I can't sleep!! I got bad news tonight from my dr.  I got a rare reaction from being on this bad anibiotic and after not feeling well and two trips to the hospital my test results came back positive. 3% chance of getting this and I got it.. It can be fatal and I was told flat out that I could die. My heart is breaking, my kids are only 5 and 3 and their dad is an active alcoholic.  I am trying to be positive but its hard.  My husband says I am over reacting by letting it upset me but just the thought alone is hard.  I am mad because it was all because my dentist perscribed this antibiotic. So DUMB!!!  All I can think about is my kids that are my world!!!!!

I wasn't going to post this but I NEED your prayers that I get through this...

My dr called twice tonight to check on me so I know how worried he is and that makes it even harder. I am greatful that he is a caring friend and always has been.

I was hoping to chat with someone tonight but no one was on so I came here.

I paryed that this sickness would have been the less serious one but my prayers were no answered I hope that my next ones to live will be!!!

Thank you in advance to thoes who send prayer as I am in need.

Your friend JJ

((((((((((((((((((((JJ))))))))))))))))))))))))  My prayers are with you---  Hang in there and try not to think of worst that could happen because just as we imagine the worst could happen in our lives, the BEST could happen too.  I know we tend to give in to the negative thoughts rather than the positive because it is soooo hard not to surrender to those thoughts.  When I find myself so consumed in negative possibilities, I think of events that were miraculous-- particularly in scripture.  However, your belief might be different so rather than thinking of scripture, bring yourself to think of amazing stories of hope and positive results that go on in this world-- things like medical technology and all of the survivers of so many other diseases and infections that live a great number of years, despite their disability.  You said it yourself-- you have a GREAT doctor.  Having that can make an incredible difference in your life and you recovery.  As far as your husband and his comments--  take that for what it is and what you've known it to be to you as his insensitivity and lack of compassion not just for you, but for himself.  It's part of the disease-- remember, NOTHING PERSONAL TOWARDS YOU hon. 

Take Care and many prayers are with you for a full recovery. 

I'm so sorry JJ,

 What a horrible thing to happen!! My prayers and thoughts are with you all the way, Hon. Try to stay strong for your little ones, and give your A a boot in the behind from me!! I find they are so like children that never grow up!! Now is the time when you really need him to be strong for you. I'm praying for a miracle for you!! Love in the program, TLC

JJ,

I am in shock here.....what in the world is happening? Is this a heart problem? Whatever it is,,,you know I am saying big time prayers for you and your family! I do believe in prayers too and miracles. Please try and post and be more specific. There may be others here that know of the same diagnosis and may be able to help you get more information. Try to stay as calm as you can so you can get knowledge to fight for yourself. Miracles can happen. (((((((((((((((jj))))))))))))) praying now............  Don't let your alcoholic husband give you any nonsupport now. Come here for the support you need. Remember, his disease prevents him from having the compassion you need now. I know this from how my daughter use to act. They really can't help not being compassionate when their disease is in control.  Email or pm me here......praying again......cdb

-- Edited by cdb at 19:41, 2005-04-20

Hi again JJ, God!

I don't really know what to say, but I do want to tell you that miracles really do happen! I am praying freverently (sp?) with all my heart for you.

I know from your posts that you are a wonderful, caring, loving person, and I feel like you are a part of my family, you are, my MIP family.

I have lived through not just one miracle, but several. Don't give up hope! I was hit by a 3 ton truck when I was 15, kicked in the head by a horse, and smashed into a cement pillar. So, take it from me lady, miracles do happen! Also, from being hit by that truck, I was told I could never have children, and there are two more miracles!

It seems so cold, your husband saying you're over-reacting! It is just part of his disease. I'm also praying that this will be his wake-up-call !! I am praying that he will be there for you and will be strong for you.

If you need someone to talk to Hon, please e-mail me. I have a real big shoulder !! I'm not as wise as some, but I really do love you and care.TLC2@hotmail.com. Do you have any family near? Anyway, please know your family here at MIP are praying with all our hearts! TLC

sorry!! my email is :TLC2_123@hotmail.com. sometimes my poor ole brain gets fuddled :)

Thank you my dear friends and new family!!! Your kind words mean so much to me!!! 

I recieved a call this morning from infectious diseas control doctor and saw him immediately! He litened me up quite a bit!!! Gave me a bit of hope rather than just talk about my fatal disease I have contracted! So I have started a new clinical trial which is giving me some hope.

