You know, no matter who much I do for myself, take care of myself and understand the situation, I never seem to beable to shake the sadness I feel for how everything in my life is turning out up to this point.  I feel lonely and I feel my hp has let me down.  I have lost confidence in hp caring about my needs getting met and everything I do is a struggle from finances to keeping my car running to managing everyday stuff.

Any suggestions about how I rebuild my hope and my faith in my hp. (boohoo) 

I struggle hugely with belief in hp who cares to do anything for me. I tell myself, "am I so special that he/she/it will care about my special circumstances when I'm sure the people the world over who deal with unimaginable human suffering appeal to God/deity/Oversoul/or whatever you want to call it and still have to live and die with disease, torture, natural disasters, and every other horror that I can't begin to imagine?" To call oneself blessed sounds arrogant to me. So God likes me better than those suffering in the Sudan? Am I that special? I have a hard time buying this simpleminded belief; however, it is the only thing that pulls most of us through. I will keep trying.

Pity pots get awful comfy after awhile , I was told they can also be fur lined so that i get realllly really comfy. hehe    God hasn't forgot you , he gives u tools to have a better life , in our case it's Al-Anon meetings to help us get our lives moving in a positive direction and people who understand exactly how we are feeling and are willing to share thier recovery with us.

There is something we call footwork , we do what we can to reach the goal we have in mind and then give the out come to "God"  Prayers don't always give us what we want but they do give us what we need. Occasionally Gods answer to our request is  NO !!!

T his program works if we do what it says our lives will improve.  keep on going and you will be just fine, This is a simple program but never confuse it with  EASY.   good luck   Louise

(((((Maven))))) we spoke a little yesterday.  I am glad you came back.

I grew up catholic and learned that God watched his only son be crucified so that we could live.  I don't know if that helps you.  I hope so.  I figure as long as I don't have to endure that pain, I am doing ok.

I have some ABC's - I hope they help.  Keep coming "friend" keep coming.

Although things are not perfect
Because of trial or pain
Continue in thanksgiving
Do not begin to blame
Even when the times are hard
Fierce winds are bound to blow
God is forever able
Hold on to what you know
Imagine life without His love
Joy would cease to be
Keep thanking Him for all the things
Love imparts to thee
Move out of "Camp Complaining"
No weapon that is known
On earth can yield the power
Praise can do alone
Quit looking at the future
Redeem the time at hand
Start every day with worship
To "thank" is a command
Until we see Him coming
Victorious in the sky
We'll run the race with gratitude
X alting God most high
Yes, there'll be good times and yes some will be bad, but...
Zion waits in glory...where none are ever sad!

yours in recovery,

Maria123

This is an interesting topic for me.

I feel like I have every reason to sit on my "pitty pot."  But I don't feel sorry for myself at all, I truly enjoy my life---my children, my home, my friends and my work.  I don't think my A ever really enjoyed anything at all.  I think he knew he had a great life but couldn't figure out why he wasn't happy.  I know I have a great life and hopefully it will continue to get better without my A living with us.

Here's where I am utterly lost and sad.  I want to be a happy family with my A.  I want him to be a healthy and happy daddy to our 2 very young children.  I feel so sad when I see a mommy and daddy playing with their children.  I really don't know how to deal with this loss.  It's also a serious financial struggle with no income from the A.   I just really wish things had turned out differently for us as a couple and a family.

I'm grieving.

mom to 2