Today's reading is about unacceptable behavior. The writer shares about their experience growing up in an alcoholic home where they experienced unhealthy behaviors particularly criticism from others. They had trouble sorting out acceptable behavior from unacceptable behavior. The reading says, "I thought unacceptable behavior was normal. It wasn't until I came to Alanon that I discovered a better way to live." The writer explains that one of their ongoing difficulties is being able to differentiate between hurtful criticism and constructive comments.
It goes on to offer Alanon program tools and hope for those struggling with this issue. It tells the reader to consider the source. Who is saying the words? Do they have the benefit of recovery? It goes on to remind the reader that if an active alcoholic is speaking, we might consider that it's the alcohol speaking and not our loved one. The reading goes on to suggest using tools like detachment, the slogan How Important is It and making a phone call to our sponsor. It reminds the reader to exercise compassion in such situations because the alcoholic is speaking their words through the fog of an insidious disease. It mentions in such cases to remember to place Alanon principles above personalities. The reading also tells us that an Alanon sponsor can offer loving support to a sponsee to help them separate out what is constructive criticism as opposed to hurtful comments.
Thought for the Day
Among the people in my life, whose words are worth taking to heart? "When cruel words fly from the mouth of another person, drunk or sober, Al-Anon helps remember that I have choices."
Thanks for allowing me to offer this service this morning. (((hugs))) TT
hotrod said
Mar 9, 2018
Good Morning TT, I appreciate this reading as it outlines some of the insanity that we encounter when living with this disease. I also love the suggestions of the tools we can implement as we face these challenges. I know that detachment, the slogans , meetings and the serenity prayer all help me to live life with courage, serenity and a little wisdom. Thanks for your service and have a lovely day
PosiesandPuppies said
Mar 9, 2018
Thank you for offering to take on this service, T2T!
I like this post b/c when you first come to Al-Anon, you are so very desperate for help. These things they talk about seem small...like how can they work against such a powerful disease? But in time you come to find that they DO help... they help YOU!
Have a wonderful Friday!
The1975jen said
Mar 9, 2018
What a wonderful reading. thank you.
Jerry F said
Mar 9, 2018
Just one of the lessons I learned in Al-Anon and here and else where was that i didn't have to or ought not believe the sayings of others face on. I did that early on...my alcoholics and others use to tell me things as they thought and believed them to be and I just reacted as if they were real. I found out that these people were very often as sick as I was and that helped me to pause and wait and say no and then look for more proof and evidence. What a wake up that was which gave me permissions to say, "Let me check on that and I will get back to you". Saving grace for this enabler. Thank you Al-Anon. ((((hugs))))
DavidG said
Mar 9, 2018
Thanks TT...
I have a burning question to ask here- but will leave it until after my share... as a kid i was always too afraid to ask things- I suppose because the usual responses just led to more heart-ache and headache.
I say stuff like- "You can take the kid out of the family, but y'all caint take the family out of the kid." Grow up, in other words. Daily activity in recovery has helped me a long a lot, mainly because it got me involved with other people... especially so because they were people like myself... ...
confused angry does not amply describe the way I felt one I had left home... especially when i realised that was taking me with me.
Looking back can actually feel grateful for my background today. It has given me a depth of feeling, and of soul- that I would have envied if I was someone else.
The question I was going to ask- since Yanksfan used to run the HFT readings mostly- can anyone just log in and run a reading here- or does it have to be run through a central committee. I almost broke out in a sweat asking that- not at all because of today- but essentially because of old stuff! .
Thanks y'all...
Aroha mai,
-D.
hotrod said
Mar 9, 2018
Hi David a few people have agreed to post the daily reading for each day of the week Yanks fan had agreed to a day and then asked to change I switched days with her and now post on Tuesdays. " Looking up' usually posts on Saturdays, IAH posts on Saturday and Yanks Fan posts om Sunday If someone no longer can keep up the postings, and you are interested, I will advise you of the opportunity.
Any of the MIP members who posts a daily reading can use any one of the CAL readers .
wp said
Mar 9, 2018
Thank you for sharing TT :)
Today I found my old copy of Daily Affirmations for Adult Children and yes I took a little time to glue it back together because I've had it and used it so long:)
If anyone has this little book, March 9 reading is about Discovery.....discovering ourselves and our strengths.
See you soon perhaps, wp
Iamhere said
Mar 9, 2018
Thanks TT for your service and the daily... thanks to all for your share and ESH. I readily admit I am exhausted and just am grateful for a safe place to stop by and get some program fuel. Huge (((Hugs))) of gratitude to all.
wp said
Mar 9, 2018
Thanks for stopping by, Iamhere. I just did the same but you have a better description than I do....PROGRAM FUEL. :) Love it.
