Being that I am asking my A. to leave the house while he attempts treatment and recovery, in my mind it is as if I have just met him. I am back to March of 1998.
I will not let good memories cloud my judgement. I will try my hardest to not become emotionally nostalgic and forget the issues at hand. I will try to keep a level head on my shoulders while working my Program and allowing him to do what he has to do.
I will embrace each feeling as it comes. Happiness, sadness, grief, anxiety. To feel is to be alive, something I have deprived myself of for so long.
I will no longer emesh and consume myself in him and his sobriety/recovery. I will continue to do what I have been doing....getting out and enjoying life. Becoming the person I want to be, the person I lost years ago.
I will give myself a year to decide if the split will be permanent or temporary. In time we may be able to start at square one again...depending on how our recoveries go. Maybe in time we won't.
I lost my husband many years ago and even though I know he is in there somewhere, I will not sacrifice myself, my health, my peace and serenity to the disease anymore.
My/our whole future is in the hands of our HPs. What will be will be. I am not going to worry about the future-the focus is on today.
kitty said
Nov 15, 2005
"I will not let good memories cloud my judgement. I will try my hardest to not become emotionally nostalgic and forget the issues at hand."
"I will no longer emesh and consume myself in him and his sobriety/recovery. I will continue to do what I have been doing....getting out and enjoying life. Becoming the person I want to be, the person I lost years ago."
WOW!!! These are the very words my mother says nearly ever day! She could have written it herself.
marmare said
Nov 15, 2005
I find that sometimes posting helps me follow through. You sound strong and empowered!
Hugs Mary
nmike said
Nov 16, 2005
I hear you sg. My situation is a little different. My husband left. But I need to make resolutions like you are. I get emesh and lose myself and my goals. I too want to become the person I was meant to be.
In support,
Nancy
leo said
Nov 17, 2005
Hi Sq keep looking after you. You deserve it. Luv Leo x
"I will not let good memories cloud my judgement. I will try my hardest to not become emotionally nostalgic and forget the issues at hand."
"I will no longer emesh and consume myself in him and his sobriety/recovery. I will continue to do what I have been doing....getting out and enjoying life. Becoming the person I want to be, the person I lost years ago."
WOW!!! These are the very words my mother says nearly ever day! She could have written it herself.
I find that sometimes posting helps me follow through. You sound strong and empowered!
Hugs Mary
I hear you sg. My situation is a little different. My husband left. But I need to make resolutions like you are. I get emesh and lose myself and my goals. I too want to become the person I was meant to be.
In support,
Nancy