On Sunday I went to my parents house because of things going on in the house with my husband. Then I didn't call him until 3:30 pm the following afternoon. Normal I would be calling him when I first got in the car, when I went to bed, when I woke up the next moring. I didn't do any of that. He had called me twice and I didn't answer it. But after the first night being at my parents I was starting to miss him alot. I called alittle more. This moring we I woke up I called him. But I made it for a while with out talking to him with is great. Then the next time I will be able to go alittle longer. I went two days not sleeping together which was hard for me to do.
SweetJill said
Nov 8, 2005
That is great that you are able to leave and have a safe place to go but don't you think he is playing mind games with you? He knows eventually you will call and give in to him and his ways-seems like it's just history repeating itself and he knows you won't leave him for good-just take time away and then go back and the same old stuff will happen again-not meaning to come across as being mean or nothing but he's messing with your head-he knows you will always come back.Why not make him leave for once and let him see how good he really has it at home with you?And then YOU can let him back in when YOU feel he deserves it!
Jill
marmare said
Nov 8, 2005
Your doing great. Hang in there, work hard on you and be gentle with yourself.
Hugs Mary
sunny1 said
Nov 8, 2005
Pending on what you want, I was told it takes 21 days to make or break a habit. I was obsessed with my A. I have done the exact things you have done. Left and stayed with my parents. That is hard to do cause for me, mine never liked my A so the entire time I was staying with them they bad mouthed him. I called all the time too cause I missed him. When I look back now, I missed him but I think I missed the caos. For me it is a control thing, I was out of control on what he was doing. Can I ask you if you plan on staying with your A or are you wanting to become strong enough to move on your own? Whatever you choose, you must set boundaries, let him miss you, let him start calling you, he knows your pattern, when you want to call him, come to the computer, or write in your journal, have a shower, do anything but call him. I will add you to my prayer list. You are doing great and getting stronger everyday.
Sunny1
nycbt said
Nov 8, 2005
Thank you to everyone that has answered my ad. I am not sure what I am going to do. I am hoping that it works out with my husband because I am not ready to leave.
That is great that you are able to leave and have a safe place to go but don't you think he is playing mind games with you? He knows eventually you will call and give in to him and his ways-seems like it's just history repeating itself and he knows you won't leave him for good-just take time away and then go back and the same old stuff will happen again-not meaning to come across as being mean or nothing but he's messing with your head-he knows you will always come back.Why not make him leave for once and let him see how good he really has it at home with you?And then YOU can let him back in when YOU feel he deserves it!
Jill
Your doing great. Hang in there, work hard on you and be gentle with yourself.
Hugs Mary
Pending on what you want, I was told it takes 21 days to make or break a habit. I was obsessed with my A. I have done the exact things you have done. Left and stayed with my parents. That is hard to do cause for me, mine never liked my A so the entire time I was staying with them they bad mouthed him. I called all the time too cause I missed him. When I look back now, I missed him but I think I missed the caos. For me it is a control thing, I was out of control on what he was doing. Can I ask you if you plan on staying with your A or are you wanting to become strong enough to move on your own? Whatever you choose, you must set boundaries, let him miss you, let him start calling you, he knows your pattern, when you want to call him, come to the computer, or write in your journal, have a shower, do anything but call him. I will add you to my prayer list. You are doing great and getting stronger everyday.
Sunny1