I couldnt' figure out today WHY i wanted to call up the alcoholic and tell him what a rotten loser he is because he can't stay sobor. I wanted to berate him, yell at him, get a divorce, and watch him get run over by a steam roller......all after I have developed a solid resolve to love him despite his disease.
Then, through a share at a meeting, I discovered that I was really afraid of the results of an appraisal on the property and a job interview next week, therefore wanting to make him afraid too.
Thankfully I had the insight of the program to lead me to program people where I could work out my feelings without berating my husband and hiring the steam roller....lol
with love in the program....
Aron W (captcodee)
abbyal said
May 5, 2005
Hi Cap . well done. So nice when we can not react. And a sponsor or meetings can give u a new insite into what is really going on. Anger is normal for us the A seem s to breeze thru life while we get left fixing things. Am so grateful that I got to Al-Anon before he sobered up got alot of stuff out of the way before he decided to try sobriety.
Give yourself a pat on the back you did great. Louise
Maria123 said
May 5, 2005
Congrats Capt.
So glad it all worked out. I found when I lashed out, the only one it ultimately hurt long term was me. Because I would obsess about it, justify it, yada yada yada and meanwhile we can't take the hurt words back. So good for you.
Keep coming,
Maria123
Mark S said
May 6, 2005
Aron,
I love the honesty in your post..It is so true as I have been there as well.
Thanks Aron
Mark S
Annalisa said
May 7, 2005
I just had a similiar situation in my life yesterday.....nearly lost it completely, told my A that I wanted to kill him in his sleep (and I meant it, too). I didn't though, thanks to the Serenity Prayer. It was a real turning point for me.
Today with a lot of Alanon literature reading, step work, and prayer I realized the underlying reason for my anger was something inside me at the time that triggered all the anger against him. What a teaching. Back to my Step Four work I go with this new insight.
I couldnt' figure out today WHY i wanted to call up the alcoholic and tell him what a rotten loser he is because he can't stay sobor. I wanted to berate him, yell at him, get a divorce, and watch him get run over by a steam roller......all after I have developed a solid resolve to love him despite his disease.
Then, through a share at a meeting, I discovered that I was really afraid of the results of an appraisal on the property and a job interview next week, therefore wanting to make him afraid too.
Thankfully I had the insight of the program to lead me to program people where I could work out my feelings without berating my husband and hiring the steam roller....lol
with love in the program....
Aron W (captcodee)
Hi Cap . well done. So nice when we can not react. And a sponsor or meetings can give u a new insite into what is really going on. Anger is normal for us the A seem s to breeze thru life while we get left fixing things. Am so grateful that I got to Al-Anon before he sobered up got alot of stuff out of the way before he decided to try sobriety.
Give yourself a pat on the back you did great. Louise
Congrats Capt.
So glad it all worked out. I found when I lashed out, the only one it ultimately hurt long term was me. Because I would obsess about it, justify it, yada yada yada and meanwhile we can't take the hurt words back. So good for you.
Keep coming,
Maria123
I just had a similiar situation in my life yesterday.....nearly lost it completely, told my A that I wanted to kill him in his sleep (and I meant it, too). I didn't though, thanks to the Serenity Prayer. It was a real turning point for me.
Today with a lot of Alanon literature reading, step work, and prayer I realized the underlying reason for my anger was something inside me at the time that triggered all the anger against him. What a teaching. Back to my Step Four work I go with this new insight.
Annalisa