Wow. This program blows me away. I've recently been led to awareness acceptance and I'm filled with such hope right now. There is a flawed human on the fringes of my life who is the figure of hate resentment and anger by a large group of people and my close friend is one of them. I've mostly stayed out of controversy and listened to her offering my ear and not much else. Well the downfall of this hate figure has happened and I reached out to the person and wished them well. I did this mostly because I've been trying to actually take action this programme tells me to take instead of just talking the talk I've made a decision to be nice. Nice doesn't come easy or naturally to me lol. Anyway my friend was talking about this person and how she's happy along with lots of others that this person is finally getting consequences. I understand that. Justice or perceived justice can be important. I mentioned I had reached out and offered my good will. Well!!! OMG. I'm the devil with big giant horns. I told her I wanted to be kind and that's it. Now she's talking loyalty and how I have none. Betrayal by me of many injured people. You name it. This has all been such a blessing because I see where my loyalty lies it's in alanon it's to my higher power it's the wisdom of my elders. I'm committed and I forgot and now I see. I'm proud of the person my higher power is making me. I went against the mob stood separate it felt wobbly and I did get flashes of shame but only tiny flashes. I did the right thing for me for my journey my commitment to my program I walked the walk and I'm not popular. I'm possibly hate figure number 2 now and wow it feels great. I'm so happy. I'm making progress. I'm living principles above personalities finally or I've finally seen it. I did the right thing for me and I'm losing friendships and connections because of it and guess what? I'm ok with that. It means my higher power is clearing the way for something better. Thanks for reading. X

Great share LC. I am so inspired by your powerful awareness, acceptance and actions. I love how you placed principles above personalities and found that responding to others with courtesy and respect actually felt better even though your friends did not approve.
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Love how alanon is a spiritual program and you just demostrated this so well/
Thanks for sharing the journey

That's such an awesome share. I have always been influenced by the crowd mentality and found it hard to go against the grain so to speak. Even if I saw someone being vilified in ways that weren't appropriate in my eyes.

I think being true to ourselves is one of the greatest gifts we learn in Al Anon. I know I'm still working on it, but I am also grateful to the program for giving me that. HUGS!

Awesome...very strong, thank you for sharing your experience

Absolutely lovely share ((el-cee)) and thank you for your ESH. It's so incredibly miraculous to witness the true change and transformation in us as we allow our selves to accept life as life is. It takes courage to do what you did and it's making you shine very bright from the inside out.

(((El-Cee))) - way to go......it can be so difficult to 'do the next right thing' yet it's so freeing. Your share is powerful, heartfelt and awesome testimony to the power of recovery. Love it!

woohoooo, I so loved reading about the "result" of these steps!!

Ive had the same experience of people falling away, my circle had gotten smaller and smaller not because my heart had closed to anyone but because theirs had closed to me. Like them, I can forget unity and one-ness in a hot minute... falling into the me vs. them (separatist) mentality too, whenever I compare rather than identify.

Thank you for sharing this joy, I am celebrating with you!

Thank you, el-cee, great share!

I'm so grateful that you share your journey with us El-Cee, thank you.

Thanks El-cee, that's great!

Great share El Cee doing the right thing isn't always popular with those that want things to stay the same. You are growing and walking the walk putting principles above personalities.

Thanks from this end too .. Great share ..

Thank you for your support. Its been helpful. I will admit to having some doubts. My friend is definitely not.talking to me and I'm finding it wee bit hard accepting this loss. The rejection thing is tricky but I know that acceptance of what is right now is acceptance of me and my hp will for me. I must let her go because the alternative is people pleasing bending to her will and losing my self respect. She was saying how Hitler got away with everything he did because of people like me. Not as directly as this of course but she brought Hitler into it and how my attitude allows bad people to continue bad things. She sees me as a traitor. I will admit to niggling doubts but I have to remember that she sees the whole situation differently from me and it's OK for me to have a different perspective and her judgement of me is her own problem. I'm trying real hard to let her go without anger. I think that's the right thing to do.x

Hey elcee, not sure which step you are leaning on for support but wanted to throw this out as food for thought... whenever I struggle fitting myself to be of maximum service to God, they told me to back up to the previous step... to lengthen my time in prayer and meditation because with spiritual awareness, I would gain the POWER to carry it out.

and I do love the line in the BB, "when a person offended we said to ourselves, this is a sick man, how can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry, Thy will be done.

I am really grateful for your post and will be rooting for you and HP