Sory I was so vague lastnigh I was so upset lastnight typing through desperate tears. My dentist perscribed an antibiotic which distroyed the good bacteria in my gut and this infectious bacteria took over and a toxin has gone through my body. My bowels are shutting down and so are my kidneys this is happening so fast! The chances of contracting this is 3%, well I got it. So me being the person I am researched it so much that when I was at the dr office new exactly what he was talking about. Good to know!! even if it is almost all bad news.

I can never explain the feeling of knowing that my death could be so near and the thought of my kids consume my mind!!! especially with their dad. My SIL and BFF (same person) gave me comfort that my children would be well looked after by her whom by the way is having trouble having children of her own. I love her in a very special way and she was there for the birth of both of my kids.

OK on the liter side this doctor gave me hope and I know that mericals happen as I too like TLC have had a few in my life, surviving a car accident that in now way should have. I rolled a truck and went out the back window it was truely a miricale!! and just like TLC have been kicked in the head by a horse. (so simmilar) wow. I hope that I am granted one more!! I will continue to pray for my self.

I have come to terms with the non supportive hubby it is not comforting but I will get over it. I have support from my mom, sister and SIL and they have been great!!

I actually smiled today and had a laugh You are all a part of my family and love you all thank you so much for your prayers and support. I will keep you all posted.

Love JJ

 

OH Sweetheart!! I will pray so much for you and your babies. It is so hard to know what to say. I don't understand why you are not in the hospital? It is vital to keep your organs going. Do you feel comfortable giving someone your phone number? Mine is listed anyway, 541-259-0500. please feel free to call!! I mean anytime. I don't want you to feel alone. Is there anything I can do???? I am in Oregon, where are you??? much LOVE, debilyn

Debilyn,

Thank you!! I am not alone my mom is staying a few days to monitor me to make sure I have someone here just in case and help me out. I have been reasurred alot today and looking towards a recovery with this drug that I started with it is possible, so that was good news. Thank you for your phone # I may very well call you when mom goes and I am as terrified as I was the last couple of days. Today was a better day and tomorrow will be better! I am praying. Thank you so much!!!

I am not in the hospital but being very closly watched. Like today I was tested every 2 hours and they do eco cardio gram every 2 hours as well. The doctor is comming to my house and I feel like he is looking after my best interest. Maybe it is only because of the trial thing but I am greatful that this doctor found me.

If this drug works I am supposed to see positive results in the next 4 days so I am hoping!

I am in Alberta Canada

Thank you again

Jen

Hi jj im so sorry your going through this. Youve been a big help for me while my mom was here. And im grateful for that. IF you need to talk or vent ill be there to listen. Stay strong,

 

kerry

((((JJ))))

I don't even know what to write. I'm sorry you have to go through this. Wow that sounds so hollow, but I really mean it.

I'm glad the Doctor has given you some hope and that you found the trials.

You just keep fighting this and I truly believe you will win. You have to. Hang in there for yourself and those little ones.

Please know I wll be praying for you and thinking about you.

Don't even give a thought to your A, being supportive is sadly not in their making most of the time. Concentrate on you, more so now than ever, and lean on us, and anyone else you can.

                      Lots of love

                      Jeannie

I am so sorry for this happening to you. Be strong, as others said... todays medicine is right up there, and definately keep asking questions, and if you are not satisfied with one doctor , go to another and another. You said you live in Canada,,and we have one of THE best medical care services in the world. I will be thinking of you and my prayers are with you. I know you will overcome this.

gardengal

JJ Hang in there girl you and your children are in my prayers. I am glad to hear you have such a caring and loving doc that is a blessing.... Please keep us posted on how you are doing. Love ya lots bubbles

JJ

I  too believe in miracles and in HP deeply ... I am also praying for you and will ask others for thier prayers for you

I do believe God will heal you I DO ....Thank you for telling us what is going on with you

I am praying for you your kids and even your A for him to wake up

we will get through  this together

 Much love ,

Fiona123

when you are in the room ? ask around , one of the ladies is in a porayer circle on line

I will try to find out who

*HUUUUUUGS *

 

-- Edited by fiona123 at 13:10, 2005-04-21

Keep your faith! I have personally witnessed several situations where people who were given no hope fully recovered from their illnesses. A positive outlook can make a difference. I know you will make it. Thinking of you and hope to hear good news.

Lynnatal