I used to be active in Alanon years ago but then,I don't know,I guess I thought I didn't need to work the program anymore.A few days ago,though,I had a total meltdown,ranting and raving at my addicted adult son.After he left,I ranted and raved at my husband,and I got so upset and out of control I kicked the wall.
Did it change anything?Did it help anything? No...all it did was make me ashamed of myself and my behavior...and left me with a bruised and swollen foot.
This morning I dug out some of my Alanon books and started reading them,which made me start searching online..and well,here I am.
I need to find that peace and serenity that I once had.
hotrod said
Nov 29, 2016
Welcome Tessa I am so sorry that you hurt our foot and can readily identify with the fear, anger and anxiety that you were experiencing at the time. I too left alanon thinking I had the tools down pat and quickly returned after my son, in his late teens, began to use alcohol and drugs and I reverted to my old destructive behavior.
Glad that you still have your literature so please search out face to face meetings and do keep coming back here . As you know there is hope and help
Iamhere said
Nov 29, 2016
TessaB - I too welcome you to MIP. The disease of alcoholism/addiction is baffling and maddening - my walls in my home wear the scars of it in a variety of places! I readily admit I did not put any of those scars there, but not for lack of effort before recovery.
How great that you kept your literature. How awesome that you became aware of the need for change today. How cool that you found us? I'm certainly thrilled that you're joining our journey!
You know already, but I tend to repeat this as much for me as anyone - there is hope and help in recovery! Keep coming back!
Fooled said
Nov 29, 2016
Heres my truth....I knew I needed help when my RAH got arrested right before Christmas last year. Apparently he had been stopping at a bar on the way home from work and they were clearing land and he asked someone if he could have the firewood. They said yes although they didn't have right to. So, my RAH was arrested for theft. The trooper came to tell me that he also had warrants so they were taking him to jail rather than the police station. He was supposed to be at work at 2 am the next day and knowing the jail he was going to he wasnt going to make that so I picked up his work phone to call his boss and there was nude pics of him that he had been sending to women. He actually had an ongoing text message conversation with one. He was in love with her. When he made bail I went to pick him up, he didn't get out until 8 pm and it was cold and I had been waiting there since 3. When he came out I beat him with the cell phone right in front of the corrections officer. I was charged with assault and battery. I was released on a R & R but it cost me $300 in fines and my dignity. The next day I started looking for help. I eventually landed here.
TessaB said
Nov 29, 2016
Thank you for the welcomes.And thank you Fooled for sharing your story.
-- Edited by TessaB on Tuesday 29th of November 2016 09:01:50 PM
Hello.
I used to be active in Alanon years ago but then,I don't know,I guess I thought I didn't need to work the program anymore.A few days ago,though,I had a total meltdown,ranting and raving at my addicted adult son.After he left,I ranted and raved at my husband,and I got so upset and out of control I kicked the wall.
Did it change anything?Did it help anything? No...all it did was make me ashamed of myself and my behavior...and left me with a bruised and swollen foot.
This morning I dug out some of my Alanon books and started reading them,which made me start searching online..and well,here I am.
I need to find that peace and serenity that I once had.
Glad that you still have your literature so please search out face to face meetings and do keep coming back here . As you know there is hope and help
How great that you kept your literature. How awesome that you became aware of the need for change today. How cool that you found us? I'm certainly thrilled that you're joining our journey!
You know already, but I tend to repeat this as much for me as anyone - there is hope and help in recovery! Keep coming back!
Thank you for the welcomes.And thank you Fooled for sharing your story.
-- Edited by TessaB on Tuesday 29th of November 2016 09:01:50 PM