Over the past few months I've been actively working on not obsessing on other people, places, things I can not control. Like many of you here, my obsession often focuses on whether so and so is going to call or not call, why haven't they called?, etc. Last night as I was in the midst of this familiar obsessive track, I tried to engage in other stuff, but my mind kept steadily on. Late in the evening, I spent some time journaling and decided that rather than trying NOT to obsess, I would try instead to FOCUS on serenity instead. The questions to help me focus include: What would feel good right now, at this moment? What would be satisfying today? What might serenity feel like or be in this moment? For today, I've created a list to help me experience serenity and enjoy the day: go to the pool for a swim (I LUV water and just being in another element is often so healing and soothing), reading the sections on serenity in Courage to Change and Hope for Today, enjoying breakfast for dinner (one of my favorite treats--pancakes, syrup, sausage the works), attend face-to-face tonight, work on my school work, take a walk in the brilliantly sunny fall air, think more about how I would define serenity for myself, go out to the quiet hill behind my house and sit and enjoy a quiet prayer. As I progress through my day, I will notice my thoughts and gently let them go and return to the activity at hand.
I have to say focusing on what may feel serene, has done wonders. I'm approaching this task gently, not trying to force anything outside of myself to MAKE me feel serene, but instead trying to just drink in the pleasures and wonders of a natural day, and trying to focus my thoughts in the here and now.
Cheers!
BlueCloud
cdb said
Nov 4, 2005
Hello Blue Cloud,
Cheers from me too :) Wow, what an inspiring post! If we all did this, life would be so much healthier and easier for us. I, for one, need to learn to plan ahead and make a list. Your share meant alot. I always wonder how to get motivated? Well you just motivated me :) Thank you and keep up the good work. your friend in recovery, cdb,,,,going to focus on serenity and the moment now too :) Keep on posting and keep on coming back. (PS) you want to work as my personal motivator ? Could use one :)
Satori said
Nov 4, 2005
Your post reminds me of a very specific day in the 'Courage to Change - One Day At a Time In Al-Anon II book, October 10, pg. 284. I know that page because my each month I celebrate the 10th as another month in my recovery. Babble, babble.....anyway...the point is, I went back and reread that day in the book after I read your post...Here it is...
"The road to my hometown wound along a steep hill-side. As a child, I was often afraid that our car would swerve too widely and go over the edge. I used to take hold of the rear door handle and try to prevent this. I was too young to understand that my actions could not influence the path of the car. Yet I often take a similar approach to my adult fears and persist in futile actions.
Al-anon helps me to accept what I cannot change and change what I can. Although I can't control the way alcoholism has affected my life. I can't control another person, and I can't make life unfold according to my plans. I can admit my powerlessness and turn to my HP for help.
When I am the driver, the responsibility for steering clear of the road's edge is mine. It is up to me to take my recovery seriously, to work on my attitudes, to take care of my mind, body and spirit, to make amends when I have done harm - in short, to change the things I can.
Today's Reminder
Sometimes the only way I can determine what to accept and what to change is by trial and error. Mistakes can be opportunities to gain the wisdom to know the difference. If a crisis arises, or any problem baffles me, I hold it up to the light of the Serenity Prayer and extract its sting before it can hurt me."
I LOVE what you are doing for you and the gentle process in recognizing Serenity that you speak of. I also love it when I can read a share like yours and be as inspired by it as I am when I read Al-Anon literature. It's a "true life actions meets the words on paper" moment. It says to me that WE CAN live better, not just read about it and "wonder" if it really works. Thank you!
Live to Love and Love to Live,
Satori
rosie light shines said
Nov 4, 2005
WAY TO GO, bluecloud...........i find the more i am willing to just *go with the flow* i end up with MORE control over what i let go......and less stress........more serenity..........thanx for reminder.........rosie
All,
Over the past few months I've been actively working on not obsessing on other people, places, things I can not control. Like many of you here, my obsession often focuses on whether so and so is going to call or not call, why haven't they called?, etc. Last night as I was in the midst of this familiar obsessive track, I tried to engage in other stuff, but my mind kept steadily on. Late in the evening, I spent some time journaling and decided that rather than trying NOT to obsess, I would try instead to FOCUS on serenity instead. The questions to help me focus include: What would feel good right now, at this moment? What would be satisfying today? What might serenity feel like or be in this moment? For today, I've created a list to help me experience serenity and enjoy the day: go to the pool for a swim (I LUV water and just being in another element is often so healing and soothing), reading the sections on serenity in Courage to Change and Hope for Today, enjoying breakfast for dinner (one of my favorite treats--pancakes, syrup, sausage the works), attend face-to-face tonight, work on my school work, take a walk in the brilliantly sunny fall air, think more about how I would define serenity for myself, go out to the quiet hill behind my house and sit and enjoy a quiet prayer. As I progress through my day, I will notice my thoughts and gently let them go and return to the activity at hand.
I have to say focusing on what may feel serene, has done wonders. I'm approaching this task gently, not trying to force anything outside of myself to MAKE me feel serene, but instead trying to just drink in the pleasures and wonders of a natural day, and trying to focus my thoughts in the here and now.
Cheers!
BlueCloud
Hello Blue Cloud,
Cheers from me too :) Wow, what an inspiring post! If we all did this, life would be so much healthier and easier for us. I, for one, need to learn to plan ahead and make a list. Your share meant alot. I always wonder how to get motivated? Well you just motivated me :) Thank you and keep up the good work. your friend in recovery, cdb,,,,going to focus on serenity and the moment now too :) Keep on posting and keep on coming back. (PS) you want to work as my personal motivator ? Could use one :)
Your post reminds me of a very specific day in the 'Courage to Change - One Day At a Time In Al-Anon II book, October 10, pg. 284. I know that page because my each month I celebrate the 10th as another month in my recovery. Babble, babble.....anyway...the point is, I went back and reread that day in the book after I read your post...Here it is...
"The road to my hometown wound along a steep hill-side. As a child, I was often afraid that our car would swerve too widely and go over the edge. I used to take hold of the rear door handle and try to prevent this. I was too young to understand that my actions could not influence the path of the car. Yet I often take a similar approach to my adult fears and persist in futile actions.
Al-anon helps me to accept what I cannot change and change what I can. Although I can't control the way alcoholism has affected my life. I can't control another person, and I can't make life unfold according to my plans. I can admit my powerlessness and turn to my HP for help.
When I am the driver, the responsibility for steering clear of the road's edge is mine. It is up to me to take my recovery seriously, to work on my attitudes, to take care of my mind, body and spirit, to make amends when I have done harm - in short, to change the things I can.
Today's Reminder
Sometimes the only way I can determine what to accept and what to change is by trial and error. Mistakes can be opportunities to gain the wisdom to know the difference. If a crisis arises, or any problem baffles me, I hold it up to the light of the Serenity Prayer and extract its sting before it can hurt me."
I LOVE what you are doing for you and the gentle process in recognizing Serenity that you speak of. I also love it when I can read a share like yours and be as inspired by it as I am when I read Al-Anon literature. It's a "true life actions meets the words on paper" moment. It says to me that WE CAN live better, not just read about it and "wonder" if it really works. Thank you!
Live to Love and Love to Live,
Satori