I’ve let this disease that belongs to another consume me
Accepting impending doom; till I could no longer see
I have fed it, fought it, and let it lead
I have forgotten who I am, & what it is I need
I’ve chosen an endless path with no light
I’ve given it my all from day to night
I am not winning this battle I’ve chosen to fight
For it’s not my battle; it isn’t my right
I’m holding the reins to another’s voyage or trip
I thought it was my job, for it is my relationship
The path was never darkened, I can now see
It was my eyes that were closed, this is the key
I won’t give in to that disease; I’ll give up to my Higher Power
I’ll detach with love, communicate; and live each hour
I’ll be indifferent to the disease; but love the person inside
I won’ judge; for I too have faults I cannot hide
I must do more than have faith & pray
I’ll plan for tomorrow but live for today
12 steps; two forward; one back
Yes, I’ll slip, but will get back on track
Falling doesn’t matter, as much as, getting up & going on
I cannot help others, if myself I con
I’ll do something for myself each and every day
Live and Let Live, or Let Live and Live, it is ok
I need not always speak, but always listen with my heart
I’ll learn from both sides; remembering I can’t do their part
"Let Go, Let God," I can hear a voice
I can control, ......my life,...... this is my choice
by babs 3-6-05
TLC2 said
Mar 6, 2005
Wow, thanks for the awesome share! TLC
shimo said
Mar 6, 2005
Awesome.....just awesome!! Thanks so much, babs, for sharing your poem. Powerful description of how alcoholism affects our lives...I can see the picture in it. I will be reading this over and over!!
Love in recovery - Jeri (Shimo)
Jeannie said
Mar 6, 2005
Great Poem Babs! Thanks for sharing your feelings.
Love Jeannie
cdb said
Mar 6, 2005
Wow babs! Awesome post and the form you put it in is amazing! I am speechless now. It was like you were telling my story. Thanks for posting this and sharing it with me. cdb wow
megan said
Mar 7, 2005
thanks Babs, that is a great poem and oh, so very very true
estrelladehope said
Mar 7, 2005
Great Poem! I really enjoyed it bc it is so true!
richard said
Mar 7, 2005
This detachment thing… hating the disease… loving the person inside… all beings of God deserves to be loved and are loved by God… God is in all and is all. A chronic drunk driver deserves to be loved… she or he deserves to be in prison for the protection of society and the drunk. A mate addicted to drugs like alcohol, etc. deserves love… she or he deserve to lose all so to hit bottom and by God’s plan, in desperation genuinely reach out for help. Am I biologically addicted to drugs like alcohol? I do not have any facts that indicate that I am. No doctor, surgeon, medical university, research laboratory has done any exploratory ventures into my brain. Was it my choice to pick up the first toxic substance (alcohol for me)? It does not matter. What fact I do have is that it is my choice to do what it takes to not pick up the first toxic substance again. My point… that chronic abuser of drugs like alcohol, etc… she or he deserves to be loved… do doubt… but he does not deserve to have his laundry done by another… she does not deserve to be financially support by another… they deserve the God given right to find their solution at rock bottom… desperate. So, this is what I believe and that “I” is as in me. Those actively addicted to drugs like alcohol have the choice to become inactive… it is there choice… thus; it is their choice to stay active. In addition, their choice to remain addicted is made easier when they have the normal amenities in life. Have any of you ever been without bath or shower for 7, 10, 20, and more days? Whew… stenchy , dirt crusted… or be so hungry… water seems like a meal, or roll up in tall hay to keep a little bit warm at night… great motivators for change. Does not always work… but…
Sober = “the showing of mental and emotional balance”. Is it a sober thing to stay in a relationship that the only ‘relating’ going on is between the drunk and hers or his bottle, dry alcohol, etc? At what social cost is there for one, for the sake of keeping “a” / “any” relationship (so called relationship) just for the sake of not being without a relationship… to one addicted to relationships, even a bad one will do.
True story… way down in the outback of Texas in the late seventies… a tiny pig farm, pigs and marijuana together in same field… the pot was raunchy… the others in the car were laughing and complaining about the quality of the pot… I said, “It works”!
