flew in yesterday, after a pretty gruelling journey.
Last week the police pulled me over- for driving too slow- in a public car park.
When I pulled over I got out of the car to eye-ball the officer. Imediately a back-up car pulled over in front of me.
My ideas was to park in the car park- and walk over open ground- with my suit-case to find a room in a motel.
Got to the motel and told they wus booked up.
They had only one room left- and the was the honeymoon suite.
I was strung out and anxious... got the room despite the cost.
...
-- Edited by DavidG on Friday 23rd of November 2018 01:36:59 PM
hotrod said
Nov 23, 2018
Driving too slow amazing!!!!
Great decision about the motel David
-- Edited by hotrod on Friday 23rd of November 2018 09:36:37 AM
Iamhere said
Nov 23, 2018
(((David))) - glad you made it back home safe and sound.....I too am surprised that you got pulled over for going too slow! I suppose it's way better than going too fast. Take good care of you!
serenity47 said
Nov 23, 2018
That made me lol. I have also had the experience of getting pulled over for driving to slow when I was visiting my daughter one time. The irony of it all was she had warned me and I laughed as she was famous for getting speeding tickets. Well no sooner out of her mouth then wham the police pulled me over, He said, only two people drive this slow,... tourists and drug dealers, which one are you. LOL.....Oh the irony. He kindly let me go with a warning
Glad you made it home safely and hey, we all deserve the honeymoon suite once in awhile!!
Freetime said
Nov 23, 2018
David , I too am glad you had safe travels back home. Take care of yourself after the journey. And thank you for sharing the not-driving-fast-enough story. I love when there is a funny story to tell amid difficult times.
DavidG said
Nov 23, 2018
Thanks y'all... I am okay about driving a tractor over a stony paddock...
the freeways and byways of the USA describe- as a left hand driver from NZ- as playing russian roulette with five in the chamber.
[Well, maybe that is my drama queen showing?]
This week I organised a cremation, cleared out our brother's home, and set up a power of attorney- over there in the USA...
for me to be able to do that was a miracle- the lost broken person that ah is... ...
now I am working with my sister and two brothers- to tidy things up and move on. We are not a happy family- as a family... I would describe my relationship with my sister as toxic...
being a part of the Alanon family is a great relief. To be known and honoured...
thanks y'all... ...
PosiesandPuppies said
Nov 23, 2018
Glad you are home safe, David!
I have a police officer friend, and he has always said to me that a slow driving car is a "red flag" for them... b/c they are usually UTI - Under The Influence! And most US officers don't like it when the driver steps out of the car... it "usually" means a confrontation. It is just the way it is here in the US.
I am hoping that the dealings with your siblings do not tax your spiritual/physical health...it is still a time of grief. Wishing you Peace!
JerryF said
Nov 23, 2018
Wow David I related to the anxiety consternation in this post...going thru some of it myself and then not alone. I guess I haven't be able t scare my HP off for now. I need peace of mind and serenity and hope. Glad you got back home safe and sound and still somewhat in sync with the family. I am praying for that for myself so will add the "and David also" to my prayers. ((((hugs))))
DavidG said
Nov 26, 2018
Thanks y'all,
I am holding onto this thread, and not starting another one.
I used to call myself a drama queen- and with no centre, or base, I just went on, and on, and on.... Maybe not now... on life's journey. I seemed to be the family hero who was cut down at the knees, or the thighs...
...coming to the Miracles in Progress groups- I felt that I was at the end of my rope. But then my feet were two inches off of the ground. [I am thinking here of the old black and white cartoons I used to watch!]
Then I realised that the rope was around my neck!
The upshot of this idea was that my breathing was not right. I was shallow breathing. I was in a constant panic mode. So regular breathing became a priority. And it became an essential part of my Step 11 practise.
My actual thinking improved. Problem solving; getting a list of priorities. Also being able to communicate with others. to listen; to speak; to have reasonable timing. For me im-time-acy was about empathy and good timing.
As I write, this journal piece- for anyone who cares to read- I realise that our higher power does guide; our higher power does lead... and often people around us can carry the clues to the next part of the journey...
peer support. Many groups wil have a handful of long timers... but here we have a whole caucus of old timers. Accumulated wisdom.
Thanks...
Iamhere said
Nov 26, 2018
(((David))) - I can so relate to that shallow breathing before recovery.....I too felt I was in a constant state of reactive mode - as the chaos and drama swirled around me. It took this program and working the steps to see that I had different choices and for that, I am so, so grateful.
I hope your grieving is as needed - prayers and positive thoughts continue!
DavidG said
Nov 29, 2018
Hi y'all,
I am still tired... I go to a mindfulness group- and I slept on and off during the meditation...
