OMG you don't know how many times I have wanted to totally give up..... I thought live for what??? But now I know God gave me a purpose to live...
I guess I blamed God for all the bad that has happened during my life... but God only gives us so much that we can handle... And everything happens for a reason....
I am kinda glad that all this negative stuff happened to me becasue if I had had a so called "perfect" life I wouldn't be the person I am today... I probably would not be empathetic, and I would not be so caring....
I know what I want to do when I grow up.... I want to be an advocate for domestic violence and be an advocate for those who were sexually abused... I dont want to get even with everyone that has dammed me, but turn it into something good I guess. I do have a lot of anger in me, but then again I say I can't change the past.. the past is the past... But I can take it one day at a time... and live for today becasue we never know what tommorow will bring
Lauren~
Maria123 said
Nov 3, 2005
WOW Lauren,
That is so cool. What a great way to take something horrible that happened to you and turn it into a gift!!!!
I am so happy to hear of your post. You are amazing!
Keep coming and keep posting.
Maria123
kitty said
Nov 4, 2005
"I am kinda glad that all this negative stuff happened to me becasue if I had had a so called "perfect" life I wouldn't be the person I am today... I probably would not be empathetic, and I would not be so caring...."
"I dont want to get even with everyone that has dammed me, but turn it into something good I guess."
"I do have a lot of anger in me, but then again I say I can't change the past.. the past is the past... But I can take it one day at a time... and live for today becasue we never know what tommorow will bring"
WOW! Yes, all of what u said is truth, dear heart. Now is all we have, forgiving yourself & God & ur "abuser" -- so many Blessings & realisations will be coming to you... transformations in leaps & bounds!
Keep at it, posting, talking, writing... i will be here for you (as undoubtedly many others will be to).
love, -kitty
kerry5 said
Nov 4, 2005
((((((((((Lauren)))))))))))) what growth thats amazing at your age :) I do wish that was my line of thinking at your age im so glad you have it!! I'm so proud of you. Remember also your anger needs to be dealt with still and not stuffed under, what you feel is real. Continue writing and getting it out of your head. I can now say and only in the last year or two i can say i dont regret my past either, if i didnt have the past i did i wouldnt of met you teens and my life surely would be missing something if i hadnt. Im so glad to have you as apart of my recovery and so very grateful for you all. Love you!!!!!!! keep working on you!! YOU GO GIRL !!!
kerry
-- Edited by kerry5 at 09:03, 2005-11-04
gknee said
Nov 4, 2005
Hi Lauren-
I believe it is totally a gift to be able to turn a bad situation into a positive one.
I would not wish the bad things that have gone down in my life on anyone else, but I do believe that they have made me who I am today. (Although, somedays I am not as grateful for the lessons)
take care-
Jeanne
rosie light shines said
Nov 4, 2005
lauren.............."I guess I blamed God for all the bad that has happened during my life... but God only gives us so much that we can handle... And everything happens for a reason....
rosie............i blamed God too, Bcuz he did not rescue me.......i didn't know that we are under the laws of *choice and free will* so God has to *not interfer* in a lot of stuff............i do NOT believe God gave us ANY of what happened to us........i think when we come here, satan guesses what kind of challenges we came here to perfect on, to use to become more spiritually evolved to a higher level, and because he is good guesser, he figures out a lot of times correctly what we are here to *overcome* and he throws what he needs to to make sure we fail..........it is God who gets us through it.......God doesn't need incest to teach us.......there are plenty of ways with which he can give *lessons* without shattering our lives......there are weather disasters, natural loved ones dying.........GOD's lessons are gentle, NOT life shattering...and GOD's lessons are *liveable* NOT the crap that happened to us......what happened to us was the work of the darkness!!!!!! NO God would *visit* incest/abuse on an innocent child.....what kind of trash did Jesus come down on the hardest??in the bible???? whom did he NOT show forgiveness for?????? people who *bring harm to the children* people who *cause a little one to stumble*.......i am not a 100% believer in the bible, but i read it nonetheless.....and NO whee else at NO other time does Jesus come down SOO hard on anyone but the people who *cause a little one to stumble* so why does it have to happen????? cause we are in the "armpit of the universe" and it is earth, where the darkness lives.......there are good spirits and bad ones.....kids like us just "happened to be in harms way" that is all........God didn't have ANYthing to do with the evil that was put upon us.......i don't believe that for a minute....................lauren, please take what works, and leae the rest ok??? this is just my take on what happened to you and me and others like us............rosie
OMG you don't know how many times I have wanted to totally give up..... I thought live for what??? But now I know God gave me a purpose to live...
