of keeping our side of the fence clean. I think we ask these same questions in Al-Anon, as well, just worded in different ways. For whatever reason, the particular wording and suggestion of this sort of daily inventory just stood out to me.
I like that thought you shared, too, Lyne - if you know the answer already, don't ask! (Can't tell you how many arguments that thought kept me out of!)
Aloha... those are awesome (particularly the first three - the last one is a bit passive-aggressive for my liking, as it kind of allows you to take a shot at the person, whereas the first three feel very much like we are looking internally)
Love the sentiment, and great reminders for our daily walk!
Hugs,
Tom
I love the first question! Thank you for sharing with us!
That's an awesome list Aloha...
...
this week I more or less made up a new word- god-sister. She is the daughter of my dearly loved godmother.
I hadn't had contact with her for many, many years... but in recent years my oughts had gone back to her and her sister frequently. An old photo showed up on our facebook nostalgia page- which triggered me. Our "mother" and 'father' had no kids of their own- and adopted two. But their first attempt fell over when "Steve" was retrieved by his birth mother.
I got some good nurturing in that family. It makes a big difference to me, in later life, to think of this.
My god-sister has had "issues" which I am not going to disclose here. But we actually fitted together like a hand in a glove. It was awesome!
1. What does this have to do with the agenda of my soul?
Your first question, Aroha. Charity does begin at home- and with those closest to us... and our issues are much more relevant here, too.
Feeding this back to our group- and to family of choice- something to celebrate...
Aroha mai, aroha atu... huri mai...
Giving and receiving love can transform us...
...
Have read the sources and readings- within our three daily readers- for many years.
But few, for me, were as powerful as your three pointers this morning...
Kia ora,
Thanks.
Thank you, Aloha for posting these. All very thought-provoking questions.
Like you, sometimes I am on auto-pilot, so remembering to ask these questions of myself can be a challenge! LOL! But that does not mean I shouldn't try!!!
I actually like the added one. In my Step 4, I came to realize that I do A LOT of judging. I just don't verbalize it to others. And it's not a "biggie" (say, like bigotry), but just little things, like "Wow! That was a bold fashion choice!" or comments about the way people drive. The last question reminded me of how I do my daily inventory regarding this... when I catch myself doing this, I ask myself, "What fear or hurt are you trying to shield by making fun/commenting on others? And how would you feel if they all could hear you?"
Well, of course I would be mortified, b/c deep down in my heart, I wish no harm to anyone.
This allows me to then ask myself, "OK, then why say anything (to myself) at all? You are just feeding the negative monster inside you!"
As I typed this, I just realized that my last typed line could be directly tied to "What does this have to do with the agenda of my soul?"
KABOOM! Mind blown!
I felt the same way about the added question. It's not really, in my head, aimed at asking someone who's being hurtful to me -it's for me to ask myself what's going on deep down when I find myself being critical of others.
Although that question can be utilized in a way to remind myself that if someone is being hurtful to me that they're truly hurting deep down themselves.