Hi. Today I have alot to be grateful for. My life is about to change for the better. I am loosing 200 pounds of dead weight and heart ache. My AH left his phone in the truck and asked me to pick it up and bring it to him tomorrow. So of course I looked in his phone. I know I shouldn't have but I have not trusted him since his last affair 6 months ago when I moved to Texas . He joined me for the last 4 months, this past month we have been living apart. Well of course he has a new girl friend plus other girls he dates, explicit videos. He is really sick and addicted multiple things. He can't give me the time of day or any courtesy because he is emotionally unable and only looking to satisfy himself. This is the end of our relationship. I am a good person, kind loving and caring. I have wonderful children and grandkids to spend time with who love me. I don't need to waste another second on AH. I am sad but relieved at the same time. I know his end is either jail or death because he is spiralling down out of control. I am not going to be there anymore. He is not my responsibility. I am going to wish him luck and the best, but keep on stepping. Tomorrow is a NEW DAY.
mamalioness said
Sep 21, 2017
(((((((((((((((((((((Flyfree))))))))))))))))))) and you will be "flying free" as well..so so sorry that he was unfaithful...You have a forgiving heart...I would have been gone the FIRST offense of cheating...You were nicer..You gave him a 2nd chance and hes blown it....maybe your HP meant for him to leave his cell behind for you to find this confirmation that this is what you are looking at if you stay...other women...STDs to worry about.....I am truly sorry for what has happened, and I read your posts and I see kindness and gentleness...even in the wake of this, you still intend to wish him luck and the best......and YES!!! KEEP ON STEPPING.......Tomorrow IS a NEW DAY...no doubt about it......hang with us and the folks in your life who love you and treat you as you deserve and let the chaffe blow in the wind.......and yes, if he does not get help, he will get worse.....I'm sorry for his children to be experiencing this, but kids are resilient and they got a great mom..............hugs of support...
-- Edited by mamalioness on Thursday 21st of September 2017 12:19:41 PM
milkwood said
Sep 21, 2017
(((((((Flyfree))))))),
Uck, Ick, gRuur!!!!
I am so sorry because on one level that must be painful for you but you don't deserve such a lack of respect. On the other hand, I love that you have such a clear vision of where your attention will be in the future, surrounded by loving people and facing a new day and a new path. Your kind heart will be healing in much healthier surroundings and I suspect that your journey will be truly inspirational. Not one second more - I like that. (((((hugs a plenty)))))
a4l said
Sep 21, 2017
Hugs flyfree. Been there, it hurt and it sucked. Went there again, it still hurt and still sucked. Wishing you lots of comfort and warmth. The chatroom, literature, walks, going out for coffee, meetings, all have been my help during hard times. Keep coming back .
hotrod said
Sep 21, 2017
((Flyfree)) You are not alone. Sending warm positive thoughts and prayers to accompany you on your recovery journey.
Iamhere said
Sep 21, 2017
(((Flyfree))) - I too am sending positive thoughts and prayers your way.....be gentle with you and lean into your recovery! Know that we are here for you!
PosiesandPuppies said
Sep 21, 2017
Good for you!! Good that you are choosing to "FlyFree" and respect yourself and give you the life you deserve! Forget your qualifier!
Lean-in to your program, be gentle with you each day (b/c each day will bring different challenges) and keep moving forward... YOU so deserve it!
Namaste
mamalioness said
Sep 21, 2017
Flyfree, you got us here.....cheering you on to a better life......the courage and grace you have shown in this situation sets a great example of the power of positive energy.........
Maresie said
Sep 23, 2017
I think they actually want to get caught.
Then they can be in this whole reaction paradigm.
Around alcoholics I have to be calm and collected.
One way I deal with those unexpected #demands# is to be really busy.
I would live to come participate in your drama but I am too busy.
Everything in me wants to confront them but I know where that gets me. I act preoccupied and not quite there. Any good alcoholic is seeking someone who is overinvolved, ready to give at no notice but most of all highly likely to be obsessed with them
I never did date casually. When I met someone who wanted to do that it felt very very strange. I went to #love# really quickly, total commitment soon followed.
These days the only total commitment I have is to myself.
I.could never do that before. I felt empty unless I was going out of my way to please someone. That was the only kind of attention I.could tolerate a few crumbs here and there
(((((((((((((((((((((Flyfree))))))))))))))))))) and you will be "flying free" as well..so so sorry that he was unfaithful...You have a forgiving heart...I would have been gone the FIRST offense of cheating...You were nicer..You gave him a 2nd chance and hes blown it....maybe your HP meant for him to leave his cell behind for you to find this confirmation that this is what you are looking at if you stay...other women...STDs to worry about.....I am truly sorry for what has happened, and I read your posts and I see kindness and gentleness...even in the wake of this, you still intend to wish him luck and the best......and YES!!! KEEP ON STEPPING.......Tomorrow IS a NEW DAY...no doubt about it......hang with us and the folks in your life who love you and treat you as you deserve and let the chaffe blow in the wind.......and yes, if he does not get help, he will get worse.....I'm sorry for his children to be experiencing this, but kids are resilient and they got a great mom..............hugs of support...
-- Edited by mamalioness on Thursday 21st of September 2017 12:19:41 PM
Uck, Ick, gRuur!!!!
I am so sorry because on one level that must be painful for you but you don't deserve such a lack of respect. On the other hand, I love that you have such a clear vision of where your attention will be in the future, surrounded by loving people and facing a new day and a new path. Your kind heart will be healing in much healthier surroundings and I suspect that your journey will be truly inspirational. Not one second more - I like that. (((((hugs a plenty)))))
Lean-in to your program, be gentle with you each day (b/c each day will bring different challenges) and keep moving forward... YOU so deserve it!
Namaste
I think they actually want to get caught.
Then they can be in this whole reaction paradigm.
Around alcoholics I have to be calm and collected.
One way I deal with those unexpected #demands# is to be really busy.
I would live to come participate in your drama but I am too busy.
Everything in me wants to confront them but I know where that gets me. I act preoccupied and not quite there. Any good alcoholic is seeking someone who is overinvolved, ready to give at no notice but most of all highly likely to be obsessed with them
I never did date casually. When I met someone who wanted to do that it felt very very strange. I went to #love# really quickly, total commitment soon followed.
These days the only total commitment I have is to myself.
I.could never do that before. I felt empty unless I was going out of my way to please someone. That was the only kind of attention I.could tolerate a few crumbs here and there
Maresie