Our kid brother died an awful death. I was angry in all sorts of directions- including towards him and the family... part of the grieving process.
I bought ashes back here to nz... and my grieving was well underway. I just wanted to bury the remains and move on.
However my sister and brothers thought otherwise. Don't know if they know anything about grieving... ???
there is no family unity. In fact sister is quoted as saying: "there is no family."
I am not holding my breath- but there might be a move towards family and family unity... it couldn't be any worse.
Tonight will be spending time with an old family friend. She was always like a big older sister... ...
JerryF said
Nov 29, 2018
((((Davidi)))) you have the program and program understanding. Letting someone be with you and help0 you come to serenity is part of what we do for ourselves. David is worthy...
Hi y'all...
flew in yesterday, after a pretty gruelling journey.
Last week the police pulled me over- for driving too slow- in a public car park.
When I pulled over I got out of the car to eye-ball the officer. Imediately a back-up car pulled over in front of me.
My ideas was to park in the car park- and walk over open ground- with my suit-case to find a room in a motel.
Got to the motel and told they wus booked up.
They had only one room left- and the was the honeymoon suite.
I was strung out and anxious... got the room despite the cost.
-- Edited by DavidG on Friday 23rd of November 2018 01:36:59 PM
Great decision about the motel David
-- Edited by hotrod on Friday 23rd of November 2018 09:36:37 AM
Glad you made it home safely and hey, we all deserve the honeymoon suite once in awhile!!
Thanks y'all... I am okay about driving a tractor over a stony paddock...
the freeways and byways of the USA describe- as a left hand driver from NZ- as playing russian roulette with five in the chamber.
[Well, maybe that is my drama queen showing?]
This week I organised a cremation, cleared out our brother's home, and set up a power of attorney- over there in the USA...
for me to be able to do that was a miracle- the lost broken person that ah is...
...
now I am working with my sister and two brothers- to tidy things up and move on. We are not a happy family- as a family... I would describe my relationship with my sister as toxic...
being a part of the Alanon family is a great relief. To be known and honoured...
thanks y'all...
...
I have a police officer friend, and he has always said to me that a slow driving car is a "red flag" for them... b/c they are usually UTI - Under The Influence! And most US officers don't like it when the driver steps out of the car... it "usually" means a confrontation. It is just the way it is here in the US.
I am hoping that the dealings with your siblings do not tax your spiritual/physical health...it is still a time of grief. Wishing you Peace!
Wow David I related to the anxiety consternation in this post...going thru some of it myself and then not alone. I guess I haven't be able t scare my HP off for now. I need peace of mind and serenity and hope. Glad you got back home safe and sound and still somewhat in sync with the family. I am praying for that for myself so will add the "and David also" to my prayers. ((((hugs))))
Thanks y'all,
I am holding onto this thread, and not starting another one.
I used to call myself a drama queen- and with no centre, or base, I just went on, and on, and on.... Maybe not now... on life's journey. I seemed to be the family hero who was cut down at the knees, or the thighs...
...coming to the Miracles in Progress groups- I felt that I was at the end of my rope. But then my feet were two inches off of the ground. [I am thinking here of the old black and white cartoons I used to watch!]
Then I realised that the rope was around my neck!
The upshot of this idea was that my breathing was not right. I was shallow breathing. I was in a constant panic mode. So regular breathing became a priority. And it became an essential part of my Step 11 practise.
My actual thinking improved. Problem solving; getting a list of priorities. Also being able to communicate with others. to listen; to speak; to have reasonable timing. For me im-time-acy was about empathy and good timing.
As I write, this journal piece- for anyone who cares to read- I realise that our higher power does guide; our higher power does lead... and often people around us can carry the clues to the next part of the journey...
peer support. Many groups wil have a handful of long timers... but here we have a whole caucus of old timers. Accumulated wisdom.
I hope your grieving is as needed - prayers and positive thoughts continue!
Hi y'all,
I am still tired... I go to a mindfulness group- and I slept on and off during the meditation...
Our kid brother died an awful death. I was angry in all sorts of directions- including towards him and the family... part of the grieving process.
I bought ashes back here to nz... and my grieving was well underway. I just wanted to bury the remains and move on.
However my sister and brothers thought otherwise. Don't know if they know anything about grieving... ???
there is no family unity. In fact sister is quoted as saying: "there is no family."
I am not holding my breath- but there might be a move towards family and family unity... it couldn't be any worse.
Tonight will be spending time with an old family friend. She was always like a big older sister...
...
((((Davidi)))) you have the program and program understanding. Letting someone be with you and help0 you come to serenity is part of what we do for ourselves. David is worthy...