Hello...I am new to Al-Anon so please forgive my ignorance. My problem is my 31 year old divorced daughter who is addicted to Meth. I was told that Al-Anon is for families of any addictions, not just alcoholics, is this true? My wife and I are really searching for some support to deal with our problem. My daughter also has a five year old son who we adore, and we are worried sick about him. Does anyone have any suggestions or experience with this type of problem? Thank you very much.
luv123 said
Apr 11, 2005
wow--sounds like a lot on your plates! What i hav heard hear is no one cdan call anyone else an Addict unless they admit it themselves. but al-anon is for those who are troubled by anothers drinking/drugging and there they find the tools to deal with like on many levels whether they choose to stay in the relationship or not. Staying is something that many of us do and some do not, also. Often I see them back yrs. later wishing they had not left before the miracles began to happen in their lives though.
It is suggested to try working the program for yourself and your serenity for a good spell before making big decisions like staying or leaving--huge when kids r involved. Please -Please come into the online meetings & call the 800 number for local face to face meetings too, you will hear many many many important tools for coping with alcoholism/addiction or problem drinking & I promise u will not regret coming. see schedule they are online at 9 am and pm and also on weekends two per day. You can just lesten -read-if u don't want to share at first. I know u will find strength & wisdom and support like nowhere else---to deal with this and often by our changing the way we react to the Alc. they find that they must change or begin to look in mirror atleast--but we go for us and admit that we cannot really change them they must do the work themselves.
During chat time you will have the opportunity (before or after any meeting online or in person) to ask questions that are specific to your situation and get some idea of what others have found helpful. When children R involved it really gets scary and sticky---I have had addicted loved ones that I was scared for committed to programs against their will -often it does not work, unfortunately. (but it was something I had 2 try) But the situations & relationships have all changed and improved because in Al-anon I learned what I was doing that unconsciously was supporting the addict's habit and behaviors.
I am sad for you both, but very excited that you have asked for help--the journey will be simple in many ways but also very hard at times and support is crucial if u really want things to improve for all involved.-------Al-anon works when we work it so come to meetings and liten ask any and all questions during chat time. We R here for eachother in special ways.
My best to you--prayers for grandson,
With Love Luv 123
luv123 said
Apr 11, 2005
I guess am really tired --I had to apologize for my grammar etc. in above message (do U believe I am an English major too? hope it made some sense 2 u. please respond if u need to and I will check this tomorrow and reply again if needed.
LUV!@#
jj said
Apr 11, 2005
((((((((((((((Gary,Wife and grandson))))))))))))))))))<-----cyber huggs
Welcome
Alanon is indeed for family and friends you have come to the right place!!
I hope that you keep comming back.
david62 said
Apr 11, 2005
Hello Gary!
Welcome to Miracles in Progress. Al-Anon is certainly the right place for you and your wife. See if you can find a local meeting somewhere near where you live to attend...you can find much understanding there...
Also if you would like to chat with someone online about things, we have a chatroom associated with this site as well and there is almost always someone there you can talk with.
Thank you so much everyone, for your interest and prayers. I intend on attending a meeting as soon as I can locate one this week. Your encouragement and kindness is much appreciated.
suntansuzie said
Apr 12, 2005
Gary:
I know exactly what you are going through and I am still searching for help and answers too. My sister who is 35 years old and a meth user has just come out of voluntary treatment. She lost almost everything, her job, her car, her home. She was suicidal. I have taken temporary custody of her children ages 8 and 3 and have had them living with me for the past few months. CPS has also been involved but haven't helped much at all. It has been very difficult because she has been so defensive and out of control. Keep coming here and go to the chat room for meetings as well as open chat. It is worth it. There is all kinds of support and although I have not been able to yet, go to a face to face al anon meeting. I am still working on it but have heard that is the way to go. I wish you the best of luck and my thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family. Would love to chat with you about it sometime as well.
Suntansuzie
suntansuzie said
Apr 12, 2005
Also, check out my post from several days ago named "Choices". Print it out and put it on your refrigerator and read it every day. It is very inspiring!
Gary said
Apr 12, 2005
Thank you very much for a very inspiring message...it helps!