DavidG said
Mar 10, 2018
hotrod wrote:
Hi David a few people have agreed to post the daily reading for each day of the week Yanks fan had agreed to a day and then asked to change I switched days with her and now post on Tuesdays. " Looking up' usually posts on Saturdays, IAH posts on Saturday and Yanks Fan posts om Sunday If someone no longer can keep up the postings, and you are interested, I will advise you of the opportunity. Any of the MIP members who posts a daily reading can use any one of the CAL readers .
Oh thanks Betty- for the information... just once or twice I posted a reading- randomly- but guessed soon after that there was an underlying system.
Not sure I could keep up a weekly share- if there was a vacancy... ... I sense any one of us- along with newcomers- can pin up a personal share... and these are well supported...
the issue for me, here, was to have the confidence to speak up and ask a topical question... thanks , and thanks for your service... ...
hotrod said
Mar 10, 2018
Glad you found the courage to ask David. You are right, everyone is welcome to share their thoughts about any Alanon related subject.. If a particular reading touches your soul, I do hope you or any other MIP member would free to do post about it.
Iamhere said
Mar 10, 2018
Good for you David that you found the courage! I am always thrilled when anyone posts a topic regarding our recovery....for me, that just affirms or reaffirms 'how it works'...
Today's reading is about unacceptable behavior. The writer shares about their experience growing up in an alcoholic home where they experienced unhealthy behaviors particularly criticism from others. They had trouble sorting out acceptable behavior from unacceptable behavior. The reading says, "I thought unacceptable behavior was normal. It wasn't until I came to Alanon that I discovered a better way to live." The writer explains that one of their ongoing difficulties is being able to differentiate between hurtful criticism and constructive comments.
It goes on to offer Alanon program tools and hope for those struggling with this issue. It tells the reader to consider the source. Who is saying the words? Do they have the benefit of recovery? It goes on to remind the reader that if an active alcoholic is speaking, we might consider that it's the alcohol speaking and not our loved one. The reading goes on to suggest using tools like detachment, the slogan How Important is It and making a phone call to our sponsor. It reminds the reader to exercise compassion in such situations because the alcoholic is speaking their words through the fog of an insidious disease. It mentions in such cases to remember to place Alanon principles above personalities. The reading also tells us that an Alanon sponsor can offer loving support to a sponsee to help them separate out what is constructive criticism as opposed to hurtful comments.
Thought for the Day
Among the people in my life, whose words are worth taking to heart? "When cruel words fly from the mouth of another person, drunk or sober, Al-Anon helps remember that I have choices."
Thanks for allowing me to offer this service this morning. (((hugs))) TT
I like this post b/c when you first come to Al-Anon, you are so very desperate for help. These things they talk about seem small...like how can they work against such a powerful disease? But in time you come to find that they DO help... they help YOU!
Have a wonderful Friday!
Just one of the lessons I learned in Al-Anon and here and else where was that i didn't have to or ought not believe the sayings of others face on. I did that early on...my alcoholics and others use to tell me things as they thought and believed them to be and I just reacted as if they were real. I found out that these people were very often as sick as I was and that helped me to pause and wait and say no and then look for more proof and evidence. What a wake up that was which gave me permissions to say, "Let me check on that and I will get back to you". Saving grace for this enabler. Thank you Al-Anon. ((((hugs))))
I have a burning question to ask here- but will leave it until after my share... as a kid i was always too afraid to ask things- I suppose because the usual responses just led to more heart-ache and headache.
I say stuff like- "You can take the kid out of the family, but y'all caint take the family out of the kid." Grow up, in other words. Daily activity in recovery has helped me a long a lot, mainly because it got me involved with other people... especially so because they were people like myself...
...
confused angry does not amply describe the way I felt one I had left home... especially when i realised that was taking me with me.
Looking back can actually feel grateful for my background today. It has given me a depth of feeling, and of soul- that I would have envied if I was someone else.
The question I was going to ask- since Yanksfan used to run the HFT readings mostly- can anyone just log in and run a reading here- or does it have to be run through a central committee. I almost broke out in a sweat asking that- not at all because of today- but essentially because of old stuff!
.
Thanks y'all...
Aroha mai,
-D.
Any of the MIP members who posts a daily reading can use any one of the CAL readers .
Today I found my old copy of Daily Affirmations for Adult Children and yes I took a little time to glue it back together because I've had it and used it so long:)
If anyone has this little book, March 9 reading is about Discovery.....discovering ourselves and our strengths.
See you soon perhaps, wp
Oh thanks Betty- for the information... just once or twice I posted a reading- randomly- but guessed soon after that there was an underlying system.
Not sure I could keep up a weekly share- if there was a vacancy...
... I sense any one of us- along with newcomers- can pin up a personal share... and these are well supported...
the issue for me, here, was to have the confidence to speak up and ask a topical question... thanks
, and thanks for your service... 
...
Glad you found the courage to ask David. You are right, everyone is welcome to share their thoughts about any Alanon related subject.. If a particular reading touches your soul, I do hope you or any other MIP member would free to do post about it.