Starting a new thread from the one I started. Requesting for shares.

Do you feel threatened in your own home by A coming out of rehab?

I'm having to try and sell my house (luck if I can .. in time) and run. I fear for my health, sanity, and everything else. And many other big fears. 

However, I have deep concern for my A (codie never dies?). But this time, I want to do it. The A is 100% dependent on me and is likely to attempt the big S. Until then, we are trying to "keep" the A in Rehab.

I'm suffering massively every day. Any share will help.

((Navvik))) you re not alone I too feared the insanity starting again but alanon meetings,calling on my sponsor helped to get me through. It is one day, some times one moment at a time that we live  and we also need to accept the fact that alcoholism is a chronic disease over which we are powerless.

Social Services in USA always checks to see if the person being discharged has a place to live- if not they arrange shelter.   I would check with the facility as to their discharge plan , express my fears and then make a decision.

Please do keep coming back.

Navvik that part of Hotrod's suggestion about face to face Al-Anon meetings or any/every Al-Anon meetings was gold for me when I first got into the program.  That is where I sat in the wisdom of recovery with all of the membership that had been where I was and learned another way of seeing and believing and living.  Check the white pages of your local telephone book for the Al-Anon hot line and call to find out when and where we meet in your area and also check the face page of this site for online meetings you can attend daily.   Keep coming back (((((hugs))))) 

We have AA meetings, but not really Al Anon here. Face to face meetings dont work for Al anon mostly :(

Hi Navvik, 

Sorry that your situation has become overwhelming and feels unmanageable. If only AA is available where you are, you may be able to attend if there are meeting that are OPEN to everyone. Listening and learning about the experiences of alcoholics in open AA meetings can help when considering life altering decisions that concern ourselves and the alcoholics in our lives. If it's a resource that is available to you where you are, it may help you to find answers that work for you and your life. ((hugs))) TT

I heard some pretty successful stories about rehab when I went to AA meetings.

I also know of many many people who do the rehab rotation almost routinely.

Personally I found their being in rehab almost as difficult as the being out of rehab.

I know it is hard to be in the when is the other shoe going to drop issue.

I have a friend who is an alcoholic.  She gets into some very difficult positions pretty routinely.

I have worried about her off and on for a long time.  I had to take myself out of the picture with her because I could no longer rush in and make it all right.

The concern did not go away as long as she is drinking and doing whatever else she is guaranteed to end up in trouble.  There is always lots of trouble.

What changed is that I no longer feel responsible for helping her.  Giving up did not mean I stopped liking her or being concerned for her.  I just had to 

resign my role in cleaning the mess up.

Generally I only resign cleaning the mess up for someone when the mess has completely suffused into my life and cause me tremendous problems

maresie

Thanks for the shares. 

I can definitely say that I have come very FAR using MIP, Al Anon wisdom. The situation is not bad at the moment. Its the anxiety that ties me down. I'm considering selling the house and moving away. So, when he does come out some day, he will have to find a new life. This very thought makes me very very sad, but there are bigger things that I feel I will need to face. Hoping HP shows me a way and handles whatever is coming.

Yesterday, I spoke with the owner of the center and he said that the A is doing OK (they always say that ). He told me not to think of letting the A out before 6 months. These people seem to be good even though there is an obvious money motive.