stressed over wanting not to make the same mistakes i have in my life. Also trying to fiquire out if the path im on, is where im supposed to be. I guess only the HP knows for sue these things. Still i dont want to be left holding the bag again, as far as my relationship goes. Im treading a line between helping and standing back as far as his accumulation poblem goes. I think ive had too much theapy in my life, tying to fiquie out why he does what he does on top of wanting to know what my next moves in my life should be. I know i sound vague but only for the protection of my pals hee. I dont need u to fall asleep on me or have your eyes glaze over LOL.
sometimes my progress and other's progress moves much too slowly for me. That makes me a little nutso and probaly lead to my guy, holding my both hands and saying to me that he cant hea anymore negative comments on his messy house and car. He is trying to work on it and wants to .
thanks for reading
alyce
Maresie25 said
Jan 12, 2017
I know detaching is one of my.constant practices
Detaching is a real art a much under rated skill.
I try to stay really busy in my own life. My own projects my own goals. Relationships can swallow me up.
I work around a man who not picks everything. Believe me he had plenty of problems. It is really draining
I am sure he does it because he feels so out of control.
But it doesn't matter for me
At one time when I.was in a long term relationship with an alcoholic/addict I wanted to analyse the why
He had an extremely dysfunctional relationship with his mother. I was really triggered.
Needless to say more than five years later he still has the dysfunctional relationship with.his mother
I am no longer with him so I can look at it in another light
There are certain bottom lines that I live by.
I had no bottom lines. I was triggered and swallowed up by my triggers.
Having a choice is key. I have many many challenges today. A friend of mine, very dear to me, committed suicide over the holiday
The difference today is I.dont get swallowed up.
Boundaries are everything to me Watching my triggers is so so key. But most of all every day working on self care is so critical.
Around an active A my self care can go completely kaput
That is one more reason for those boundaries
Maresie45
Iamhere said
Jan 12, 2017
(((Alyce))) - I hope the New Year finds you well! I have moments where I feel I am outside my body watching my life unfold. I also have moments of uncertainly, confusion and wonder. Lastly, I have moments of peace, joy and true serenity. The ego of me wants the last one all the time. The brain in me knows that the other two are about learning, growing, changing....
I used to get upset at me thinking I was not working my program well when/if I had moments of confusion or uncertainty. I was told over and over again that nothing happens my mistake in my life - my HP has the master plan and there are no coincidences or accidents. I over-analyzed everything looking always for cause/effect. I've worked hard to keep it simple, and trust in God's plan.
It's not always easy and all of the above still happens - moments of wonder and/or moments of uncertainty. The best I know to do is to go back to Step 1. You've shared before about your current 'guy' and his tendencies. I can share that I am a pack rat...my AH is a pitcher. The more he engages in my habits, the more anxious I become. I could sit here and consider why I am like I am or just own it and work on it. My mother was a pitcher - so is she to blame? I've come to accept it doesn't matter why, it matter what I do now that I'm aware.
I have organized 'clutter'.....all that I collect is organized, stored, inventoried, etc. I am respectful enough to not let it impede anyone else's space and I've worked hard to donate, sell, give away a bunch. It is what it is....
Keep the faith and work your program. You've come a long ways and I see HP working in your life! Sending you thoughts and prayers!
stressed over wanting not to make the same mistakes i have in my life. Also trying to fiquire out if the path im on, is where im supposed to be. I guess only the HP knows for sue these things. Still i dont want to be left holding the bag again, as far as my relationship goes. Im treading a line between helping and standing back as far as his accumulation poblem goes. I think ive had too much theapy in my life, tying to fiquie out why he does what he does on top of wanting to know what my next moves in my life should be. I know i sound vague but only for the protection of my pals hee. I dont need u to fall asleep on me or have your eyes glaze over LOL.
sometimes my progress and other's progress moves much too slowly for me. That makes me a little nutso and probaly lead to my guy, holding my both hands and saying to me that he cant hea anymore negative comments on his messy house and car. He is trying to work on it and wants to .
thanks for reading
alyce
Detaching is a real art a much under rated skill.
I try to stay really busy in my own life. My own projects my own goals. Relationships can swallow me up.
I work around a man who not picks everything. Believe me he had plenty of problems. It is really draining
I am sure he does it because he feels so out of control.
But it doesn't matter for me
At one time when I.was in a long term relationship with an alcoholic/addict I wanted to analyse the why
He had an extremely dysfunctional relationship with his mother. I was really triggered.
Needless to say more than five years later he still has the dysfunctional relationship with.his mother
I am no longer with him so I can look at it in another light
There are certain bottom lines that I live by.
I had no bottom lines. I was triggered and swallowed up by my triggers.
Having a choice is key. I have many many challenges today. A friend of mine, very dear to me, committed suicide over the holiday
The difference today is I.dont get swallowed up.
Boundaries are everything to me Watching my triggers is so so key. But most of all every day working on self care is so critical.
Around an active A my self care can go completely kaput
That is one more reason for those boundaries
Maresie45
I used to get upset at me thinking I was not working my program well when/if I had moments of confusion or uncertainty. I was told over and over again that nothing happens my mistake in my life - my HP has the master plan and there are no coincidences or accidents. I over-analyzed everything looking always for cause/effect. I've worked hard to keep it simple, and trust in God's plan.
It's not always easy and all of the above still happens - moments of wonder and/or moments of uncertainty. The best I know to do is to go back to Step 1. You've shared before about your current 'guy' and his tendencies. I can share that I am a pack rat...my AH is a pitcher. The more he engages in my habits, the more anxious I become. I could sit here and consider why I am like I am or just own it and work on it. My mother was a pitcher - so is she to blame? I've come to accept it doesn't matter why, it matter what I do now that I'm aware.
I have organized 'clutter'.....all that I collect is organized, stored, inventoried, etc. I am respectful enough to not let it impede anyone else's space and I've worked hard to donate, sell, give away a bunch. It is what it is....
Keep the faith and work your program. You've come a long ways and I see HP working in your life! Sending you thoughts and prayers!