MINE .. so these last couple of holidays my BF and I have spent with his family. Awesome doesn't cut it, last weekend we were in the throws of making sugar eggs and having a blast!! I'll have to share some pictures of our art. So we won't be seeing them for Easter which I'm honestly ok with because this is the last holiday for me with my oldest and youngest where I'm not competing with other families .. and I might get more my girl is graduating. So it's just different .. LOL.
Again .. I'm used to having control over all aspects of the holidays .. so I have done some growth .. this one is mine and he can come along and enjoy or not. Yes .. sigh .. on a good day I'm not always compliant .. and these are things I want to do.
He did ask me the nicest thing today and knew I was putting baskets together for the kids .. he's like a little kid .. LOL .. he wanted to know what I was getting and I gave him an honest answer .. I get to spend time with my family and enjoy their fun. Plus I get to cook for them which is something I enjoy a great deal.
BF actually gave me instructions about cooking a ham .. LMAO .. which is amusing to me because I have been cooking for a while now and the kids don't complain about my cooking.
So I am learning how important is it and my way is not either right or wrong it just is .. and while he's totally entitled to his opinion the reality is I will do what I want to do based upon .. it's my cooking experience.
Sigh .. I am still realizing how much more I have to let go of .. and how much of the man role I still adhere to .. grateful for the fact it's progress not perfection.
Hugs S :)
serenity47 said
Apr 16, 2017
Enjoy the time with your kids. Happy Easter. They do grow up so fast and things change. Good progress on just accepting opinions and then proceeding with what is best for you.
Cathyinaz said
Apr 16, 2017
Control....it's so hard to give it up no matter what the subject is. I so hear you!
I saw my xBF during this last week and you would be proud of me not give advice and take control of his life. He has many problems but I just kept my mouth shut or said like your OK and it will get better. Didn't need to hear his problems....I had a enough of my own but it is what it is..
Take care and enjoy family and Easter Dinner..
(( hugs ))
shrnp said
Apr 16, 2017
The holidays are like that, I want to make all the plans myself. I just want everyone to do things that fit in with what I am doing, It never works that way, I have had to learn to adapt and let go.
SerenityRUS said
Apr 17, 2017
It was over all a nice week, I really learned a few things about myself and issues of control one of them get out of my kitchen .. LOL!! It's where the knives are kept. :/ Some of it I wasn't having. It was funny because I relented in a good way and decided I was hogging the kitchen so he peeled potatoes .. about 10 lbs worth .. LOL .. he went over just a little needless to say that is way more mashed potatoes than I needed in that moment. Left overs will be yummy. :) We are having an interesting power struggle that his seems to be he wants me to control and I keep shoving it back going no .. doesn't look good on me. THAT'S where I am struggling that he just doesn't think like I do.
My daughter is awesome .. she cleaned the kitchen .. turns out I have done her dirty because I opened the fridge to almost loose 5 of my good dishes .. so her and I will have to discuss how to "clean up" the kitchen with leftovers. It's all stuff I have neglected to teach.
I'm not sure we belong in the kitchen together there seems to be a biological need to be where ever I am standing in the moment .. I haven't figured that out .. I'm used to it with kids and pets .. just not with sig others. LOL. After I managed to knock something out of the fridge that was on a plate he left the room which I was ok with because it was just way over stimulating for me. That's the other thing I have discovered I am sensory in a big way and to much is to much.
This for me is a learning experience and one I will cherish I am trying to see where things fit. I just don't need to know today.
MINE .. so these last couple of holidays my BF and I have spent with his family. Awesome doesn't cut it, last weekend we were in the throws of making sugar eggs and having a blast!! I'll have to share some pictures of our art. So we won't be seeing them for Easter which I'm honestly ok with because this is the last holiday for me with my oldest and youngest where I'm not competing with other families .. and I might get more my girl is graduating. So it's just different .. LOL.
Again .. I'm used to having control over all aspects of the holidays .. so I have done some growth .. this one is mine and he can come along and enjoy or not. Yes .. sigh .. on a good day I'm not always compliant .. and these are things I want to do.
He did ask me the nicest thing today and knew I was putting baskets together for the kids .. he's like a little kid .. LOL .. he wanted to know what I was getting and I gave him an honest answer .. I get to spend time with my family and enjoy their fun. Plus I get to cook for them which is something I enjoy a great deal.
BF actually gave me instructions about cooking a ham .. LMAO .. which is amusing to me because I have been cooking for a while now and the kids don't complain about my cooking.
So I am learning how important is it and my way is not either right or wrong it just is .. and while he's totally entitled to his opinion the reality is I will do what I want to do based upon .. it's my cooking experience.
Sigh .. I am still realizing how much more I have to let go of .. and how much of the man role I still adhere to .. grateful for the fact it's progress not perfection.
Hugs S :)
I saw my xBF during this last week and you would be proud of me not give advice and take control of his life. He has many problems but I just kept my mouth shut or said like your OK and it will get better. Didn't need to hear his problems....I had a enough of my own but it is what it is..
Take care and enjoy family and Easter Dinner..
(( hugs ))
My daughter is awesome .. she cleaned the kitchen .. turns out I have done her dirty because I opened the fridge to almost loose 5 of my good dishes .. so her and I will have to discuss how to "clean up" the kitchen with leftovers. It's all stuff I have neglected to teach.
I'm not sure we belong in the kitchen together there seems to be a biological need to be where ever I am standing in the moment .. I haven't figured that out .. I'm used to it with kids and pets .. just not with sig others. LOL. After I managed to knock something out of the fridge that was on a plate he left the room which I was ok with because it was just way over stimulating for me. That's the other thing I have discovered I am sensory in a big way and to much is to much.
This for me is a learning experience and one I will cherish I am trying to see where things fit. I just don't need to know today.
Hugs S :)