My husband was in rehab for a month. Stayed sober for about 3 months. I am in retail and need to work weekends. When I come home from work I can tell that he has been
drinking. I havent said anything to him about it yet. I love him dearly and he is a wonderful person when sober. Need some advice as to how to handle the situation.
Thanks in advance,
Carla
hotrod said
Nov 8, 2017
Hello Carla Welcome Alcoholism is a dreadful chronic, progressive disease over which we are powerless. Alanon is a program established to help families of alcoholics recover from the effects of living n the insanity of the disease. Face to face meetings are held in most communities and I urge you to check the white pages for the hotline number and plan to attend. It is here that I was given constructive tools to live by and found a supportive network of folks who truly understood.
Keep coming back here--- there is hope
Carla61 said
Nov 8, 2017
Thank you for answering me. I'm attempting to find a group. My work hours are making it difficult. Glad I have this forum until I find one that works for me.
On that note, do I approach him or leave it alone?
hotrod said
Nov 8, 2017
You can discus the subject with him asking is there anyway you can help / any food he would like etc knowing that you are powerless over the disease.
Iamhere said
Nov 8, 2017
I send you a welcome also Carla. Glad you found us and glad that you shared. I too would suggest finding local Al-Anon meetings and attending. It was there I found others who truly understood all the ways we are affected by the disease and helped me start my own recovery.
Keep coming back - there is hope and help in recovery!
PosiesandPuppies said
Nov 9, 2017
Welcome, Carla!
This forum is what eventually got me to go to meetings. Both meetings and this forum have helped me save MYSELF. Because once you understand the DISEASE, then you come to understand that there is no saving your qualifier. That is in the hands of them and their Higher Power. Sometimes a long road to understand. Keep coming back!
Carla61 said
Nov 9, 2017
Thank you all! Went to my first meeting today.
Was a little embarrassed because I didn't know not to comment when someone was sharing.
Will definitely go back!
Iamhere said
Nov 9, 2017
(((Carla))) - hugs to you! Great job finding your courage and going. No worries about the guidelines; we all learn as we go. Love to hear that you plan to return. Keep coming back - I love that my Al-Anon tribe is where I can truly be me, open, honest and have no fear of judgement or gossip!
Keep coming back!
Carla61 said
Nov 9, 2017
I have another question. Should I tell my husband that I'm gowing to alanon and what I got from it?
We are very open with one another and I'd like to share my experience with him.
Advice?
hotrod said
Nov 9, 2017
If you are open with him and have had a positive experience with alanon, I would share and explain that it is a program to help you to learn new tools to live by.. If you picked up the literature it would be a great place to start. Good Luck and remember to keep coming back here as well. There is hope .
wifeofalcoholic said
Nov 9, 2017
Yes be honest. Lying goes hand in hand with the disease of alcoholism so it's important that you stay honest in your relationship. Don't walk on eggshells. Take care of your emotions, be supportive but also understand that this is his journey and only he can recover by attending AA meetings or seeing a counselor. Relapse is very common and part of recovery. All the best to you.
Iamhere said
Nov 10, 2017
I also agree with sharing....after all, in recovery, we share our ESH (experience, strength and hope) with each other to heal/deal with the affects of the disease. In my small piece of the world, I am open and honest about what's up as I am living a life that needs no shame, dishonesty, etc. Keep coming back!
Maresie said
Nov 11, 2017
I worked retail too. Thus time of year is very difficult
Finding a meeting is some work.
I think this forum is a great place to start.
I know when I was under a lot of pressire at work it really hurt to come home to chaos and denial. I think it is very hard not to take it personally.
12 step programs get full at this time of year. If you.do manage to hit a meeting then you are likely to find people to relate to. If you don't make it know the meetings are akways there. Thete are meetings here too. The more you are around prpgram language the better
My husband was in rehab for a month. Stayed sober for about 3 months. I am in retail and need to work weekends. When I come home from work I can tell that he has been
drinking. I havent said anything to him about it yet. I love him dearly and he is a wonderful person when sober. Need some advice as to how to handle the situation.
Thanks in advance,
Carla
Keep coming back here--- there is hope
Keep coming back - there is hope and help in recovery!
This forum is what eventually got me to go to meetings. Both meetings and this forum have helped me save MYSELF. Because once you understand the DISEASE, then you come to understand that there is no saving your qualifier. That is in the hands of them and their Higher Power. Sometimes a long road to understand. Keep coming back!
Keep coming back!
If you are open with him and have had a positive experience with alanon, I would share and explain that it is a program to help you to learn new tools to live by.. If you picked up the literature it would be a great place to start. Good Luck and remember to keep coming back here as well. There is hope .
I worked retail too. Thus time of year is very difficult
Finding a meeting is some work.
I think this forum is a great place to start.
I know when I was under a lot of pressire at work it really hurt to come home to chaos and denial. I think it is very hard not to take it personally.
12 step programs get full at this time of year. If you.do manage to hit a meeting then you are likely to find people to relate to. If you don't make it know the meetings are akways there. Thete are meetings here too. The more you are around prpgram language the better
Maresie