Thanks to everyone who posted replies to my "Can't Shake this one off" post.  It really helped to hear different perspectives.  I confronted my "a" with how I was feeling.  I simply told him that I could appreciate his fear about losing me because I'm overweight, but I could not tolerate or respect someone who would seek satisfaction outside of our marriage because he is not pleased with my physical body.  He said I misunderstood him and that he was sorry for hurting my feelings.  I let him know that if he wanted to bring up the subject again he really needed to think of a non-offensive way of confronting me on the subject.  Since saying this to him he has not wanted to bring it up again.  Maybe may approach really helped him see how crappy the statement was.  I kept the focus on my feelings and did not badger or belittle him, even though I really wanted to rip his head off with my words, I refrained. 

I celebrated my 33rd birthday over the weekend with my family, it was nice having people around me that know "me", and love "me" just the way I am.  I'm going to a step four meeting tonight, because this conversation with my "a" opened my eyes to some things that I want to explore for myself.  If I don't look at myself than I can't change myself. 

Thanks for being there

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU. iT IS GOOD THAT YOU HAD A NICE BIRTHDAY. IT IS IMPORTANT TO BE AROUND PEOPLE THAT CARE ABOUT YOU.

Shaun,

Wow, good for you on talking to him about the conversation and your feelings. You stood up for yourself.

I am glad you had a happy birthday, wishing you a belated happy bithday here,

Much Love, 

Your post reminds me of one of the things I always say about my A husband-- Everything he doesn't like about me, I should just change... but everything I don't like about him is "Just the way I am" Whats up with that!?! Happy birthday too! Jeanne

33 is my lucky number....

Maybe it will be yours!!

Hang in there!

Aron