Relationships involving alcohol.  ugh!   The reality is everchanging, evershifting.   For me when dating, I remember my guidelines.  What is the costs of this relationship?   What are the benefits of this relationship?

Are the costs (-) outweighing the benefits?  (+)    What does this person have to offer me?

                                                                       What does this person have LEFT to offer me?

So,  I guess I had a system for weeding them out of my life....then I  realized I kept choosing A's to date.  So, then I decided to never marry one.   Well, the jokes on me....because I married one I didn't think was an alcoholic, but turned out to be one!    (and the universe manages to dangle an alcoholic under my nose, sober or active, when my husband breaks his sobriety))   [Get that magnet off my back!]

Well, the above guidelines are still helpful to me today....just more shades of gray with that marriage certificate on the wall !   With sobriety back in our lives...perhaps the scale will tilt back to more positives than negatives, more benefits than costs!  One dat at a Time.

Wal, "perhaps the scale will tilt back to more positives than negatives, more benefits than costs! One dat at a Time." I hope so too!!! For you and for me. Thanks Wal Your Friend Mark S