hello all you friendly al-anon people. my name is claire, and i'm an american living in japan. i picked up al-anon as a way of life during my last year at college, but then jeted out here, and so have been without meetings for about 7 months. in general i'm doing a good job of keeping it together- daily reading, prayer, meditation, but i'm showing the cracks at this point. specificaly the self-confidence issues i thought i'd already kicked. i have more growing to do. anyway, thanks for having this list, i'll check in every so often and keep tabs on what kind of comfort i can find from detached cyber meetings.

Claire, Welcome to this list... I'm glad you found us. Self-esteem is a never-ending issue for me. I do a pretty good job with it at times and totally flunk out in other situations. I have found it most helpful for me to work on accepting myself for exactly who I am in that moment. So much of my self-esteem issues start with me not allowing myself to be human. I don't want to make mistakes or have conflict -- ever. It's so much easier for me to have a good attitude and like myself when I stop trying to be my own HP. Hope this helps and keep coming back. Love and hugs, Jessi

Welcome and Keep Coming Back....This is the place.   : )   I cannot begin to tell you how fast I have grown here in the past 2 1/2 yrs.!    "It works if you work it"

-- Edited by wallsal55 at 19:23, 2005-02-14

You wrote, “i have more growing to do.” I very sure that a couple of days or for eternity after our bodies are ‘six feet under’, we will still be growing.

Hugs & Luv,

wow! thanks for all the replies guys! i don't know why i'm suprised, i always got more support than i thought possible at physical meetings, so why should online sources be any different. as for the specific problems- i need to get back to journaling. it is difficult for me, i suppose bc i feel i might let loose something i can't take back. this is, of course the point, but i'm without my normal support network out here, so it's very frightening to try and work on myself. which is also of course the point- moving out of my comfort zone and seeing what i find. some backround is i suppose in order- after about a year in the program, i feel comfortable with my higher power and my life has turned into a much more livable place. i have really spectacular friends out here in japan, and, more to the point, i know that ultimately i have to provide the support for myself that i used to depend on other people for. i have been putting off the fourth step until i could find a sponser i felt comfortable with. but, since i am pretty on my own out here, i've begun looking into the fourth step book- that was what set off the most recent bout of self-hatred (i think- my self-hatred isnt' really a rational thing). that's enough for now, i guess. i'll report back when i've journaled some. thanks again! claire