I think I have finally got it. About a month or so ago I started working on Letting go and Letting God.....as hard as it has been to trust my HP I have worked especially hard on this, as it is easier to trust my HP to take care of things than for me to worry, worry, worry about my A and my life. This weekend was typical; he went out Friday, called to say he was coming home around 9pm only to show up around 2am. Saturday we spent the day and evening together and then Sunday he went golfing and then didn't come home until close to 10pm. I think I got it, this let go thing....I didn't feel abandon, I didn't get angry, I didn't yell, or nag, or cry. I think I have detached with love and am letting my HP do what he needs to do without my interrupting. I am going to examine this more closely and see if this is what happened. It felt good not to have that panicky feeling in my stomach, no fast heartbeat, or dry mouth. I like this and still feel like I am worthy and loveable. This is Great!
Hugs Mary
Dolphin123 said
Sep 19, 2005
((((((((((Mary)))))))))),
Good for you.
Keep up the good work.
Much Love,
kicky said
Sep 19, 2005
You are so on the right track. Now the next step is for him to be wondering where you are as you live you life to the fullest while his is doing the same old same old. I will tell you, he may never be sober, but he'll act differently as your reactions to his behavior change.
Karilynn said
Sep 19, 2005
Marmare,
That was the best advice I got when I first came to this board! It made the first weekend home so much easier for me.
Good for you! It's almost as if a heavy load has been taken off your shoulders isn't it?
Live strong,
Karilynn
dot said
Sep 19, 2005
Congratulations Mary - You've felt your first bit of SERENITY and I agree with you - it's a lot better than the panicky stomach, fast heartbeat and dry mouth.
I'll also guarantee that the next time you lose your serenity it won't take you long to stop what you're doing and Let Go and Let God take care of things.
Good for you.
Love in Recovery - Dot
(((((((((((Mary))))))))))
sg said
Sep 20, 2005
If Mary can do it, so can I! lol
Way to go, Mary!
I "interupt" often! I think I am going to put a BIG note on my fridge today that says...
Do Not Interupt
I think I have finally got it. About a month or so ago I started working on Letting go and Letting God.....as hard as it has been to trust my HP I have worked especially hard on this, as it is easier to trust my HP to take care of things than for me to worry, worry, worry about my A and my life. This weekend was typical; he went out Friday, called to say he was coming home around 9pm only to show up around 2am. Saturday we spent the day and evening together and then Sunday he went golfing and then didn't come home until close to 10pm. I think I got it, this let go thing....I didn't feel abandon, I didn't get angry, I didn't yell, or nag, or cry. I think I have detached with love and am letting my HP do what he needs to do without my interrupting. I am going to examine this more closely and see if this is what happened. It felt good not to have that panicky feeling in my stomach, no fast heartbeat, or dry mouth. I like this and still feel like I am worthy and loveable. This is Great!
Hugs Mary
((((((((((Mary)))))))))),
Keep up the good work.
Much Love,
You are so on the right track. Now the next step is for him to be wondering where you are as you live you life to the fullest while his is doing the same old same old. I will tell you, he may never be sober, but he'll act differently as your reactions to his behavior change.
-- Edited by sg at 08:27, 2005-09-20