Hi Everyone my father died 2 weeks ago at the age of 86 from liver disease. He was an alcoholic of course. We had a very difficult relationship and I have worked on it for many years as I am in my 50s now. I have prayed to forgive him and worked the steps. At the end I tried to call him and he said something very mean , as usual. I was hurt but prayed to release it. I let go of trying to change him years ago and kept my distance. I am crying A LOT and the therapist i am working with states that I am grieving NOT being loved by my father he simply did not know how or want to learn. It is harsh but true. I find difficult relationships the hardest. Does anyone have any AL ALON suggestions of literature for grief. I do NOT want to do this alone and i am reaching out. I use the phone bridge and reaching out to friends. I do not go to in person meeting in my town as people cross talk and do not follow the suggestions. I am grateful for any wisdom and comfort. thank you!
hotrod said
Feb 9, 2017
HI Charlotte Welcome, I am sorry to read of the loss of your Dad and am pleased you are reaching out in attempting to process your loss. I found the following alanon book to be very helpful when I lost my son to this dreadful disease:
Opening Our Hearts Transforming Our Losses
2007
by Alanon Family Groups
We do hold on line meetings here 2xs a day so please do keep coming back
Maresie25 said
Feb 9, 2017
I know a lot about grieving the father you never had.
Iamhere said
Feb 9, 2017
Hey Charlotte - so very sorry for the loss of your father and the grief you are having over his inability to love you. I've got no experience but wanted to send you some (((Hugs))). Good on you for reaching out!!!
Charlotte22 said
Feb 10, 2017
Thank you everyone! I am going through a rollercoaster of emotion of sadness, anxiety anger and emptiness. It is so weird but trying to stay with it. I will write more and call in to more meetings and stay close to friends. thank yoU!!! xx
Hi Everyone my father died 2 weeks ago at the age of 86 from liver disease. He was an alcoholic of course. We had a very difficult relationship and I have worked on it for many years as I am in my 50s now. I have prayed to forgive him and worked the steps. At the end I tried to call him and he said something very mean , as usual. I was hurt but prayed to release it. I let go of trying to change him years ago and kept my distance. I am crying A LOT and the therapist i am working with states that I am grieving NOT being loved by my father he simply did not know how or want to learn. It is harsh but true. I find difficult relationships the hardest. Does anyone have any AL ALON suggestions of literature for grief. I do NOT want to do this alone and i am reaching out. I use the phone bridge and reaching out to friends. I do not go to in person meeting in my town as people cross talk and do not follow the suggestions. I am grateful for any wisdom and comfort. thank you!
HI Charlotte Welcome, I am sorry to read of the loss of your Dad and am pleased you are reaching out in attempting to process your loss. I found the following alanon book to be very helpful when I lost my son to this dreadful disease:
Opening Our Hearts Transforming Our Losses
2007