Hi y'all  

Coming up 36 years in Alanon... I am blessed, truly blessed to be here... it was hard at first- and nothing seemed to happen. "now, if not sooner" seems to be the motto at that stage.

I am 13 or 14 in this photo. A wee squirt. By age 20 I was 5'6"...

This was our family home- our kitchen. I had gotten a part time job harvesting carrots. I used some of the money to buy a desk to do my studies on. The desk is to my right. I never actually used the desk. I never really ever studied. I read a book a day for years- and got a great vocab... but study eluded me.

I think there was far too much going on in my world at the time.

I recall one Sunday being in that room. Adults and friends were sitting around the table drinking. There was roast mutton in the oven, and in due course I peeled potatoes and included those. In my world we never ever went hungry- there was an abundance of fresh food!

Later I put some veges on- it must have been 12.30...

Nothing happened. I had to watch and wait until 4 pm. The roast had shrunk and had the constituency of a lump of iron. ...

The next time round I made potato fritters. Us kids entertained ourselves making them. We had plenty of mutton fat and spuds.

David,

I love old photos and the stories that go with them!  Congratulations on your anniversary in alanon!

I have a picture of me as a very little girl sitting on my dads lap at my grandmothers house. We are sitting in front of a beautiful, yet simple small hutch/ cabinet that now sits in my dining room.  The memories it evokes brings so much happiness to me.

Thank you for sharing.  Loved the picture!

Ellen

  Thanks El...

                        when I was 15 a man came to scoll and spoke to us boys. He was from AA. He talked about himself- which was very unusual for me. It left an indelible impression. Awe and respect for that person. I am so grateful for this experience and the insight it gave me- early on...

...I have sat in the rooms with people- whose homes were spotless- and kept that way- by the minute!  ...

Mahalo David for the vision kind of like reading from Bill and Dr. Bob.  For me I don't like shoveling around in the past; much to much darkness, spiders and snakes.  When working with Don.T my awesome sponsor on inventory I told him finding the door to my past was like finding a door in my pitch black bedroom as I knew how to do that as a kid.  "Walk toward the wall in my room and then with my hand on the wall keep feeling till I felt a door jamb...find the door knob, turn the knob and open the door.  "What did you find when you did that"? he asked and I told him, "another door".  I was afraid of finding a monster which was just as bad as another door most times.  

The inventory process for those of us who have been brutalized by this family disease is so very important.  Done well it should take a long time and then that is where patience and acceptance comes in along with coming to t4hat honest understanding of who I am and what I do next.  When I open another door and find light, laughter and love I feel blessed as you mention.

Thanks for opening doors from your journey here.  I feel graced.   ((((hugs))))