I don't know if I can take this-how to deal with death
browneyes said
Aug 29, 2005
Hi all
To make a really long story short-
My sister, 34, is in the hospital for a bacterial infection in her blood and fluid around her heart. She has diabetes and did not know it or take care of it for many years. She has been an off and on active alcoholic and drug user since she was 13. She now has kidney failure and goes to dialysis three times a week.
I talked to her last night and she told me the nurse told her she took a turn for the worse, nice freaking thing to say to someone who already thinks they're going to die!!!!! She cannot see out of one eye now and I talked to her this morning and she cannot breathe because of the fluid and she is very agitated, wanting to get out of there.
I of course feel helpless, I am three hours away and am totally conflicted whether to go there or not to see her. She said it would be a waste b/c I could only see her for five minutes anyway. I am trying to be calm but I really lost it last night when I thought she was dying. She is the only one in this world who I can be myself with and know that she will always be there for me and love me NO MATTER WHAT. She is my best friend. She grew up in the same house and has the same memories of our childhood. I cannot lose her..
Meanwhile, I am pissed cuz my drunk father is calling her and crying. She had to tell him that he is not helping her doing that. And my mother is not crying at all. What is up with that? She sounds scared on the phone but while I am bawling, she is acting like I'm crazy and tells me not to worry. OKAY!!!! I know everybody grieves differently but whatever it is not for me to figure out. At least my husband is out of town. It is so much better here without him, sad to say.
Can everybody out there please say a prayer for my sis and for me to have some strength to deal? Thanks guys, I really appreciate you reading this post and for being there.
Love Julie D.
rosie light shines said
Aug 29, 2005
(((((((((((((julie))))))))))))) i am rosie, and please accept my sincerest prayers for you and your sister.....i am SO sorry this is happeing to you.....thank god you are in this program and can draw strength from us, because we DO care......god bless and comfort you and your sis through this horrible illness......i have a beloved sister too, and i would be devestated if anythng were to befall her so i KNOW how you feel....it scares me to even THINK of not having my sister kay with me............hugs, rosie
Dolphin123 said
Aug 29, 2005
((((((((((((((Julie))))))))))))))))),
Yes of course I will pray for you and your family. I am so sorry for what you are going through.
Much Love,
lin0606 said
Aug 29, 2005
So sorry to hear this - I know how I would feel if it were my sister. Extra hard because you don't know how to help. We are all praying for her, and for you.
Give your kids an extra cuddle tonight, take some comfort from them. God bless. Lin
lmt123 said
Aug 29, 2005
Hi ((((((((((Julie))))))))))))),
I am sorry for you and your sister. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
Blessings,
lmt123
megan said
Aug 29, 2005
Hi Julie
You and your sister are in my prayers.
If you can make it the 3 hours to see her, maybe you should.
Hold her hands, tell her you love her. Be calm with her and don't cry in front of her
Just a thought
megan
Kim said
Aug 29, 2005
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your sister.
marmare said
Aug 29, 2005
Consider the prayer said. Hang in there, this is another time in your life where you may need to just live one moment at a time. Know that you have so much support here.
Hugs Mary
TLC2 said
Aug 29, 2005
Lots of ((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))) and TLC to you, your family and your sister. Many prayers heading your way!!! Love TLC
Diva said
Aug 29, 2005
I once again agree with Megan. I find I often do. If you can get to your sis, by all means go to her. She needs family, and I know that the bond between sisters is as stong as it gets. My sister and I are clones!! Hold her hand, tell her you love her. Your visit just might have her taking a turn for the BETTER!!
You both are in my prayers and positive thoughts.
With great caring, Diva
cedarpines said
Aug 30, 2005
Brown Eyes,
I'm so sorry about your sister. I love my sis dearly & don't know how I'd handly it if in your shoes. My thoughts & prayers are with you. Praying for HP to comfort & guide you through this difficult time. Also, take care of yourself :).
Cedarpines
lost216 said
Aug 30, 2005
So often we really miss the times to tell people how really important they are for us- try to take some time and go and see her!
My prayers are with you!
kerry5 said
Aug 31, 2005
My prayers are with your and your family, i know how scary it can be to wait by the phone or not know something. When someone is in the hospital. I just lost my mom she died at 60. I was told this while i was going through it and it helped a little. If God took you to it, He will bring you through it. (((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))
Hi all
To make a really long story short-
My sister, 34, is in the hospital for a bacterial infection in her blood and fluid around her heart. She has diabetes and did not know it or take care of it for many years. She has been an off and on active alcoholic and drug user since she was 13. She now has kidney failure and goes to dialysis three times a week.
I talked to her last night and she told me the nurse told her she took a turn for the worse, nice freaking thing to say to someone who already thinks they're going to die!!!!! She cannot see out of one eye now and I talked to her this morning and she cannot breathe because of the fluid and she is very agitated, wanting to get out of there.
I of course feel helpless, I am three hours away and am totally conflicted whether to go there or not to see her. She said it would be a waste b/c I could only see her for five minutes anyway. I am trying to be calm but I really lost it last night when I thought she was dying. She is the only one in this world who I can be myself with and know that she will always be there for me and love me NO MATTER WHAT. She is my best friend. She grew up in the same house and has the same memories of our childhood. I cannot lose her..
Meanwhile, I am pissed cuz my drunk father is calling her and crying. She had to tell him that he is not helping her doing that. And my mother is not crying at all. What is up with that? She sounds scared on the phone but while I am bawling, she is acting like I'm crazy and tells me not to worry. OKAY!!!! I know everybody grieves differently but whatever it is not for me to figure out. At least my husband is out of town. It is so much better here without him, sad to say.
Can everybody out there please say a prayer for my sis and for me to have some strength to deal? Thanks guys, I really appreciate you reading this post and for being there.
Love Julie D.
((((((((((((((Julie))))))))))))))))),
Yes of course I will pray for you and your family. I am so sorry for what you are going through.
Much Love,
Hi ((((((((((Julie))))))))))))),
I am sorry for you and your sister. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
Blessings,
lmt123
Hi Julie
You and your sister are in my prayers.
If you can make it the 3 hours to see her, maybe you should.
Hold her hands, tell her you love her. Be calm with her and don't cry in front of her
Just a thought
megan
Consider the prayer said. Hang in there, this is another time in your life where you may need to just live one moment at a time. Know that you have so much support here.
Hugs Mary
Brown Eyes,
I'm so sorry about your sister. I love my sis dearly & don't know how I'd handly it if in your shoes. My thoughts & prayers are with you. Praying for HP to comfort & guide you through this difficult time. Also, take care of yourself :).
Cedarpines
So often we really miss the times to tell people how really important they are for us- try to take some time and go and see her!
My prayers are with you!
My prayers are with your and your family, i know how scary it can be to wait by the phone or not know something. When someone is in the hospital. I just lost my mom she died at 60. I was told this while i was going through it and it helped a little. If God took you to it, He will bring you through it. (((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))
kerry