Today's reading considers the 'three A's'- Awareness, Acceptance, and Action, and how tempting and easy it can be to jump from awareness to action without ever considering acceptance. When a problem comes up and we become aware of it, those of us that are "fixers" tend to rush to fix it as fast as we can before it can cause any discomfort.

This, the reading points out, is not necessarily positive because without accepting the negative event (be it a problem, a defect or a memory), we can't really deal with it effectively and the solution often doesn't work or we are not comfortable with it. It suggests that taking time to accept situations that we 'predict" will be a problem before taking action leads to greater self-acceptance and gives us a much better platform from which to create change. 

"Someone suggested I stop concentrating on changing myself, and think first about accepting myself. That gave me the boost I needed" (Al-ateen- One Day At A Time)

***

It's certainly my tendency to try to take action as soon as I think "something is wrong" before anyone notices. Even problems that have nothing to do with me...for example, I know that person X is drunk and they are going to speak to person B and I am worried they will say something insensitive to person B so i race to try to prevent them from speaking to each other (this scenario happens so often that i can actually feel the anxiety building just writing about it).

I think because i have an underlying belief that if anyone becomes uncomfortable or upset, it must be my fault. So accepting things when they go wrong and allowing myself time to sit with it (and even...gasp...to allow others to become aware of it too) is REALLY HARD!!! It's not an art I can claim to have mastered, so i'll take todays reading as an opportunity to be mindful and try to incorporate this into my daily life I look forward to some input on this one!!!

Good morning Ms. M , powerful share and great reminder for  today.  I can remember when I first heard the three A's; awareness, acceptance and action discussed at meetings, I was confused because I always thought that being a" fast thinker" and able to make decisions  and act was an asset of mine.   Al-Anon. reminded me that  my fast  thinking was merely" reactions" and not healthy"responses".  That reacting to  a situation without properly thinking about it and taking action without acceptance was extremely destructive.

The more I thought about it, and shared about  this at meetings, I finally came to understand that, for me: Acceptance meant that I no longer going to fight the situation and try to  change it. I no longer would try to manipulate tol get my way.

That was indeed powerful.  Acceptance to me meant "surrender "and once I surrendered and stopped  trying to change someone or something, I could then take appropriate healthy and actions.

Being powerless over people places and things and then processing my next action by asking HP for guidance has been my mainstay for years. Thanks to Al-Anon I have adopted this powerful tool as part of my everyday thinking.

 Thanks for your service. I do hope you have  a great day.

Thank you for your service MissM. Today's reading is one of my "go to" readings when I need to be reminded why I'm feeling uncomfortable. I even have it book marked with the word "acceptance" on it, because the 3 A's are that important in my recovery. For me when I'm not feeling myself I know there is something I'm denying and it is usually the present. The process I use is to recognize and feel the discomfort in me (awareness), become consciously present (acceptance) and wait for HP's will (action). I love everyone's shares on this topic, thank you and have a lovely weekend.

Thanks for your service and share MissM.  I see so many motivations for jumping from awareness to action. Fear would be the greatest of them for me. You would think that fear would lead to inaction rather than action but not for me. Before Alanon recovery, I did a lot of projecting concerning negative outcomes concerning alcoholics in my life. Because I'd become so accustomed to living with insanity and chaos, I felt the need to make a quick choice or quick "fix" hoping to avoid further fallout and pain.

This old unhealthy behavior continued until I found some healthy Alanon tools for facing life on life's terms. I came into Alanon fully knowing that the active alcoholic in my life couldn't be trusted. But my greatest awareness was that I couldn't trust myself, couldn't trust my own thinking. It was faulty from having made decisions based on kneejerk reactions to the disease of alcoholism rather than thoughtful consideration and tools of Alanon before taking actions. Last but not least I didn't invite a higher power in my decision making because I'd felt betrayed by my higher power. I thought a loving hp would have given me a sober spouse.

So working the steps which brought a loving higher power into my life, helped and continues to help with fixing my broken thinking. The program helps me to feel, deal and heal one day at a time. Because I've surrendered my life and my will, my hp and I are in constant communication. The program has helped me to trust myself, the process of recovery and that I have a loving hp who will always be there for me. If I slip across the street in someone else's recovery neighborhood I can make a choice to be as gentle and forgiving of myself as my loving hp is. My goal is self acceptance and acceptance of others shortcomings, poor choices and situations for what they are. Life isn't stagnant. Shortcomings, poor choices, situations... all changeable. Hp is on the job and will let me know if assistance is needed. This includes those I love. Knowing I'm in good hands, I can sit with uncomfortable feelings and trust that my hp will guide me in the appropriate action if any is required.  TT