I guess I blamed God for all the bad that has happened during my life... but God only gives us so much that we can handle... And everything happens for a reason....
I am kinda glad that all this negative stuff happened to me becasue if I had had a so called "perfect" life I wouldn't be the person I am today... I probably would not be empathetic, and I would not be so caring....
I know what I want to do when I grow up.... I want to be an advocate for domestic violence and be an advocate for those who were sexually abused... I dont want to get even with everyone that has dammed me, but turn it into something good I guess. I do have a lot of anger in me, but then again I say I can't change the past.. the past is the past... But I can take it one day at a time... and live for today becasue we never know what tommorow will bring
Lauren~
WOW Lauren,
That is so cool. What a great way to take something horrible that happened to you and turn it into a gift!!!!
I am so happy to hear of your post. You are amazing!
Keep coming and keep posting.
Maria123
"I am kinda glad that all this negative stuff happened to me becasue if I had had a so called "perfect" life I wouldn't be the person I am today... I probably would not be empathetic, and I would not be so caring...."
"I dont want to get even with everyone that has dammed me, but turn it into something good I guess."
"I do have a lot of anger in me, but then again I say I can't change the past.. the past is the past... But I can take it one day at a time... and live for today becasue we never know what tommorow will bring"
WOW! Yes, all of what u said is truth, dear heart. Now is all we have, forgiving yourself & God & ur "abuser" -- so many Blessings & realisations will be coming to you... transformations in leaps & bounds!
Keep at it, posting, talking, writing... i will be here for you (as undoubtedly many others will be to).
love, -kitty
((((((((((Lauren)))))))))))) what growth thats amazing at your age :) I do wish that was my line of thinking at your age im so glad you have it!! I'm so proud of you. Remember also your anger needs to be dealt with still and not stuffed under, what you feel is real. Continue writing and getting it out of your head. I can now say and only in the last year or two i can say i dont regret my past either, if i didnt have the past i did i wouldnt of met you teens and my life surely would be missing something if i hadnt. Im so glad to have you as apart of my recovery and so very grateful for you all. Love you!!!!!!! keep working on you!! YOU GO GIRL
!!!
kerry
-- Edited by kerry5 at 09:03, 2005-11-04
lauren.............."I guess I blamed God for all the bad that has happened during my life... but God only gives us so much that we can handle... And everything happens for a reason....
rosie............i blamed God too, Bcuz he did not rescue me.......i didn't know that we are under the laws of *choice and free will* so God has to *not interfer* in a lot of stuff............i do NOT believe God gave us ANY of what happened to us........i think when we come here, satan guesses what kind of challenges we came here to perfect on, to use to become more spiritually evolved to a higher level, and because he is good guesser, he figures out a lot of times correctly what we are here to *overcome* and he throws what he needs to to make sure we fail..........it is God who gets us through it.......God doesn't need incest to teach us.......there are plenty of ways with which he can give *lessons* without shattering our lives......there are weather disasters, natural loved ones dying.........GOD's lessons are gentle, NOT life shattering...and GOD's lessons are *liveable* NOT the crap that happened to us......what happened to us was the work of the darkness!!!!!! NO God would *visit* incest/abuse on an innocent child.....what kind of trash did Jesus come down on the hardest??in the bible???? whom did he NOT show forgiveness for?????? people who *bring harm to the children* people who *cause a little one to stumble*.......i am not a 100% believer in the bible, but i read it nonetheless.....and NO whee else at NO other time does Jesus come down SOO hard on anyone but the people who *cause a little one to stumble* so why does it have to happen????? cause we are in the "armpit of the universe" and it is earth, where the darkness lives.......there are good spirits and bad ones.....kids like us just "happened to be in harms way" that is all........God didn't have ANYthing to do with the evil that was put upon us.......i don't believe that for a minute....................lauren, please take what works, and leae the rest ok??? this is just my take on what happened to you and me and others like us............rosie