This guy didnt have enough sick time when he was out with his kidney. Didnt get paid for 3wks. He needs to go Nov 16 to have his thyroid lumps aspirated. Knowing he may need time off (if they decide to take out the thyroid) he's still taking time off now to stay home. What the frig is wrong with him?
megan said
Nov 4, 2005
What's wrong with him?
He's an alcoholic?....................
Hi Barbara and good morning
When I went to my first face to face meeting a year ago in July, one of the ladies with many years in the program welcomed us newcomers.
She said "living with an active alcoholic is living with insanity"
She said that nothing makes sense.
I learned this is true. I cannot take my rational (somewhat) filter on life and apply it to someone controlled by his addictions.
this freed my mind to let go and Let God about many of his bizarre behaviours.
And gave me the time and focus to work on myself.
Have you planned something good for you and DS for tomorrow?
megan
Jeannie said
Nov 4, 2005
Barbara,
I agree, what's wrong with him is that he is an alcoholic. Most of them don't think of things like getting to work every day, or saving your sick time, or even not get payed for days out. People should just be happy when they come in.
My husband worked for a company for 13 years, and they put up with all of his nonsence. When they finally fired him, he was shocked and angry. According to him, he was a great employee, worked harder than anyone else, and they couldn't survive without him. When I went in to speak with his boss about Cobra for the Health insurance (this was several years ago). His boss apologized to me and brought out a calendar that he used just for my husband. During the course of the last year he worked there he had taken 78 days off. Not including his vacation time. I was shocked! I knew he had called out a lot and I knew the paychecks where always short, but that many days was beyond my comprehension. When I showed him the calendar he was outraged, he said they where all excused days. His Mother has a Dr that will write a note for any day out. The man had 78 days of flue, virus and upper respiratory infections. (None of this was true.) It was all hung over, or just feeling lousy.
Now he really does have health issues, but the new jobs don't care, and he usually only lasts several months.
I have told him often. I take 2 or three days off a year, at the most, and that is including having to worry about if the kids are sick. Instead of seeing this, he gets angry and says, oh yeah, Little Miss Perfect, goes to work every day. It never occurs to him that if you don't work, you don't get paid, tehn you can't pay bills, or have spending money or money for the kids. That is what gets me angry, his paycheck is short and his Mommy gives him spending money so he can drink and enjoy himself, and the kids and I should do without, while I stretch my paycheck to cover the bills his short paycheck didn't.
Love Jeannie
nycbt said
Nov 4, 2005
Hi Barbara
My husband is a mason and he has alot of days off. I hate one he has those days because then that is when he drinking. It is hard not to worry and wonder why they take days off. But as megan said they are the alcholic.
gknee said
Nov 4, 2005
my husband is home today with mystery illness again. The problem with me is that I'm a nurse and always try to diagnose his problems. You all are right. With addicts, none of this makes sense.
I will let his HP take care of him. (but I might open a can of soup if asked nicely!)
When reading Jeannies comment--I thought we were married to the same guy!! Mine is the hardest working man in his company too!!! what a coincidence. He also has NO CLUE as to how often he is out sick--but neither do his bosses because he is in sales and is out and about.
But enough of doing someone elses inventory--I've got my own to-do list to take care of today!
Jeanne
rosie light shines said
Nov 4, 2005
whats wrong????? hes an "A" and hes NOT in recovery......the less time i spend trying to figure out the "A's" in my life, the more time i have to spend on me/ caring for me/ focusin on me/ my recovery........i just throw up my hands and let them do what they gotta do and i make my own life..........this is why i never again marry an "A".....if i am gonna have to be *solo* in so manything , i may as well have the freedom too.......anyone NOT in active recovery is just going to be a challenge to MY recovering.......peace/ rosie
This guy didnt have enough sick time when he was out with his kidney. Didnt get paid for 3wks. He needs to go Nov 16 to have his thyroid lumps aspirated. Knowing he may need time off (if they decide to take out the thyroid) he's still taking time off now to stay home. What the frig is wrong with him?
What's wrong with him?
He's an alcoholic?....................
Hi Barbara and good morning
When I went to my first face to face meeting a year ago in July, one of the ladies with many years in the program welcomed us newcomers.
She said "living with an active alcoholic is living with insanity"
She said that nothing makes sense.
I learned this is true. I cannot take my rational (somewhat) filter on life and apply it to someone controlled by his addictions.
this freed my mind to let go and Let God about many of his bizarre behaviours.
And gave me the time and focus to work on myself.
Have you planned something good for you and DS for tomorrow?
megan
Barbara,
I agree, what's wrong with him is that he is an alcoholic. Most of them don't think of things like getting to work every day, or saving your sick time, or even not get payed for days out. People should just be happy when they come in.
My husband worked for a company for 13 years, and they put up with all of his nonsence. When they finally fired him, he was shocked and angry. According to him, he was a great employee, worked harder than anyone else, and they couldn't survive without him. When I went in to speak with his boss about Cobra for the Health insurance (this was several years ago). His boss apologized to me and brought out a calendar that he used just for my husband. During the course of the last year he worked there he had taken 78 days off. Not including his vacation time. I was shocked! I knew he had called out a lot and I knew the paychecks where always short, but that many days was beyond my comprehension. When I showed him the calendar he was outraged, he said they where all excused days. His Mother has a Dr that will write a note for any day out. The man had 78 days of flue, virus and upper respiratory infections. (None of this was true.) It was all hung over, or just feeling lousy.
Now he really does have health issues, but the new jobs don't care, and he usually only lasts several months.
I have told him often. I take 2 or three days off a year, at the most, and that is including having to worry about if the kids are sick. Instead of seeing this, he gets angry and says, oh yeah, Little Miss Perfect, goes to work every day. It never occurs to him that if you don't work, you don't get paid, tehn you can't pay bills, or have spending money or money for the kids. That is what gets me angry, his paycheck is short and his Mommy gives him spending money so he can drink and enjoy himself, and the kids and I should do without, while I stretch my paycheck to cover the bills his short paycheck didn't.
Love Jeannie
Hi Barbara
My husband is a mason and he has alot of days off. I hate one he has those days because then that is when he drinking. It is hard not to worry and wonder why they take days off. But as megan said they are the alcholic.