I'm really tired of living in a drunken world. I say drunken world because my b/f is my world and drunk most days. When we met I was just as bad. I've seen him burn himself and cut himself. Why do I still love him? Because when he's sober he's the best thing in the world. Anyway.....not sure how long I can do this. We met 4 years ago. We have alot of baggage. He has 2 kids, 14 and 18. I lost my only child. We have always looked out for each other and taken care of each other. I'm not makin excuses for him but he DOES try to stop his drinking. He can go a couple of weeks then it's RIGHT back to square one. He has been going to a counselor. Monday he see's a doctor. But this brings me back to I'm so tired of it. I know we are all different and have different opinions. I also know I either learn to live with this or get out. I also know that I would love to get to know some of you more so we can talk and maybe I can figure out what it REALLY is I want in life. Ok I'll stop for now. Thank you just for reading this. I hope to have some feedback. Thanks again.

Cathy

Hi Cathy,

This is a good place to come for input and support. You will learn from us and most of all we will learn from you. I am watching CNN right now about a son that OD'd and addictions. They take on a life of their own. We love the A's for the beautiful people they are and hate the addiction for what it does to them and us.

Keep coming back.

In support,

Nancy

 

Thank you Nancy. Yes we do..........we hate the addiction but love the sober man. Thank you again Nancy. :)

Cathy, Hang around, you'll find your way :) No one else should be your world, YOU should be your world. Life gets a little, no..alot simpler when you find your happiness within, rather then it depending on someone else. Alanon and the 12 steps can guide you there. Chrsity

Thanks Christy, I don't even know the 12 steps but do know that I'm on the verge of giving up. Yes giving up. I've learned that love is not always enough. I tell my b/f this and I know he is in his own little world. I also know that he thinks I will never leave. We have two great big dogs whom we both love dearly and I have to think about them. It's not easy to find my own way with my two great big loves.

I think this must be the week we are all questioning our committment to our partners.  I have been married for 20 years and I said to My Mum last night if he's drinking again I don't think I want to be married to someone who lies to me.  The worst part is there is no quick fix and you either live with it or get out.  Sometimes I wish my husband had an affair that way I could say great thanks for your honesty it is over. Probably not as nice as that of course.... In some respects it is like a jail sentence except we are the ones in jail.  Wonder what the remission is for good behaviour?  Luv Leo.

Leo, I know exactly what you mean. B/F is a compulsive lier. An alcoholic is such a good lier and so sneaky. Nights when he's drinking and smoking his pot I just go in the bedroom and watch tv. It's like they are the only one's who exist. You know what I mean?

Cathy

Cathy,

If your boyfriend is your world, shift your focus to other things that deserve your attention and make your world broader. It's that tunnel vision that makes us feel desperate. The real world is a big place and full of promise, whether your alcoholic is still drinking or not. There is a lot of recovery here, so keep coming back.

Emmie

i can totally relate to you. my a is the best sober man in the world as well. he too doesnt touch booze/drugs for two weeks at a time but every two weeks falls back and gets drunk/high again. last night was another fall. tonight i am home alone again and he told me he is moving out. and he turned everything on me like i did something wrong. i truely love him but cant live this way going through all this hurt every two weeks for the rest of my life and in the long run im sure two weeks will turn into everyday. so if this is true and he is leaving me thats his choice, i cant make him stay and i wont. i will just have to deal with what god gives me. but in the meantime i am still very hurt and very lonely.

"I'm really tired of living in a drunken world." These are your words Cathy. My dear you need to think long and hard about leaving that drunken world behind. The purpose of life is happiness...you deserve that. In my house, Cathy, the boundaries are set. My A ignores them, he's gone. I won't have it and he knows it. Good luck to you. Diva