Thank you so much for all of your prayers yesterday. It was a good day. I kept the computer on this website all day. I tried not to worry and did pretty good. When I did begin to worry I would say a prayer and try to let it go.
When I got home--he was home and sober. I was so happy!!! He worked his program went to a meeting and didn't give in. I also tried to work my program and not worry and not tell him what and how to do things. I am proud of both of us.
Now I was wondering--my "a" has been sober for 2 weeks now. He is really working his program and I see a huge difference in him. I have been trying to work my program and I have felt good for 2 weeks now. (Yesterday was the first "real" test in a couple of weeks, so it has been smooth sailing). I feel a peace, yet I'm wondering if it is from me "thinking" I'm doing my program or just feeling good because he has been sober for 2 weeks. Does that make sense?
Yesterday I tried to not worry and realize that I am not in control--I can only control myself, but I knew I would still be upset if I got home and he was drunk.
not that I want my a to use, but how can I be sure I'm doing what I ought to, so that when/if things go bad again I can handle it?
canadianguy said
Oct 21, 2005
Sometimes "detachment with love" can start in baby steps....
If you are planning on taking a walk in the park with your girlfriend tonight at 5pm, then you follow through on those plans - regardless of whether you come home to find your A sober or drunk..... This starts the process, for you, of "your serenity" being solely based on "his sobriety"..... If we are dependant on ANYONE else's behaviors, for our primary basis of our serenity (let alone our sick A's), we are ripe for disappointments.....
One day at a time..... you are doing well...
Tom
marmare said
Oct 21, 2005
Changes are hard, even when they are for the better. Use acceptance and prayer. Wait patiently and things will be fine. They may not be what we expect but there is a huge plan for you.
Hugs Mary
Jeannie said
Oct 21, 2005
Theres an old saying, "If it isn't broke, don't fix it." I would think this goes for questioning it as well.
You are feeling good, and that may be in part to your program, or maybe in part to his continued sobriety. Keep doing what your doing, we never know what tomorrow will bring, hence, "One day at a time,". Regardless of what is causing the happiness now, your continued work on your program will help you to continue feeling good, no matter what he does.
Thank you so much for all of your prayers yesterday. It was a good day. I kept the computer on this website all day. I tried not to worry and did pretty good. When I did begin to worry I would say a prayer and try to let it go.
When I got home--he was home and sober. I was so happy!!! He worked his program went to a meeting and didn't give in. I also tried to work my program and not worry and not tell him what and how to do things. I am proud of both of us.
Now I was wondering--my "a" has been sober for 2 weeks now. He is really working his program and I see a huge difference in him. I have been trying to work my program and I have felt good for 2 weeks now. (Yesterday was the first "real" test in a couple of weeks, so it has been smooth sailing). I feel a peace, yet I'm wondering if it is from me "thinking" I'm doing my program or just feeling good because he has been sober for 2 weeks. Does that make sense?
Yesterday I tried to not worry and realize that I am not in control--I can only control myself, but I knew I would still be upset if I got home and he was drunk.
not that I want my a to use, but how can I be sure I'm doing what I ought to, so that when/if things go bad again I can handle it?
Sometimes "detachment with love" can start in baby steps....
If you are planning on taking a walk in the park with your girlfriend tonight at 5pm, then you follow through on those plans - regardless of whether you come home to find your A sober or drunk..... This starts the process, for you, of "your serenity" being solely based on "his sobriety"..... If we are dependant on ANYONE else's behaviors, for our primary basis of our serenity (let alone our sick A's), we are ripe for disappointments.....
One day at a time..... you are doing well...
Tom
Changes are hard, even when they are for the better. Use acceptance and prayer. Wait patiently and things will be fine. They may not be what we expect but there is a huge plan for you.
Hugs Mary
Theres an old saying, "If it isn't broke, don't fix it." I would think this goes for questioning it as well.
You are feeling good, and that may be in part to your program, or maybe in part to his continued sobriety. Keep doing what your doing, we never know what tomorrow will bring, hence, "One day at a time,". Regardless of what is causing the happiness now, your continued work on your program will help you to continue feeling good, no matter what he does.
Love Jeannie