I haven't posted here in a while. I am doing very good since the last time I posted. My husband is now sober for over 56 days. I have gotten a sponsor. The thing that I am having a problem is control, it is a major problem. I am having a hard time with it. My husband is trying to get more indpendence to get better and I want to control things from not changing. I hate good and bad change. I have recently moved into a new apt that I thought I would hate and I have turn out to love it. I was so upset that I was cutting my arm because I was stressing my self out that much.

I am trying work the program but like I have a problem with control. He wants to work in the post office but the sad things is I don't want him to because I wouldn't be able to spend time with him. I hate the idea of the change.

BECKY

hi there

change is hard, but realizing how you act or react to it is the first step to changeing.

control is another hard thing to work thru- i can relate, i want to control the outcome of things with my daughter and get into pointing things out that could happen- ya know, the what ifs...

i can work myself into a paralyzing frenzy if i allow the control to take over. i will pray for you.

s

Hello ny , well we are pieces of work aren't we, we want them to stop drinking and when they do we dont like the changes that happen, any doubt that we are a little sick ?? hehe Have beenwhere your at ny , take it one day at a time and you will be just fine. remembe that the only thing that is constant is change , go with the flow accept what is and enjoy.

Glad u like your new apt. and wish hubby luck with his new job it will be good for both of you he won't be working 24-7 so u will have some time with h im. We cannot be an extention of someone else and be happy. Two happy individuals I believe have a better chance of making it. When I depend on someone else to make me feel whole I am in big troublel. I am the onl yone that can do that for me. took me awhile to understand that . So be patient with yourself ny and relax and enjoy sobriety. It was along time commin. 

Becky, I, too, struggled for a long time with Step One. Ultimately, I had to hit my personal bottom to become willing enough to admit that I am powerless over alcohol and that my life has become unmanageable. The good news is, once I was able to admit that, I could go on to step two and things slowly got better! I am to hear you were cutting yourself. I do the same thing in similar situations even though I know how bad it is for me. Try to love yourself just a little bit more each day. If you turn your cutting over to your HP, you may be surprised by the results! I have very little desire to hurt myself in that way now compared to even six months ago. Keep coming back and thank you for your share. Love and hugs, Jessi