It's 2am and I slept about two hours. I'm so over this BS right now. Yesterday was a bit of a breaking point. I'm ready to throw in the towel on this marriage, my career and myself. I have so little support. I'm actively being undermined by people at work who are supposed to be helping me on a serious project. Having a difficult time managing my emotions while standing up for my program in a professional manner. My AS was acting really weird yesterday night and I'm pretty sure she was drinking while I was at a meeting. Had gone to see my therapist for the first time in a month and was looking forward to it. Talking about some of this stuff is a relief but it also leaves me feeling raw. After the appointment I had to have a meeting which had the most conflict to date. I came out of it to find my AS had been blowing up my phone because she had a flat tire. So then left work to go help her because she can't figure out to call a tow truck when she's panicking and I guess I must just ooze Co-dependence so ran out there to fix it for her.
-- Edited by hotrod on Friday 12th of May 2017 06:51:39 AM
hotrod said
May 12, 2017
Hi WestMan, please do not make too many hasty decisions regarding your job and life. It is suggested that we do not make any major decisions until we have been in program for at least a year so that we can rebuild our self esteem and are not "reacting" negatively instead of "responding" in a healthy manner .
This too shall pass.
Stan1 said
May 12, 2017
Hello Westman, when I am having a difficult day I like the reminder from ODAT : " When I am greatly troubled by an insoluble problem, I will gladly accept the advice of my fellow members that I concentrate on a Slogan or a Step in finding a solution. I know that constructive action can only be taken after I have lifted my thoughts and emotions out of their confused state." Each day is a new day with a clean page to write a different story. (((Hugs)))
shrnp said
May 12, 2017
I am sorry you are going through this. Taking care of another adult is so frustrating when life itself is stressful. That is great you were able to see your therapist. I agree with the same theme everyone else has said to not make decisions until you are in the right frame of mind.
Iamhere said
May 12, 2017
Sending loving support, thoughts and prayers your way!! There are days and then there are days.....I am always grateful that recovery suggests we stay present and not dwell on the past or the future. There are days where this is all that works for me - making it through this one.
It's 2am and I slept about two hours. I'm so over this BS right now. Yesterday was a bit of a breaking point. I'm ready to throw in the towel on this marriage, my career and myself. I have so little support. I'm actively being undermined by people at work who are supposed to be helping me on a serious project. Having a difficult time managing my emotions while standing up for my program in a professional manner. My AS was acting really weird yesterday night and I'm pretty sure she was drinking while I was at a meeting. Had gone to see my therapist for the first time in a month and was looking forward to it. Talking about some of this stuff is a relief but it also leaves me feeling raw. After the appointment I had to have a meeting which had the most conflict to date. I came out of it to find my AS had been blowing up my phone because she had a flat tire. So then left work to go help her because she can't figure out to call a tow truck when she's panicking and I guess I must just ooze Co-dependence so ran out there to fix it for her.
-- Edited by hotrod on Friday 12th of May 2017 06:51:39 AM
This too shall pass.
(((hugs)))