hey everyone, talk about a lesson!!  boy did i get one   i did my post on *levels of forgiveness*  and it had my  #1,  #1,  #3,   with #3, being the least forgiveable and of COURSE i mentioned the perp in that one...   my loving and wise sponser saw it and said  "hey rosie,  you gave him over to God, so why in the heck are you still talkin about him???"     well i was like "OMG,  i didn't even THINK about it"   but she was right...even though i am SOO much better at *managing*   *controlling*  the anger, resentment.....  i am still letting it live by talkin about it....its like getting a divorce and i have done those too....  when its over it is OVER!!!!!!  i walked away!!!  i am moving on!!! and to make SURE i do, i need to put a boundary on my talking about those who hurt me....i may have to  *look* at one of them once in a while, but i don' t have to *stare*....   so, i dedided  that i am setting boundaries on my inner child,  on just how MUCH  and for how LONG do i talk about him.....i know in the course of my recovery or if i were to minister to an incest victim, i know the topic may need to come up!!!  but i am setting a limit on just how MUCH times gets devoted to talking about him.......   i figured it out!! its like i have this BIG hole where the cancer has been cut out, and what i need/WANT to do is fill that hole up with GOOD stuff,  like loving me and ANYthing postive and healing....and the ONLY way i am gonna  break thisnow *energy consuming habit* is discipline myself until i get OUT of the habit of yacking about *that*   i want to get well,  and last night when my sponser brought this up i was SO grateful to my HP for this wonderful , wise lady who cared enough about me to say  "hey rosie,  THINK about what you are doing here!!"   well i did and i am SO thankful for this knowledge!!!   yes, i need to set boundaries  on ME as well....   she also told me that the diference between  recovery and staying sick, is about 8"......thats the length between my head and my heart!!!!   thank you DONE

Thanks Rosie, I needed to read this.

I like the 8 inches from my head to my heart, I'm right there..

i am glad you are getting well. I am working hard on healing to..

Rosie,

Thank you for posting that. Your sponser is right and I needed to hear that too. Perfect timing. I sometimes forget completely about that part of letting go. Thank you again.

Agatha