Grateful for spending the morning with my ABF who was of sound mind and great spirits. But what is around the corner is not lost on me. It is achingly raw and blaring at me. I despise seeing around the next bend with negativity but hoping and being disappointed is much worse. Should i hope?
hotrod said
Sep 8, 2017
((Jearnee Live one day at a time, appreciate the joy and happiness without going into denial of the disease and developing unrealistic expectations
Jerry F said
Sep 8, 2017
Thanks Hot Rod...I second that!! ((((Jearnee))))
Mattie said
Sep 8, 2017
I think our hopes often get transformed while we're not looking into banking on better behavior from the A. The way I try to look at it is that I should always allow for the outside possibility that things will get better, while allowing for the fact that the odds are against it. And making sure that I am not letting my own happiness and serenity hinge on that happening. But anything can be around the corner, even the things I don't expect - for instance that my life can be wonderful even if the A does not get out of his present condition.
Iamhere said
Sep 8, 2017
I third that Betty (and Jerry)....I am grateful that my sponsor really, really pushed me to look at each morning as a new beginning. I can still have those moments of mental mayhem - where I want to assume I know the future because of the past or some other insanity swirls around. I am gently reminded by a power greater than I that today is truly all that matters.
So long as i stay centered spiritually and remain responsible for my emotional health, things work reasonably well - One Day at a Time!
WestMan said
Sep 10, 2017
Thanks for posting Jearnee. Lot of good messages in here for me as well.
Bo said
Sep 10, 2017
I have long heard in the rooms...high hopes and low expectations...
This has worked for me. I focus on me and have learned that the expectations...my expectations...have ulterior motives. So, I always, always, always, check my motives. I get objectivity -- because that is the only way to achieve openness and honesty vis a vis expectations and motives. So, the problem with the expectations, and all that goes along with it...is ME. I can hope, but not be vested. I can hope, but not be dependent. I can hope, but not be contingent.
((Jearnee Live one day at a time, appreciate the joy and happiness without going into denial of the disease and developing unrealistic expectations
Thanks Hot Rod...I second that!! ((((Jearnee))))
I think our hopes often get transformed while we're not looking into banking on better behavior from the A. The way I try to look at it is that I should always allow for the outside possibility that things will get better, while allowing for the fact that the odds are against it. And making sure that I am not letting my own happiness and serenity hinge on that happening. But anything can be around the corner, even the things I don't expect - for instance that my life can be wonderful even if the A does not get out of his present condition.
So long as i stay centered spiritually and remain responsible for my emotional health, things work reasonably well - One Day at a Time!
This has worked for me. I focus on me and have learned that the expectations...my expectations...have ulterior motives. So, I always, always, always, check my motives. I get objectivity -- because that is the only way to achieve openness and honesty vis a vis expectations and motives. So, the problem with the expectations, and all that goes along with it...is ME. I can hope, but not be vested. I can hope, but not be dependent. I can hope, but not be contingent.
Nothing changes if nothing changes.