If only one person in a person to person marriage believes she or he is married and the other’s actions states the other is not... is there a marriage?
Just a thought.
Of course, all bottoms are not equal in intensity before genuine and lasting change takes place… so it seems. I have not done any studies on those that hit the deepest bottoms and those that have relatively high bottoms to whose changes last longer.
I’ve let this disease that belongs to another consume me
Accepting impending doom; till I could no longer see
I have fed it, fought it, and let it lead
I have forgotten who I am, & what it is I need
I’ve chosen an endless path with no light
I’ve given it my all from day to night
I am not winning this battle I’ve chosen to fight
For it’s not my battle; it isn’t my right
I’m holding the reins to another’s voyage or trip
I thought it was my job, for it is my relationship
The path was never darkened, I can now see
It was my eyes that were closed, this is the key
I won’t give in to that disease; I’ll give up to my Higher Power
I’ll detach with love, communicate; and live each hour
I’ll be indifferent to the disease; but love the person inside
I won’ judge; for I too have faults I cannot hide
I must do more than have faith & pray
I’ll plan for tomorrow but live for today
12 steps; two forward; one back
Yes, I’ll slip, but will get back on track
Falling doesn’t matter, as much as, getting up & going on
I cannot help others, if myself I con
I’ll do something for myself each and every day
Live and Let Live, or Let Live and Live, it is ok
I need not always speak, but always listen with my heart
I’ll learn from both sides; remembering I can’t do their part
"Let Go, Let God," I can hear a voice
I can control, ......my life,...... this is my choice
by babs 3-6-05
Awesome.....just awesome!! Thanks so much, babs, for sharing your poem. Powerful description of how alcoholism affects our lives...I can see the picture in it. I will be reading this over and over!!
Love in recovery - Jeri (Shimo)
Great Poem Babs! Thanks for sharing your feelings.
Love Jeannie
Great Poem! I really enjoyed it bc it is so true!
This detachment thing… hating the disease… loving the person inside… all beings of God deserves to be loved and are loved by God… God is in all and is all. A chronic drunk driver deserves to be loved… she or he deserves to be in prison for the protection of society and the drunk. A mate addicted to drugs like alcohol, etc. deserves love… she or he deserve to lose all so to hit bottom and by God’s plan, in desperation genuinely reach out for help. Am I biologically addicted to drugs like alcohol? I do not have any facts that indicate that I am. No doctor, surgeon, medical university, research laboratory has done any exploratory ventures into my brain. Was it my choice to pick up the first toxic substance (alcohol for me)? It does not matter. What fact I do have is that it is my choice to do what it takes to not pick up the first toxic substance again. My point… that chronic abuser of drugs like alcohol, etc… she or he deserves to be loved… do doubt… but he does not deserve to have his laundry done by another… she does not deserve to be financially support by another… they deserve the God given right to find their solution at rock bottom… desperate. So, this is what I believe and that “I” is as in me. Those actively addicted to drugs like alcohol have the choice to become inactive… it is there choice… thus; it is their choice to stay active. In addition, their choice to remain addicted is made easier when they have the normal amenities in life. Have any of you ever been without bath or shower for 7, 10, 20, and more days? Whew… stenchy , dirt crusted… or be so hungry… water seems like a meal, or roll up in tall hay to keep a little bit warm at night… great motivators for change. Does not always work… but…
Sober = “the showing of mental and emotional balance”. Is it a sober thing to stay in a relationship that the only ‘relating’ going on is between the drunk and hers or his bottle, dry alcohol, etc? At what social cost is there for one, for the sake of keeping “a” / “any” relationship (so called relationship) just for the sake of not being without a relationship… to one addicted to relationships, even a bad one will do.
True story… way down in the outback of Texas in the late seventies… a tiny pig farm, pigs and marijuana together in same field… the pot was raunchy… the others in the car were laughing and complaining about the quality of the pot… I said, “It works”!
is there a marriage?
Just a thought.
Of course, all bottoms are not equal in intensity before genuine and lasting change takes place… so it seems. I have not done any studies on those that hit the deepest bottoms and those that have relatively high bottoms to whose changes last longer.
Hugs & Luv,
beautiful and just what I needed!
josey