Gary
cloud said
Apr 12, 2005
Hi Gary and family my prayers are with you my husbands drug of choice is alcohol, but he just got out of detox and rehab I am not sure this will help but there was a lot of meth. and heroine, coke users and their families were told of a program called N/a Narcartics anon. and for you narnon I think is the name but you can look in the yellow pages of your local directory and if you call any rehab they can refer you to the best type of programs and meetings. If you are in fear for grandson maybe social services can help you obtain temporary gaurdianship until the addict in your lives can manage their addiction Yes grandparents have rights in the legal system. Good Luck I hope things work out ((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))) CLoud p.s. I have only been doing alanon 2 1/2 mo nad everyone is great you will learn though others strengh and hope.
wow--sounds like a lot on your plates! What i hav heard hear is no one cdan call anyone else an Addict unless they admit it themselves. but al-anon is for those who are troubled by anothers drinking/drugging and there they find the tools to deal with like on many levels whether they choose to stay in the relationship or not. Staying is something that many of us do and some do not, also. Often I see them back yrs. later wishing they had not left before the miracles began to happen in their lives though.
It is suggested to try working the program for yourself and your serenity for a good spell before making big decisions like staying or leaving--huge when kids r involved. Please -Please come into the online meetings & call the 800 number for local face to face meetings too, you will hear many many many important tools for coping with alcoholism/addiction or problem drinking & I promise u will not regret coming. see schedule they are online at 9 am and pm and also on weekends two per day. You can just lesten -read-if u don't want to share at first. I know u will find strength & wisdom and support like nowhere else---to deal with this and often by our changing the way we react to the Alc. they find that they must change or begin to look in mirror atleast--but we go for us and admit that we cannot really change them they must do the work themselves.
During chat time you will have the opportunity (before or after any meeting online or in person) to ask questions that are specific to your situation and get some idea of what others have found helpful. When children R involved it really gets scary and sticky---I have had addicted loved ones that I was scared for committed to programs against their will -often it does not work, unfortunately. (but it was something I had 2 try) But the situations & relationships have all changed and improved because in Al-anon I learned what I was doing that unconsciously was supporting the addict's habit and behaviors.
I am sad for you both, but very excited that you have asked for help--the journey will be simple in many ways but also very hard at times and support is crucial if u really want things to improve for all involved.-------Al-anon works when we work it so come to meetings and liten ask any and all questions during chat time. We R here for eachother in special ways.
My best to you--prayers for grandson,
With Love Luv 123
I guess am really tired --I had to apologize for my grammar etc. in above message (do U believe I am an English major too? hope it made some sense 2 u. please respond if u need to and I will check this tomorrow and reply again if needed.
LUV!@#
((((((((((((((Gary,Wife and grandson))))))))))))))))))<-----cyber huggs
Welcome
Alanon is indeed for family and friends you have come to the right place!!
I hope that you keep comming back.
Hello Gary!
Welcome to Miracles in Progress. Al-Anon is certainly the right place for you and your wife. See if you can find a local meeting somewhere near where you live to attend...you can find much understanding there...
Also if you would like to chat with someone online about things, we have a chatroom associated with this site as well and there is almost always someone there you can talk with.
http://www.12stepforums.net/ then click on Al-Anon Meeting Room....wait a few minutes for the room to load.
Welcome to Al-Anon..
Yours in Recovery,
David
Gary:
I know exactly what you are going through and I am still searching for help and answers too. My sister who is 35 years old and a meth user has just come out of voluntary treatment. She lost almost everything, her job, her car, her home. She was suicidal. I have taken temporary custody of her children ages 8 and 3 and have had them living with me for the past few months. CPS has also been involved but haven't helped much at all. It has been very difficult because she has been so defensive and out of control. Keep coming here and go to the chat room for meetings as well as open chat. It is worth it. There is all kinds of support and although I have not been able to yet, go to a face to face al anon meeting. I am still working on it but have heard that is the way to go. I wish you the best of luck and my thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family. Would love to chat with you about it sometime as well.
Suntansuzie
Thank you very much for a very inspiring message...it helps!
Gary